Behind the Red Glass
by Blue-Eyed-Blonde90
Summary: AU. Discontinued. In a life where passion and creativity have been her only stability, how will Naomi cope when she meets someone who will, eventually, turn everything she knew upside-down?
1. Embers

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A puff of smoke drifts up from her lips and clouds her vision in wispy swirls whilst she surveys the scene before her. A curly-haired brunette girl walks across her eyeline with a bulky rucksack hanging off her shoulders – she almost has to repress the urge to laugh at how the bag weighs the girl down, mammoth in its size in comparison to the girl's slight frame. Finds it even harder to keep a smirk off her face once an older boy roughly passes by and brushes the girl's shoulder in the process, almost sending her to the ground. The girl is startled and flustered as she realizes what's happened but then she, only just, gathers her bearings again before continuing on her merry way.

Yet this scene isn't entirely extraordinary – because no sooner is the girl out of sight than is there an equally as clueless and excited group of girls and guys following after her.

Naomi scoffs. _Fucking first years, _she thinks sardonically to herself, taking another long drag of her cigarette. She shakes her head. Briefly wonders if she had been as jittery and ecstatic this time last year – dismisses the thought at once. Of course not. Being like that is just embarrassing, and she never allows herself to act so naive. Not then, not now – standing alone in the crisp September air with half a cigarette dangling from in between the index and middle finger of her left hand.

She lets her eyes flicker down to the diminishing embers of her cigarette and inadvertently sets her gaze on her fingertips. Deep indentions are still set into her calluses. She promptly disregards them. She never cared for the manicured look. Not like most of these new fresher girls; prepped and primped to a tee as they futilely try to attract the attention of the absent-minded boys they're lusting after. Only later will they realize that their attempts usually end up in vain, because freshman guys rarely look for relationships when there's this whole new college territory to explore; parties to attend; pills to take; girls to bed.

Yeah. Fucking first years indeed.

Naomi drops her fag butt to the ground and quickly stomps on the dwindling ashes. Then she shrugs her hefty green parka closer around her shoulders and pulls her beanie tighter around her ears. She crosses her arms in front her chest. It offers a meagre amount of protection against the cold.

Her next class is due to start in ten minutes, yet she doesn't feel the need to hurry off to it. Frankly, she's unenthusiastic. It's only been a few days since term started and already her classes have presented her with a pile of work. Assignments, outside reading, looming essays. The summer had been too cushioning and now reality was giving her a firm smack. All work and no more play. Back to business.

Eventually she realizes she can't put things off any longer and roughly tugs her satchel strap back around her neck and heads back into the arts block. Predictably there's another rush of freshers to greet her as they all dash around, hastily scanning their schedules and looking around every which way in confusion as they search for their designated rooms. She rolls her eyes and ignores them. Succeeds in doing so until she's climbed the stairs to the second floor and turns a corner – because that's when she crashes into a small, flustered body.

"Oops, sorry!" exclaims the stranger hurriedly while her book drops to the floor. Naomi simultaneously jerks back and steadies herself. A scowl quickly mars her features as the typical thought crosses her mind – _Another bloody fresher. _She straightens herself while the girl bends down to retrieve her book. Prepares to shrug off the naive stranger when she feels her planned, derisive comment become inexplicably lodged in her throat.

Once fully upright again, Naomi's gaze is met with a petite girl staring anxiously at her. Even the contrite expression on her face does nothing to obscure her understated beauty. Long and silky crimson red hair flows down from underneath a black bobble hat, coming to rest just below her collarbone. An adorable button nose sits in the middle of her cute, almost pixie-like face. Her cheeks are tinted with a faint pink flush. But it's her eyes that captivate Naomi the most – those big, sparkling brown doe eyes, while they flicker repeatedly up and down between Naomi and the book now back in her arms.

Naomi's mind goes blank momentarily, too caught off guard with her sudden interest in this redheaded girl to speak. The girl eventually notices her lack of response and awkwardly addresses it. "Um...are you okay?" she asks quietly, eyebrow quirked and those sparkling brown eyes inquisitive.

Naomi shakes her head hastily, ridding herself of her muteness. "Erm yeah, I am. Sorry" she answers, her mouth feeling dry for some reason. Sorry? Why should she be sorry? This girl clearly has no regard for anyone, rushing around so mindlessly. Yet Naomi can't help it as a smile colours her face briefly before she quickly glances away. She feels oddly ill-equipped all of a sudden. When she looks back, it's to see the girl grinning. The sight of it causes a fluttering sensation to begin in her stomach. Doesn't know what it means. "Well, I uh, better...go" she says after another awkward moment, abruptly finding that she wants to be as far away from this girl as possible. This stranger.

The girl doesn't argue. They both give a curt nod and Naomi takes off past the redheaded stranger, leaving both their exchange and her lapse in composure behind. When she eventually takes her seat in the lecture, which has now thankfully started, it's with relief. Allows her to focus on something other than her muddled thoughts or the flurry of activity in her stomach.

Fifty minutes later and Naomi emerges from the theatre with another item of required reading to add to her ever-growing list. Groans at the thought of it. How she's going to keep up with all of this work and balance it with her outside commitments was a mystery – but she couldn't start complaining now. Instead she finds her feet moving of their own accord to the nearest coffee shop, reasoning that caffeine might help to lighten her mood. It definitely couldn't hurt.

She joins the queue of weary and preoccupied students and runs a hand through her long peroxide blonde locks, releasing a sigh. She'd taken off her hat during the lecture and her hair now lies a bit flat because of it, but she doesn't care. Her hair doesn't tend to behave most of the time anyway and this proves a change from its usual trend of sticking out in a chaotic fashion.

She's at the top of the queue, collecting her mocha, when a strangely familiar voice murmurs behind her. "Careful when you turn around. Books are fine, but I doubt either one of us wants coffee all down their front". Her fingers instinctively clench around her cup while she slowly revolves around. It's the same redhead from earlier; only this time there's no book in her hand and her expression is brighter. Calmer. A coy smile is stretched across her face.

And bizarrely, the blonde finds herself grinning back. Again. "Well, lucky for you, I tend to look where I'm going. Unlike some people" she replies coolly. There's implication in her voice as she takes a sip from her cup and her eyes narrow mischievously.

The girl's smile widens and she blinks deliberately. "Is that accusation I hear?" she asks. The huskiness of her voice reverberates through Naomi's skull. "'Cause, unless I'm mistaken, you seemed just as careless with your sense of direction earlier, as well" she retorts, biting her lip.

Naomi's just about to reply when she hears a groan of frustration in her periphery – she looks up to find a queue of annoyed customers standing behind them. The redhead quickly notices too and they both step out of the line, but not before Naomi catches the embarrassed look that flashes across the girl's face. Finds her stomach bubbling again at the endearment of it.

"I knew exactly where I was going – _you, _on the other hand, were a confused mess. But you _are _a freshman, I suppose, so I can't say I blame you" she continues in an innocent tone. The girl gasps in mock offence while Naomi takes another sip. Then she watches as the girl tucks a strand of red hair behind her ear. Naomi trains her eyes on the action, momentarily distracted. Her hat is gone too; glossy strands of hair fall about her cheeks and further down her shoulders. The red is more vivid, no longer hidden by the hat. Intense. Crimson. Burning.

"What makes you think I'm a freshman?" the redhead asks astutely. Naomi can't help but notice that her words seem very far away.

The blonde swallows an insult. "Just a guess" is all she says, before finally meeting the girl's eyes again. The mischief is gone from her expression and in its place a look of curiosity and expectation. It's this, more than anything, which allows the next question to fall from Naomi's lips without reserve. "What's your name?" she asks, her voice noticeably gentler.

Another cute smile. "Emily" she says simply, extending her hand. Naomi glances at it, then up to her face, before taking the hand with her free one and shaking it firmly.

"Naomi" she replies confidently. She allows a smirk to pull at the corner of her lips, masking the anxiety she feels on the inside. _Nervous. When do I get nervous? _she thinks uncomprehendingly to herself once they both let go. She watches as Emily looks down awkwardly and shuffles her feet. Thinks of what to say next. Her tongue feels huge in her dry mouth. But when Emily looks up again there's another inquisitive look in her eye and Naomi realizes that_ this_ is the reason she's nervous. Can't for the life of her figure out why.

"So, Naomi" Emily says, rolling the name off her tongue as if testing it. Then she smiles softly. "What are you studying?"

Naomi's smirk widens and she's about to rattle off her practiced spiel, when a vibrating sensation interrupts her train of thought. An imperceptible frown creases her brow fleetingly – she conceals it from Emily – and she pulls up her satchel flap and reaches inside. Seconds later and her phone is clutched in her long fingers, the screen indicating she has one new message. She opens it and reads it rapidly. Her expression contorts into a grimace.

She finds her gaze involuntarily flickering back up to Emily. Those bright brown eyes are staring intently at her, although Naomi notices they're a bit more narrowed than before. Finds herself surprised that she can even tell. "I'm sorry, Emily" she mumbles softly, and she really is. "I have to go now" she explains unhelpfully. She shrugs in an apologetic sort of way.

A genuine, although tight, smile flashes across Emily's face. "No problem. I have to get to my next class anyway" the redhead says smoothly. Detachedly. "I'll see you around, then" she adds. Less of a question than Naomi would like.

The blonde nods stiffly and runs a hand through her hair again. "Yeah. See you around". _I hope, _her brain hastens to add, much to her confusion. And that's it; Emily turns around and walks out the door of the shop without glancing back. Naomi stands there staring after her for a moment. Then she takes another sip of her mocha, just for something to do. Abruptly remembering she has somewhere to be however, she forces her feet to move and quickly walks through the block and back out the entrance.

She tries not to let her brain linger on her exchange with the redheaded stranger. Finds it practically impossible as she trudges to the green. The red and gold autumn leaves kick at her heels while she walks. Her attention immediately focuses on the red ones.

Questions plague her from every angle whilst she pulls out her hat and pulls it close over her ears once more. Why hadn't Emily – cute, bouncy, naive little Emily – annoyed her, like so many other newbies would have? And why, despite the fact that they were in a coffee shop, did Emily fail to buy any coffee? Nevertheless, as Naomi approaches the green she forces herself to push these questions and flashes of crimson red from her brain.

Emily's just a girl. Just another student. Normal, unremarkable. Naomi would probably never see her again. _Forget about her, _she commands herself with a stern frown.

Just a girl.

The blonde looks up then and smiles. There she stands. Powerful. Confident. Otherworldly. She leans against the back of a wooden bench with her arms and ankles crossed, her stance ever the enigma. People pass by and do double takes, although Naomi can hardly blame them. She exudes the aura of a Goddess; someone who shouldn't belong in these simple surroundings, this campus green, or wear such plain clothing.

Naomi draws nearer and the girl spots her. A faint smile brightens her pallid face, but it's gone in the blink of an eye. "Hey" the girl says once Naomi comes to a stop just in front of her.

The blonde's fingers twitch on her satchel strap. "Hey Effy" she replies, biting her lip. Naomi observes while she pulls out a cigarette packet from her breast pocket. She offers the pack to Naomi, who politely declines. Then she takes one out, deftly lights it, and returns the pack to her pocket. Takes a long drag and exhales, the smoke swirling up between them.

"How was your literature lecture?" Effy asks, surveying her with those searching, ethereal blue eyes.

Naomi shrugs noncommittally. "Alright, I guess. Bit boring" she plainly answers. Silence befalls them while Effy continues to drag on her fag. Naomi stares out over the green in the meantime. Students have taken to sitting on the grass; they eat, they chat. The dew coating the ground fails to put them off. When she meets Effy's eyes again, she's not surprised to find the brunette watching her. It's commonplace now. Effy watches everybody.

Another drag. "You're happy" she says next.

Naomi's brow creases. "Pardon?" she asks.

Effy tucks some of her scraggly brown hair behind her ear. "Glowing. You've got a glow" she comments. Naomi holds her stare. Blue holds blue. She doesn't look away, but Effy's expression fails to waver either. Naomi sighs. Doesn't even know what to say.

"Right" is all she replies with instead, hastily looking away. Effy doesn't push it. In fact, she doesn't say anything at all. They continue to stand in silence until Naomi sees a cigarette butt fall to the ground out of the corner of her eye.

"We've got practice this evening. Cook wants to run through the set" says Effy eventually. Naomi nods. Doesn't comment. She looks back at Effy, whose face is lit up with a wry grin. "Want to get something to eat?" she asks softly. She backs off the bench and stands upright. Then reaches for Naomi's hand and twines their fingers together.

Naomi smiles at this rare gesture of affection. "Sure" she replies. She hesitates, then leans forward to peck Effy on the lips. They stroll down the path together, hand in hand. The blonde looks down at their joined hands. Effy's fingers are cold and, upon further inspection, faintly blue in colour. But they're steady. Firm. She looks up again and another red leaf flitters down in front of her face. It gets crushed by her boot while she walks.

.


	2. Swallows & Robins

_So...I'm back. Surprise! That break didn't go as planned, as you can already tell...turns out I was more organized than I previously gave myself credit for – spare time plus an active imagination results in a new story!_

_This one is going to be very different, as you've probably guessed. Well, if your reviews are anything to go by! Thanks for the copious amount of support already by the way, I was quite surprised to have such a reaction to this! I don't want to give too much away right off, but just expect the unexpected..._

_Okay, here we go! Enjoy, hopefully._

_._

* * *

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She rolls over and sighs loudly. Her eyes follow a long crack through the plaster in the ceiling before settling on a tangle of cobwebs in the corner. Then she notices the soft swishing noise to her left, the beat rhythmic and deep. Her head lolls towards it.

Effy's hair is splayed out across the pillow next to hers. Her back faces Naomi, and the blonde watches as her sides inflate and deflate in breath. Naomi's gaze gradually traces along the arch of her back; the soft curve of it, the visible vertebrae protruding from beneath fragile flesh. Without thinking, she reaches out a hand to caress soft skin. Her fingertips dance along Effy's spine and up to her shoulder blades, where Naomi doesn't hesitate in brushing back some stray hair.

She uncovers a small swallow across Effy's right shoulder. She strokes it, her thoughts pensive. She's seen it countless times before, but always ends up analyzing it nonetheless. Initially she thought it was an odd choice of tattoo for someone like Effy – swallows were generally thought to be symbols of hope, love and prosperity. And not to sound brash, but Effy conveyed none of those things. Detached, aloof, pessimistic – _that _was Effy. But, eventually, the hidden meaning of her ink became clear – Greek legend claims that swallows were associated with the souls of the dead, and Effy always had this eerie quality about her. The bird is seen as bad luck in other cultures, symbolizing danger. Upon knowing as much, Naomi thereby deduced that the tattoo was in fact perfect for Effy – indefinable, ambiguous, cryptic. Free...ready to break out its wings and fly away if needs be.

Her fingertips continue to flit across the nape of Effy's neck when she feels her form stir. "If you wanted to grope me, you could at least have waited till I was awake". A soft smile breaks Naomi's sober expression. She retracts her hand slowly whilst Effy twists around. Her face is weary and her skin is as pale as ever, but her eyes somehow remain piercing and raw.

Naomi chews on her lip. "Morning" she murmurs in a cracked voice.

Tired lids blink over pale blue eyes. "Yeah" she simply offers. Before Naomi can say anything else, Effy has rolled over again and planted her bare soles on the wooden floor. The blonde watches, unspeaking, as the girl's slim frame rises to standing and she begins to pick her clothes up off the floor.

"You don't want any breakfast?" Naomi asks.

Effy confirms her assumption with a shake of the head. "I'm not really a breakfast person, you know that. And I've got a psych lecture in fifteen minutes. I'll get something on the way". Naomi continues to observe as Effy puts on the last of her clothing; her bare tits disappear underneath a plain black bra and a Jimi Hendrix t-shirt.

Naomi sits up. "Can't spare a few more minutes, no?" she asks, her eyes narrowing. Effy meets her gaze at last and Naomi is irked to see a smirk playing on her lips.

"Not today babe" she says dismissively. Naomi feels a pulse in her temple. Ignores it. This is normal. This is them.

She lets out a huff. "Fine" she eventually concedes. She throws the covers off of herself and stands up, stark naked. Watches with satisfaction as Effy eyes her hungrily. Smiles smugly when the brunette paces up to her, blue eyes flashing. Closes her eyelids and sighs when she feels Effy's chapped lips capture her own.

She feels a hand travel gently, leisurely, down her sternum and then gasps into Effy's hot mouth when the hand roughly squeezes her breast. Releases a groan when a rush of cold envelops her – Effy's pulled away.

Her vision is dazed when her eyelids open again, but she definitely can't miss the desire in those empyreal blue eyes staring back at her. "I'll text you later, Naomi" the brunette ultimately says. She winks and whirls around with a flourish to scoop up her bag. Then she leaves the room, and Naomi can hear her footsteps as they approach the front door. Then there's a bang and she's gone.

Naomi sighs and runs her hands through her peroxide hair. She can't even pretend to be surprised. This was Effy for you. One moment she's ravishing you with her wild desires; the next she's leaving you naked and alone in your apartment. But that was just how they were together, and Naomi – although reluctant to admit it most of the time – was, honestly, just like her. And when one of them was hot, the other would be cold – and it looked like Effy was feeling particularly icy today.

She sits back down on the mattress. Scrunches up her brow and squeezes her fingers to the bridge of her nose. Feels a headache coming on and is not entirely sure why. Sees a dull flash of red whenever she closes her eyelids. It intensifies her headache even further.

It's been a week since she ran into that redheaded freshman; Emily was her name. She hasn't seen her since. Probably won't again. Nevertheless Naomi, for some unfathomable reason, can't seem to rid her thoughts of the girl. It's like her brain has been programmed to remember their encounter at the oddest of times. One example happened just two days ago – she and her bandmates had been running through their set again, and Cook – their drummer – had thrown a freaker because of how distracted Naomi was being. The blonde had failed to mention exactly why, but she knew it was because she had caught sight of a poster on the wall. A red poster. A state of daydream had naturally followed.

She shakes her head. This was ridiculous. She was getting all confused and disorientated over nothing. Must be to do with Effy. _Eff and her fucking mixed signals, _she thinks scornfully. Yeah. Effy always knows how to muck her up. It's just how they are, and somehow it works for them. Well, she convinces herself it works. Works for her.

Knowing it's pointless to stay unmoving for any longer, Naomi decides to follow Effy's lead. Figures she'll get more done in college, rather than moping around here.

She goes to have a quick shower, and once she's done she begins to retrieve her clothes from around the room. She and Effy hadn't thought to be very tidy last night – although they could hardly be blamed when the only thing they had on their minds at the time was ripping each other's clothes off. This fact is only emphasized when Naomi spots her bra hanging off her bedside lamp. Grimacing, she grabs it and puts it on. Then she sprays on deodorant. Tosses yesterday's shirt and knickers into the laundry basket and dons replacements. Pulls on her jeans, which were previously strewn across her desk. Pulls on some woolly socks and shoves her feet into a pair of old, shabby Converse and fumblingly ties the laces. Surveys her reflection and dabs a quick coat of makeup over her face, thus hiding unwanted blemishes and illuminating her features a little. Combs out her wet hair and ties it up in a hasty ponytail so that it's somewhat less of a mess. Picks up her satchel. Another quick glance in the mirror and she deems herself acceptable. Fuck it. She never was one for self-indulgence anyway.

She steps out of her small bedroom and into the even smaller hallway. She's about to leave when a figure appears in the doorway to the sitting room. "Well, morning to you too".

She looks around and sees a tall, lanky boy leaning against the door frame eating cereal. Olive skin, black hair, deep brown eyes. He sports a lopsided grin while he appraises her. She smirks back at him. "Hey Freds" she says softly. Her eyes fall to his body, where she notices his lack of clothing. He's half-naked apart from a pair of cargo shorts. "Little underdressed, aren't we?" she comments.

Freddie shrugs dismissively. "Don't need to get dressed, no lectures today. Except I've got an assignment to do. Load of balls really" he says. He shoves another spoonful of cereal into his mouth. "Don't change the subject though" he abruptly says in between bites. "You could at least have the common decency to greet me after all the noise you made last night". His eyes flash mischievously and Naomi feels her cheeks grow hot. She unsuccessfully tries to conceal her blush.

"I wasn't...we weren't..."

"Oh trust me, I think the entire floor heard you two. Maybe the entire apartment building too. In fact I wouldn't be surprised if we got the Landlord coming down to complain about noise pollution". She releases something akin to a hiss from her throat and lunges at her roommate. He recoils too late; her hand comes down to slap his bare chest, hard. "Ow!" he exclaims just as she's whirling around to charge out the door. Right before she closes it she hears him shout a profanity at her, but she can't fail to notice the lighthearted tone it's said in. _Tosser, _she muses with smirk back in place whilst she descends the numerous sets of stairs to the ground floor. _How do I get myself into these situations? _she wonders once she's set foot outside. The pale sunlight hits her skin. Warms it. But of course she doesn't dignify her mind with an answer – because the truth is that she's hit by these situations more often than she'd like.

.

_There's a void in your eyes_

_sometimes, It reflects your sole– _Fuck, sole?

_It reflects your SOUL and _

_I wonder if– _wait, no –_WHEN it will swallow me ho––WHole._

_Do you enjoy it? This game?_

_Is the cold your only comfort when – _Jesus – _AS we_

_try to hang on?_

_You are...You are... _

Fuck it.

Naomi scribbles her pen angrily back and forth across the page, her lack of articulation breaking her at last. Christ...she was a fucking English major for fuck's sake! And now she could barely spell! _Bet my lecturers would love to see me right now, _she thinks as her eyes scan fretfully down the page. The crossed out lines of her mistakes glare menacingly at her, until she can't bear to look at them anymore. She sighs and tears out the page, casting it aside.

She's definitely in a full-blown stage of writer's block. She thought writing lyrics might help to clear her head a little, but all she's managed to come up with so far is some cryptic shit about Effy. It's not terrible, but it's not great either. And she knows she doesn't want to let the others down, because they could really do with some new material. As Cook's said before, _"You're the fuckin' Van Gogh out of us, Blondie – so do me proud and write us a fuckin' masterpiece!"_

'Blondie' had failed to tell Cook that Van Gogh was in fact an artist and not a writer – he wouldn't really know the difference either way. But despite this, the message was clear. And she knew it meant her sorting her head out, and fast.

She sighs again and looks around. It's about afternoon now, and students are bustling back into the arts block after lunch. She's been in the library all morning, but came out for a break; she's now sitting on a sofa in the middle of the noisy space. She scowls in frustration. Figures now's as good a time as any to get back to work, since writing is no longer an option. That in mind, she's about to get to her feet when she feels the cushion next to her shift.

"Hi".

Her body seizes. She'd know that husky voice anywhere – has been replaying it in her head repeatedly for seven days straight. Turns her head slowly – very very slowly – to the left. Big brown eyes stare back at her, still just as sparkling as when she last saw them. Pink, full lips are stretched into a genuine, friendly smile. The scowl on Naomi's face lessens without her consent.

"Hey, Emily" she says tentatively after a few seconds. She returns the smile. Her hair is dry now, but some strands have broken loose of her pony. She brushes them back from her face self-consciously, abruptly regretting not blowdrying her hair this morning. "How are you?"

The redhead shrugs and bites her lip. "Okay, I guess". She pauses. "You?"

Naomi looks at her hands in her lap. "Yeah, I'm okay too" she murmurs. Then grins widely. "Haven't managed to crash into anyone else, anyway" she says evenly. She hears a throaty, melodic laugh and looks back up. Emily's eyes are closed and she's shaking her head, but she's still giggling.

"Good to know. Me neither" she says eventually, stilling her laughter.

Naomi scoffs lightly. Then spots Emily's bag lying haphazardly beside her. Sees some large books poking out of it. "How are you finding everything?" she finds herself asking, tone serious now.

Emily hesitates, clearly contemplating. "It's good" she decides on. "I'm really enjoying university. Nothing like sixth form. But it's just getting my head around assignments and stuff that's really stressing me out, you know?"

Naomi nods. Knows all too well how difficult it is to cope initially. "You get used to it" she says simply, and leaves it at that. Emily smiles politely in reply and then glances away. Silence falls between them, and Naomi finds herself looking at Emily out of the corner of her eye. Like, _really _looking at her. She's dressed in jeans and a casual jade green jumper. Her hair is lightly curled today, leaving red strands to hang in loose ringlets around her face. She's wearing a taupe shade of eye shadow, which brings out the shine in her eyes. Makes her look softer. Prettier. The observation makes Naomi feel increasingly uncomfortable. Her mouth feels dry again, and her nerve endings are jittery. Again, can't fathom why. She frowns. "Well, I suppose I better g–"

"Do you know where 'Samson' is?" Emily cuts in abruptly.

Naomi meets her gaze and tries not to shy away from her penetrating stare. "Sorry?"

Emily scoots closer and faces her. "'Samson' lecture theatre? My next class is there. You know it?"

Naomi hesitates. Vaguely registers the name in the back of her mind. Takes her a couple of moments to remember why. "Yeah, I do actually. I had a class there last year" she answers. "It's not here, though. It's in the building across from this one".

Emily nods. "Great" she says. Then she gets to her feet and strings her bag strap over her shoulder. Naomi tries not to look relieved. "Could you show me where it is?"

_Damn._ She bites her lip and averts her eyes. "Um, actually..."

Emily's staring at her again, and she feels her throat constrict on her excuse at once. Some odd part of her knows that Emily would be able read her lie straight away, and although the girl's face is impassive right now while she stares down at Naomi with those captivating eyes, the blonde doesn't want to be the one to cause her expression to change to one of disappointment.

She releases a sigh and smiles coyly. "Of course" she says. A flash of approval crosses Emily's face and the blonde gets to her feet. She spots her scrap paper still lying there last moment and grabs it hastily, shoving it into her bag. Would find it quite embarrassing if anyone were to read her drabble.

Emily and her walk wordlessly through the block, no light-hearted conversation passing between them. Naomi abruptly realizes that they must look more like two acquaintances walking beside one another rather than two friends. Disregards this thought. _We're not friends, twat, _she reminds herself sternly. But Emily breaks the silence when their feet come into contact with the concrete of the campus.

"English". Naomi glances sideways at her and raises her eyebrows. Silently implores the redhead to explain. Emily smirks. "You're studying English" she explains. Now Naomi finds her eyebrows lowering in confusion. Another thought registers.

"But...I never told you that" she says slowly.

Emily looks straight ahead of her, smirk still firmly in place. "I know. I guessed. I saw that poem you wrote – the one on that piece of paper beside you". _Fuck, _Naomi thinks in alarm. "It was really good" Emily continues without missing a beat; she doesn't give Naomi the chance to panic. Even before the blonde can react, Emily looks back at her. "Plus you've got that haughty, up-yourself attitude that English students tend to have. I hear they can be quite pretentious". Naomi bellows out a laugh. Christ. This girl was good.

"Great" Naomi says sarcastically in between laughs. She's still grinning nonetheless.

But then Emily's smirk softens to a smile. "Seriously, though. The poem was really clever. Personal. You should be a writer" she says sincerely. Naomi feels her stomach flutter, just like last week. She pushes it down. Ignores it.

"Thank you" she replies quietly, abashed. "It...it wasn't a poem actually. They were lyrics. For a song". They're approaching the designated building now; it's Emily's turn to raise her eyebrows while Naomi's holding the door open for her.

"You're a musician?"

Naomi nods sheepishly. "Kind of...I play in a band. Guitar, mainly. I was trying to clear my head and come up with some new stuff at the same time". They walk into the entrance hall. "Don't think it worked out too well, though". They walk up the stairs and Naomi knows they're nearing their destination. Feels oddly disheartened by the fact. Although she would've been happy to have been rid of her freshman companion a few minutes ago, that wasn't the case now; she's realized since then that Emily's company isn't actually too bad. Nice, even.

She eyes the redhead, whose expression is thoughtful. "Well, I'd love to hear something sometime". They come to a stop outside a door. It's sign reads 'Samson'.

"End of the line" Naomi says unnecessarily. Emily nods and brushes a curl away from her face. As her hand moves, blue eyes focus on it. She's wearing two silver rings. They look pretty. Pretty on her.

"Cheers, Naomi" says Emily earnestly. Then she opens the door and walks in. A thought suddenly occurs to the blonde.

"Wait" she says urgently before the girl disappears. Emily glances over her shoulder. "You never told me what _you_ were doing" she says.

Emily winks. "You never asked" she replies slyly, then shuts the door. Naomi stares at the blank wood for a moment or so, smiling to herself. Turns around and heads back through the building. Maybe she'll head back to the library. Or try and write more songs; she suddenly feels more inspired. The wind greets her with its chilly caress once she steps back outside, but then her phone interrupts her daydreaming. She pulls it out, sees a message from Eff.

_Later ;-)_

Naomi stares at it. Her brow creases. Then a vague recollection drifts into her mind from this morning. _"I'll text you later, Naomi". _She pauses, then can't help in giggling quietly to herself. Finds her previous despondency dissipating altogether as she continues to walk. Can't decide whether it's because of Emily or Effy. Or both. Her eyes lift up toward the sky. A swallow flies by. Strong, determined, carefree. Naomi smiles thoughtfully and returns her phone to her bag.

.


	3. Yellow

.

"Freds, keep up will ya? You're falling way behind on the riff. Naomi, you're going way too fast. Try to wind it up, yeah? And you, Eff...are you even paying any fuckin' attention at all?"

Naomi watches indifferently while Cook continues to lecture them all; his expression is stern while he hovers half-off his stool, but his stare is directed mainly towards Effy. The brunette's face remains vacant despite Cook's glare, and Naomi knows from past experience that the girl must be off in the midst of her own little world.

Freddie's positioned directly opposite her with his bass hanging from a strap around his neck. She watches whilst his fingers dance absentmindedly across the neck of the instrument, but then her eyes flicker upwards. They lock gazes and he jerks his head in Cook's direction. She smiles when he winks.

"Effy?" Cook says again, his tone aggravated now.

Effy must vaguely register his voice then, because she turns her head slowly in his direction. "Yes, Cook?" she says apathetically.

Naomi observes as Cook's jaw hardens. Then he looks away from Effy. "Listen up you lot" he says in a strangely even voice. Naomi glances at Effy, who still appears unconcerned by the shift in atmosphere. She sees the brunette's slender fingers idly flit across her keys. "We've got two days till this next gig, alrigh'? Two _fucking _days. Our last one fell to shit, and if we're going anywhere with this band then we've gotta start taking this fuckin' seriously, yeah?"

Nobody answers initially. Naomi looks down and pretends to fiddle with her tuning pegs instead. "Since when do you take things seriously, Cook? Everything's always a joke to you" says Effy matter-of-factly. Nonchalantly. Naomi feels her adrenaline spike and sure enough when she looks up it's to see Cook now standing completely rigid. His fists are clenched to white and his jaw is locked.

"I'm taking a break" he says tightly, before marching out from behind his drumkit and storming outside. The others watch him wordlessly until the door bangs shut, but then Naomi releases a sigh.

"You've gotta stop pissing him off, Eff. We'll be down a drummer if you keep this up" says Naomi despondently. She pulls her guitar strap off over her head and places it back on its stand. Then goes and plonks herself on the dirty leather couch at the back of the garage.

Freddie's gangly form joins her on the couch a moment later. "Relax Naomi. This gig will be fine. Don't listen to what Cook says. We're good, I know we're good". Naomi glances sideways at him. His expression is endearingly optimistic; it holds no lie. It causes the blonde to smile in spite of herself. She reaches out to ruffle his hair.

"I hope so" she says, returning the hand to her lap. "I dunno why he's getting so worked up though. I can't remember the last time I've seen him like this". Naomi's gaze diverts to Effy then, because the girl is slinking over to them. She comes to a stop just in front of them but doesn't sit down. Doesn't offer any input to the conversation either.

Freddie shrugs. "Me neither" he says. "He's just a bit tetchy. He might not say so, but this whole thing means a lot to him. Keeps him occupied". Naomi stares at Freddie again in surprise. His sentence had been said in such a blasé way that she has to wonder whether or not he'd been joking. No such luck; her eyes are met with him staring off into space contemplatively.

She looks back up at Effy. Those sharp blue eyes are flickering between the both of them, but eventually come to settle on Naomi. "He's right" she simply says, taking out her cigarette pack from her breast pocket. She takes out a pre-rolled spliff and lights it. Takes a long, smooth drag before passing it to Naomi. Their fingers touch during the exchange, glide against one another. Naomi meets her eye. An imperceptible glint is residing there just as Naomi pulls away and goes to take a lengthy drag. The blonde represses a smirk.

"'Spose we'll just have to work harder then, eh?" she murmurs, lowering the spliff. The question is said at large, yet the blonde only stares at Effy. Then her eyebrow cocks up. Effy chews on her lip, chapped with the cold. It's Freddie who answers.

"Yeah, I guess" he says, stifling a yawn. She looks around and passes him the spliff. They sit there silently for a few minutes and continually pass the joint around, the only noise being their exhalations. Eventually they hear a shuffling noise from outside the door. Sure enough, Cook waltzes in; Naomi can immediately tell that he's calmed down by his relaxed posture.

The boy eyes them all for a moment. Then his gaze settles on Freddie. "Give us some of that, mate" Cook says, holding out his hand. Freddie takes a quick toke and hands Cook the spliff. He takes a long, drawn-out inhalation of it. It's almost unnecessary. But then he sighs and looks to his feet. "Sorry about before, guys. I just...I really think we can do summit this time, y'know? Make some fuckin' money, get us on our feet and out of those shit-arse pubs we're always playing in. Whaddya reckon?"

Again, nothing's said at first. Naomi tries to catch Effy's eye, but the brunette almost seems to have become indifferent again. Instead, the blonde gets to her feet and plucks the spliff from Cook's lips. "I reckon we should get back to work" she plainly says, then takes a quick drag. Cook grins just before she turns around to face Effy.

"Atta girl Naomikins! C'mon Freds, we've got to practice that riff again".

Naomi hears the boys shuffle off behind her, but she's facing Effy now. The brunette is staring at her questioningly, her lips pulled up into a slight smirk. The blonde holds her gaze, then takes an over exaggerated toke. She puffs the smoke directly into Effy's face; the brunette tilts her head to inhale it through her nose. Then, unexpectedly, Effy leans forward and presses her lips firmly to Naomi's. Urgently. Naomi closes her eyes. Opens her mouth. Hot, wanting. Their tongues meet and the blonde begins to drown in the combined rush of both chemicals and feelings throughout her system – drugs, lust, excitement. But then she finds herself flinching; a brief flash of red blazes behind her eyelids and causes her to jerk away. She opens her eyes, slightly shell-shocked, to find Effy still smirking at her in amusement. The joint is in her hand now. It's almost down to ash by this point. Naomi's not entirely sure how she didn't register the brunette taking it.

Effy drops the butt of the spliff. It's unsalvageable now. "C'mon, Naomikins" she mumbles in a poor imitation of Cook's voice. The blonde smiles with difficulty. She's spotted that red poster again over Effy's shoulder. It's hanging directly behind her on the wall. It adds to the dull tone of red still pulsing behind her lids. But then Effy moves, luckily, and Naomi is snapped back to the present. She follows her back to their makeshift stage. The brunette takes her place behind the keyboard and Naomi walks past her towards her guitar. Brushes her hand against Effy's on the way. She pulls her strap back over her head and looks over at Cook, who's twirling his drumstick dexterously between his fingers.

"Okay lads, let's take this from the top" he instructs. "One, two..."

.

She exhales a spew of smoke, making sure to keep her expression unchanged whilst she utters her next words. "Cook, this is bollocks".

Cook chuckles darkly and she glances sideways at him. He's in the middle of taking a drag of his own cigarette. His brow is furrowed. When he lowers the fag, he doesn't turn to look at her. "If we wanna get noticed, we've got to make the effort. We've gotta be friendly. Fuckin' hell Naomi, sometimes I think Effy's effect on you has been for the worse". Naomi doesn't know how to reply to that. She takes another drag instead.

"Maybe. But can't we just hang up posters or something? I feel like a knob going around with all these fliers". She gestures unenthusiastically to the fliers by her feet. Her bag is acting as a makeshift paperweight on them.

She sees him shrug. "Suck it up then. 'Sides, there aren't that many left. Then ya can go right back to being an unsocial butterfly". He chuckles again, and Naomi cracks a smile. She knows it's supposed to be a joke, but secretly she's relieved at the promise in his words.

She puts out the rest of her fag on the wall behind her. Then steps away from it and shrugs her jacket closer around her shoulders. Pulls her beanie down further. "C'mon then, let's get going. I'm holding you to your word" she says wryly. Cook merely cocks his head to one side, appraises her, then copies her actions and puts out his cigarette. They throw the butts into a nearby waste bin before grabbing their stuff and heading off again.

Naomi keeps quiet on the complaining front from then on; they manage to continue on for another half an hour, smiling and chatting with prospective gig-goers and handing them fliers. They'd decided to hand them out around Goldsmiths, Naomi's uni, because it has the kind of audience they're pertaining to. Cook doesn't even attend college; he works not too far away in Brockley, in his uncle Keith's pub. He'd never been the academic type, never had the drive for it. Hence why it came as an initial surprise to Naomi that the boy became so committed to the band. He's usually a joker, a complete lad. But Freddie had been right earlier – this did mean a lot to Cook. It was something to motivate him. Something to keep him busy and fulfilled. It's this – her deep respect for Cook, their oddly functional friendship – more than anything, which propels her to be uncharacteristically friendly right now. That is until the mood decides to take an unexpected shift.

"How are you and Eff doing, anyway?"

Naomi falters. She had literally just finished conversing with a politics student, trying to persuade him to come to the gig, and was watching him walk off when Cook asked his question. It brings her up short. She revolves around slowly and narrows her eyes at Cook. His expression is utterly serious. Even mildly curious.

She chews on her lip. "I don't know" she casually murmurs, shrugging. Two girls pass by and the blonde hastily hands them a flier each. Cook's still watching her, his eyebrow cocked, when she looks back at him. She sighs. "I never really know how we are, alright? We're not about that" she continues. "It's...it's not a bad thing. It means we can kind of...do our own thing. We don't get strung up over each other, we don't get too attached. Yet we still come back to one another at the end of the day". She looks down to the remaining papers in her hands. There's only a handful left now.

Cook makes an indistinguishable sound. She glances up to see that he's rubbing his forehead, deep in thought. Then he squarely meets her eye. "Is that what you want?" he asks carefully.

She hesitates. Again, he's presented her with a statement that she finds difficult to answer. Fucking hell, since when did Cook know exactly which buttons to press? She thinks about it for a long time – so much so that, in her distraction, she fails to pass out more fliers to some students that walk by. Eventually she sets herself. "Yes" she replies in an unwavering voice. She can see straight away that he's not convinced, but she doesn't care. "I don't need somebody hanging off me, Cook. I'm not like that. I never have been. Me and Eff...it just works, okay? And as far as I can tell it seems to work for her too". She's dismayed to find that her tone grows defensive towards the latter part of her speech, but Cook doesn't hold it against her.

He shakes his head, his expression conflicted. "I know you're not like that babe. Trust me, I do. And if anyone knows what Eff's like, it's me" he says, his tone slightly apologetic. She eyes him quizzically. Abruptly realizes the significance of his last sentence when she looks him in the eye. Really looks. The feelings he had for Effy; the turmoil she put him through; the games that only ended up with losers, not winners...it's all spelt out in his sudden hangdog expression. She's about to address this, her stance softening, but it looks like Cook's 'Agony Aunt' role hasn't fizzled out just yet. "I see the way you guys are together. Saw it earlier, during practice. But just because Effy's all cryptic and dark and emotionless and shit, doesn't mean _you_ have to be Naomikins. I know you, more than you think babe, and I know that you're more than just a hard, sarcastic bitch–", he shrugs off her indignant snort of protest, "–and I...I just don't want to see ya getting hurt, alrigh'? Just...that's all Cookie has to say". He falls silent then, and Naomi is literally struck dumb. She's torn between feeling offended and feeling touched. The latter seems to be winning out, but Cook doesn't appear to want to listen to Naomi's response – he jumps right back into his role as jack the lad, pouncing on some unexpecting fresher girls and waving fliers in their faces.

She takes his momentary distraction as a chance to reflect over his words. Hurt? Why would she get hurt? This was_ her_ life, _her_ conscious decision...it wasn't Cook's problem to be worrying about. She groans. This is why she keeps the 'friend' thing to a bare minimum. Friends mean attachment. Friends mean emotion. Being personal. Her and Effy's relationship was their business. Not Cook's. They'd been seeing each other – if that's what you'd like to call it – for many months now, and she was more than capable of watching out for herself in that respect.

A soft smile colours her face after a moment. _Nice to know that he cares, though,_ she thinks soberly.

She has a feeling that the subject's been dropped, thankfully, so turns around to rejoin Cook. Is surprised to find that he's wandered off somewhere. She growls. _I swear, if he's ditched me for those freshers I'll have his fucking balls, _she thinks angrily, her previous fondness dissipating altogether. She glances around for any indication of where he might have disappeared off to when her gaze falls upon a lone flier, clearly left behind by her mate. She approaches it, a strange Hanzel and Gretel feeling washing over her, and sure enough she spots Cook not too far away from where it is. Except she suddenly wishes she hadn't bothered following him, because she's also spotted who he's talking to.

Emily. Emily with her charcoal grey doc martens and skinny jeans. Emily with her oversized cardigan, billowing top and long-chained necklace. Emily with her impish grin and messily plaited red hair. Naomi feels a dull thud in her stomach while she watches the girl talking to her friend. She wants to get out of there, Cook or no Cook. Is about to do so when Cook – with horribly impeccable timing – glances over his shoulder and spots the blonde standing there, rooted to the spot.

He grins widely. "Oy Naomi, babe! C'mere!" he calls out eagerly. Her face contorts and she physically has to keep herself from screaming "fuck" out loud. Quickly rearranges her expression just as Emily looks her way. Even from here Naomi can see a gentle smile appear on the redhead's face. Finds it both endearing and aggravating at the same time. She stiffly walks over to where the two of them are standing.

"Hey" she mumbles almost inaudibly, more-so to her boots. Only looks up again when Cook speaks.

"I was just telling this girl 'ere about the gig on Friday and she can't wait to come, can ya princess?" he says lightheartedly. Naomi scoffs and looks at Emily. Expects to hear a bout of denial from the girl, but instead is met with an amused expression. It throws her off.

"Sure, why not? I'm always up for a good gig" the redhead says genuinely. She locks eyes with Naomi. Brown and blue. "Are you going, Naomi?" she asks next.

The blonde hesitates. Adjusts her beanie because her ears suddenly feel quite warm. "Well, I, uh..."

"You two already know each other? Quality!" interrupts Cook enthusiastically. "You're in for a treat then, red, 'cause Naomikins here is our guitarist". His face is in danger of splitting in half from his toothy grin. Naomi represses a groan – _shut the fuck up Cook – _and manages to glimpse the look of comprehension that swims over Emily's face.

"_Oh..._so _this _is the band you're in" she says knowingly, gesturing to the flier Cook had given her. Naomi bites her lip. Observes as Emily suddenly takes more interest in the flier, running her eyes across it. Notices a fleck of yellow on the girl's cheek, and wonders what it's from. But then Emily looks back up. "Silverflux? Is that your name?" she asks the both of them. They both nod, except Cook's is fervent whereas Naomi's is lacklustre. An imperceptible smirk tugs at Emily's lips. It rubs Naomi the wrong way for some reason. Makes her feel judged. She doesn't like it.

Cook speaks again before she can say something she shouldn't. "Well babe, I hope to see your pretty lil' face in the crowd on Friday night. Me and Campbell better get going now, though. Places to go, people to influence. Ya know the like". Cook stares expectantly at Emily. Perhaps for a goodbye of some sort, but he doesn't get one. Instead he gets to watch as Emily's eyes narrow. It's physically possible to see the cogs turning in her brain, and in no time at all her brown eyes widen. Naomi knows all too well what's going through her mind; she'd wrenched her eyes shut herself whilst Cook was rattling on.

Emily's lips curl up into a disbelieving smile. "Campbell?" she says, the incredulity evident in her husky voice. She brushes back some loose red strands from her face. "As in, _Naomi Campbell?_"

Naomi groans. Loud. Feels a surge of anger and embarrassment rise up within her. "Yes, as in the famous supermodel. I was just the unfortunate victim when my mother named me. And before you go asking, no _–_ I have never thrown a phone at somebody. So save your laughter for someone else, it's honestly old news by this stage". The blonde lets out a huff at the end of her little tirade. Crosses her arms defensively and looks down, suddenly finding the scuff marks at the top of her boots very interesting.

"No phones, Blondie. But ya _did _throw a beer bottle at me once, when ya were smashed. Nearly got me with it too. She's feisty this one, eh red?"

Naomi glances up at Cook's admission. He's chuckling awkwardly, his eyes hurriedly flitting back and forth between Emily and herself. Naomi's gaze shoots to Emily again, and she feels her stomach and throat clench upon doing so. Emily looks indignant. Hurt, even. Her pink lips are pursed into a tight line and her eyes are hard. "I wasn't going to laugh" she says tightly. Her tone is raspy now, rather than husky. "It's surprising. A bit of a coincidence, yeah. But I would never laugh. It's a nice name. It suits you". Naomi feels her heart momentarily stall. Her anger subsides instantly. She feels remorseful, guilty. She's had people say that before _–_ that they weren't laughing _–_ but it had always been said in between giggles. She's had to answer to it all her life. Makes her feel defensive whenever the subject's brought up again. But somehow...the blonde knows Emily's not lying. Senses that the redhead is hurt by her accusation. Makes her feel awful. Ashamed.

"I'm sorry" she blurts out abruptly. She has no doubt that her expression is contorted with regret. Suddenly realizes that that dull red tinge behind her eyelids has returned.

The redhead eyeballs her for a moment. Considers her. Cook attempts to alleviate the tense situation once more. "Well, I think we now know that Naomi's definitely got the temper of her namesake" he says lightly. He eyes Emily then. "What 'bout you, red? What's your name?"

Emily looks at him. Stares vacantly at him for a moment, before her cold expression is broken by a sincere smile. "Emily" she says. Her eyes flicker to Naomi, the heat now back in them. "Emily Fitch".

One of Naomi's eyebrows shoots up. She meets the redhead's daring gaze. Challenges it. _Fitch, eh? _she ponders to herself. She stews over this revelation for a moment. Eventually decides that it's okay, the name. It has a ring to it. Emily Fitch. She suppresses a smile.

"Righ', Emilio. I'm Cook" says her friend suddenly. He claps his hands together. "Make sure to find me or Naomi at the gig. It's gonna be fuckin' mental!" He bellows the last part, his eyes flashing wildly. Then he starts walking off, laughing loudly to himself. "Let's go Blondie!" he calls a few seconds later, beckoning Naomi over with his hand. The blonde looks back at Emily and smiles awkwardly. Tugs at her beanie again.

"Um...so, yeah. It should be good, I guess" she murmurs unconvincingly. She tries not to let out a nervous laugh at the amused look that crosses Emily's face. Tries not to mull over that fleck of yellow still on her cheek. "See you then, maybe" she adds quietly, frowning. She gives Emily a feeble wave of goodbye and turns around, wanting nothing more than to be shot of the redhead. She can't explain it, but she feels utterly embarrassed from their encounter. Thinks she acted like a knob. Except then she broods over this notion. Ends up confused as to why she even cares what Emily thinks at all.

"Definitely" she unexpectedly hears from behind her. Glances around just in time to see Emily beaming in her direction, before the redhead turns to walk the opposite way to her. The blonde scoffs quietly. Feels oddly pleased with herself when she finally reaches Cook's side. She only has two fliers left in her hand now. Job done.

"So, Emily yeah?" her friend says after a while as they walk back towards the warmth of the arts block. She glances sideways at him and her eyes are met by a lecherous look on his face. "Cor, wouldn't mind me some of that" he bluntly finishes. Naomi scrunches up her brow. Feels strangely irked by Cook's statement. Probably from the disgust over him referring to a girl in such a way.

"Shut up Cook" she admonishes him. He simply chortles loudly and shrugs, and abruptly Naomi finds herself hoping that Emily doesn't make it on Friday night.

.

* * *

.

_People who read my last story will know that I'm a bit of a Neffy whore. I thought I'd take them one step farther in this story, since I've only seen them paired up in literally one or two fics. Figured it might be a bit of an interesting challenge to pair them. I like them and their dynamic as a couple, and a few of you already seem to understand why I've put them together. I completely understand others' scepticism though. Nevertheless, for those of you confused by their 'relationship' so far: Good. For those of you who are even more confused about Naomi's opinion about/feelings for Emily: Even better..._

_Hope you enjoyed this one. Review?_


	4. Ignition

.

Her azure blue eyes flicker around the crowd once again in a feeble attempt to make sense of the numbers. Her fingertips are shaking slightly while she turns her pegs, trying to adjust the tuning of her guitar. Sweat beads start to appear on her forehead. She swipes at them fiercely. Lets out a long sigh.

Nervous. She's nervous. Jittery. This is all new to her. She's used to playing to old geezers or smelly rockers ordinarily, and they never paid much attention to their sound either way. Their band either could've been completely awesome or made a hundred mistakes during their performances back then, yet those old fuckers would still go about laughing and slugging down their drinks barely batting an eyelid. But this...this is a proper crowd. Students. Late teens, early twenties at most. Hell, she's positive she can even see a guy from one of her classes in the middle of the crowd.

Cook's 'get noticed' plan had obviously worked – this is the biggest crowd they've ever had. And that was saying something, since they were only playing in a dingy little college club – people were squashing together to make room. Nevertheless, something in the back of her mind told her that her and her bandmates would not be let off with being lazy with an audience like this. This was a Friday night for Christ's sake, and the last thing a bunch of students want to do on a Friday night is to listen to a shitty new band. There is no room for failure here. _Fucking brilliant, _the blonde thinks dejectedly to herself. She looks back down at her guitar. Tries to take her mind off things. Swallows down a lump in her throat and sighs loudly again.

"You ready for this?" she hears from nearby. Glances up. Freddie's staring at her with concern etched into his handsome features, even whilst his agile fingers are thudding along the neck of his bass absentmindedly.

She attempts a smile. Probably turns out to be more of a grimace. "No" she answers honestly. Then chuckles. "But when am I ever going to be?" she says.

Freddie grins. "Exactly" he says enthusiastically. "Besides, the minute you start getting used to this sort of stuff, then you know it's getting boring. The excitement makes it fun" he says matter-of-factly.

She raises an eyebrow. "You seem to know a lot about this sort of thing, Freds" she says in a mocking tone.

He shrugs, his grin widening. He thumbs through a few notes, the sound reverberating out of the amp at his side. "What can I say? It's a gift" he plainly says. She laughs loudly and shakes her head. Then she plucks through a few notes of her own and listens to the resulting sound. It comes out strongly. Her guitar's tuned.

No more than a few seconds later however, she hears an even louder sound rip through the crowd. Looks around again to see Cook's sandy hair bobbing through the crowd. One glimpse of his face tells her that he's already tipsy. She rolls her eyes. So much for his spell of professionalism during the week.

"Oy oy everybody!" she hears him shout. He waves his arms around madly and people turn in his direction as he passes through. Their expressions become either amused or aggravated. Naomi smirks. _Nothing new there, _she thinks. He manages to stumble his way towards the stage, but not before grabbing some poor girl's arse on the way. He narrowly misses a slap to the face and swiftly jumps onto the stage. "So Naomikins, what I tell ya? Did we make an impression with our lil' fliers or wha'?" he asks as he throws an arm around her shoulder and leans his face close to hers. His breath stinks of beer.

"Cook, this isn't exactly the time to be getting drunk" she admonishes him, pulling back slightly with a grimace.

He shrugs and steps back. "I just had two lagers, babe. No big. Now let's go make this a fuckin' ace show, yeah?" he says dismissively, before stumbling towards his kit. She observes as he barely makes it onto his stool and thumps out a few beats with his drumsticks. Shakes her head. Cook never was one to follow the rules. As long as he doesn't pass out during their performance, they should be fine.

A few more minutes pass by and it's fast approaching the time they're meant to start. Of course, Effy isn't on stage yet. _Figures, _she thinks, although with a smirk rather than a frown. Effy Stonem never was one to follow the rules either – she always liked to make a fashionably late entrance. Slinking onstage with unrivalled grace. Where all eyes would instantly flicker to her. Naomi couldn't blame the owners of those eyes...because her own blue ones will no doubt be doing the exact same thing.

"Naomi!" she hears suddenly, snapping her out of her Effy-haze at once. Her gaze shoots around the crowd once more until her attention zones in on a blaze of crimson red hair. Emily's beaming face is staring up at her from around the fourth or fifth row, and one fact hits the blonde squarely in the stomach. _She's here, _she thinks in disbelief. She'd been hoping that the redhead wouldn't end up coming to the gig, but now that she's here Naomi can't help in feeling inexplicably happy. So much so that she immediately pulls her strap over her head and sets her instrument aside, before hopping down from the stage and into the crowd. She pushes into the throng and soon comes face to face with her freshman acquaintance. Finds herself smiling at the familiar sparkle in Emily's brown eyes.

"Hi, Emily" she murmurs. She runs a hand through her long peroxide blonde hair. Then pauses. "You came" she blurts out. Emily giggles, and the husky notes of her laughter drown out the chatter around them.

"Yeah, I did" she says, gesturing ineptly down at herself. Naomi can't help but look. She's wearing tight black jeggings and a long, dressy top. Her hair is half-scooped up, and her cheeks shimmer with a pale blush. Her lips are full and tinted with a cherry colour today. Naomi's mouth feels dry again. She awkwardly tugs at the hem of her t-shirt.

"Um...so..." she starts, but doesn't really know what to say. Her mind's gone blank. "How, uh...are you?" she ends up on instead. Her cheeks feel hot all of a sudden, and Emily's sharp eyes aren't helping in simmering down her blush.

The redhead begins to twirl some of her hair between her fingers. "Good" she replies calmly. A soft smile appears on her face. "Glad it's the weekend. Speaking of which, you lot better be good. I don't want to have wasted my Friday night on you if you're shit" she says jokingly, winking.

Naomi grins and laughs. Doesn't know where this sudden giddiness has come from. Goes with it instead of fighting it for once."We'll try our best" she simply replies. Silence befalls them, and the buzz of noise surrounding them returns to Naomi's ears. She doesn't want to hear it. Finds she only wants to hear Emily. "So...first year still going okay?" she asks next, glancing up through her eyelashes.

The redhead shrugs. "It's better this week, I guess. Kind of getting used to it. What about you? How's second year?"

Naomi contemplates. "Yeah, it's okay. Lot of assignments, but–"

"Naomi!" she hears again, only this time it's not the voice she wants to hear. She glances around agitatedly. Sees Cook frantically beckoning her back onstage with a jerky hand. Is surprised to find that Effy is standing at his shoulder. The blonde didn't even notice her arrival.

She looks back to Emily, her expression apologetic. "Well, this is me" she says, throwing a thumb back in the direction of the stage. "Hope we don't suck" she says mischievously, winking.

Emily laughs heartily and offers a small wave. The blonde whirls around and heads back towards the stand, but not before hearing a husky "good luck" come from behind her. She reaches the edge of the stage and jumps back up. Then swiftly takes her place and picks up her guitar, stringing the strap back around herself. Glances towards Effy, who's positioned behind her keyboard at the front of the stage, and is surprised to see the brunette already staring at her with narrowed, pale blue eyes.

"Good evening everybody!" bellows Cook suddenly, snapping her from her abrupt confusion. She looks towards him; he's speaking into a microphone at the front of the stage, right next to Effy. Naomi and the others always leave the introductory stuff to him. He's the better showman. "How we all doin' tonight?" he shouts into the mic. He gets a few murmurings in reply from the crowd. Naomi grins when he shakes his head in an over exaggerated fashion. "Aw c'mere now, don't take the piss out of me 'ere. That was fuckin' awful!" he shouts and a few audience members laugh. "Now really, let's try again shall we? I said: how we all doin' tonight?" he repeats, this time much louder. This time the crowd roars in reply, a few whoops and catcalls sneaking in as well.

"Excellent!" Cook says once the cheers subside. "Righ' then, now that that's outta the way, allow me to introduce myself. I'm James Cook – better known as the Cookie Monster, eh ladies?" Naomi can't see his face from where she's standing, but she's pretty sure Cook wiggles his eyebrows at that moment. Her assumption is confirmed when a collective noise of disgust – noticeably female sounding – comes from the crowd. "Uh, yeah" he continues on regardless. "And this here is 'Silverflux'". He gestures offhandedly behind him now and Naomi grins even wider. Sees Freddie wave out of the corner of her eye and Effy remain as impassive and stoic as ever. "We're gonna play a few songs for ya tonight. So have fun, get pissed, and let's go fuckin' mental!" he bellows again, and jumps back from the mic just as the crowd erupts in cheers.

Cook quickly takes his place behind his drumkit and Naomi gets ready to start their first track. Acutely watches as Effy positions herself, with her supple lips hovering in front of her microphone and her slender fingers poised to press down on her keys. The sight sends a ripple of lust and excitement up Naomi's spine. The buzzing atmosphere has well and truly gotten to her, and now she's actually looking forward to playing. She waits in anticipation for Effy to sound out the first note, to which the rest of them will follow. This happens a moment or so later, when Effy presses down and her whispery voice travels through the mic and reverberates out through the speakers. Immediately, as Naomi follows through with her own chords, she can see that the crowd's captivated. She smiles to herself.

Effy is their secret weapon – an otherworldly power to which audience members' resistance proves no match. Her eerie vocals have the ability to wrap themselves around you and alight every one of your senses until you have no choice but to pay attention. Add that to the way she moves onstage – with her unhindered swaying and swirling and rocking – and almost every person is lost to her presence. And as they continue through the first song, that's exactly what's happening. Every head is turned in Effy's direction, with wide and astonished eyes watching her every move and pricked ears processing every dreamy vocal. Whilst this is happening, Naomi begins to lose herself in the moment and the music. She even closes her eyes at some point. Let's her fingers work of their own accord and her body sway to the beats they all produce together. Cook's drums thump out a rhythmic yet resounding beat coinciding with the brunette's purring vocals and piercing synth notes. Freddie's bass echoes off the girl's words, adding depth and pressure. And the blonde's electric guitar adds a sound that wraps itself around the synth, tying the whole thing together so that they all become a well-oiled machine.

An unstoppable force.

As the set continues, Naomi glances repeatedly around the crowd and can see that they have them clenched in the palms of their hands. 'Silverflux' don't exactly have a set genre. If she were to pinpoint it, she'd probably assume it were somewhere between indie and alternative rock. But some of their songs are so different from one another that they really couldn't go about putting a label on things. And the crowd seemed to be appreciating so too – by about the fifth song, she's amazed to see people bouncing along to their speedier tempo, where Effy's voice takes on a world of it's own once more and morphs into something deep and piercing and almost grungy.

She herself continues to become absorbed by the beat; she draws out her riffs for as long as possible and holds the audience captive with her chords. She locks eyes with Freddie, who's happily fingering away at his bass opposite her, and he beams widely and throws her a wink. She can immediately tell what he's trying to say with his shining, knowing brown eyes. _Told you. _And he's right. This _is_ exciting. This _is_ fun. She can't even remember why she was nervous in the first place. Almost finds herself sad when they start into their final song-piece, because she's now utterly immersed herself in the vibes of the invigorated crowd.

Freddie's bass notes continuously travel up up her feet and wrack her body. It lulls her. Allows the blonde to submerge herself in her own world again and flutter her eyelids closed. There's red to greet her as she lets the rhythm wash over her. She enjoys it here, this world. Nothing can get at her, hurt her here. But when she opens her eyes again towards the latter part of the song, her gaze automatically seeks out Effy. The brunette's frame is still half-curved towards her mic while she rasps out her words; this final track is more subdued, designed to lull the listener toward a dreamy end. Her hair is knotted and slightly frizzy because of the heat around the room, but she looks entirely focused on playing to the crowd. Naomi smiles to herself and continues to watch her, admiring of the girl's drive to perform. After a few moments however, she can tell that something's off. She's confused to see that the girl's gaze isn't wavering at all. It's as if her pale, empyreal blue eyes are fixed on a single point in the crowd.

Naomi follows Effy's gaze with trepidation, and it's not long before she spots what the brunette must be looking at. Like a shining beacon, Emily's flaming red hair draws her gaze in and holds her there. She's not beaming, like earlier, but instead her face expresses a quiet awe. And it's not Effy she's watching, like every other person surrounding her. Like every other person in the room. It's her. Emily's brown eyes are fixed completely on Naomi, and they're wider and brighter than the blonde's ever seen them.

And suddenly Naomi feels like a match has been lit underneath her and she's on fire where she stands.

.

"Y'know, I didn't want the name 'Silverflux' originally. I had my heart set on 'Shagfest' or 'The Pussylickers', but the other knobheads wouldn't listen. Said it wasn't exactly 'commercial'. Tragic...don't ya think, love?"

Naomi snorts and continues to watch Cook out of the corner of her eye. Her bandmate is further down from her at the bar, and is currently pressed into the side of some petite blonde bimbo, who's nodding fervently and eating up all the shit he's shoveling into her. _Poor girl, _Naomi thinks, but doesn't feel sorry for her for too long. It's clear by her skimpy top, exceedingly short skirt, provocative smile and suggestive demeanour that the girl screams 'groupie'. Naomi turns away before she gets to bear witness to Cook shoving his tongue down the bimbo's throat, which will no doubt happen sooner rather than later.

She casts her eyes around the room again. Watches as students chat away animatedly to each other and laugh, sipping their beverages. The high from the gig is still lingering over the room, causing everyone in it to remain in good spirits. She can't help but remain infected by it as well.

Their performance had been an unprecedented success. The place had erupted in cheers the moment they'd played their last notes, and continued long after they'd finished. She's never experienced anything like it. It's addictive, astounding. And it was at that moment – when her guitar had been hanging limply from her fingertips – that Naomi realized what Cook had been talking about all this time._ This_ is what they were doing. _This_ is who they were meant to be playing for. The energy, the buzz, the high. She loves it. Wants more.

The blonde takes another sip of her cider and looks around once more, only this time with purpose. She couldn't find Emily once they'd wrapped up. The redhead had disappeared amongst the vibrating, cheering crowd when she went to seek her out. She isn't sure if she's upset or relieved by the fact that she still can't find the girl even now. That fire she'd felt...she'd never felt anything like it. It was like all her nerve endings became disconnected all at once and left her incapable of any movement or thought. It even caused her to cock up on the song a bit, but she luckily regained herself before anyone took notice. She doesn't know how to feel about it. This unexplainable anxiety. It leaves her slightly frustrated and happy all at the same time.

Before she has time to mull over things further, she observes as several heads turn synchronically toward something. Sure enough, a moment later, Effy's ethereal figure emerges from a small bunch of people ahead of Naomi, their gazes following in her wake. She ignores them completely and makes a graceful beeline to where Naomi is standing paralyzed and mildly amused at the bar. "Hey there" she says in a sultry tone upon reaching Naomi's side. She leans into the blonde slightly, their hips side by side, and they lock eyes. Blue holding blue. "Come down yet?" she asks cryptically.

Naomi chuckles and takes a quick drink from her glass. "'Spose" she murmurs, brushing a hand through her blonde locks. "That was...really something, though" she admits in a hushed voice. An imperceptible smile pulls at Effy's pale lips.

"It's the high, Naomi. You'll get used to it" she says cockily, and Naomi suppresses a grin. Eyes the brunette shrewdly and sees that her appearance is meditative. Thoughtful. The blonde hesitates and puts her drink aside.

"You were...really amazing, Eff" she starts unsurely. "Like, fucking incredible–"

Her praise is cut off by the feeling of Effy's thin lips abruptly pressed against hers. Her initial surprise soon evaporates and she closes her eyes, kissing back with fervour and melting into their contact. Effy's hips are now pressed completely flush against hers and as a result the blonde is leaning further back against the bar. She takes their weight and uses it, gliding her hand along the flowy material of the brunette's shirt-dress and around to her back. Her fingers claw at Effy's spine through the fabric and the girl releases a contented moan into her mouth.

The blonde's about to deepen things when Effy draws back a little. Her eyelids open up again, lazily, and they're met with Effy's eyes staring back at her through hooded lids. There's an infinitesimal smirk tweaking at her lips, which Naomi can also see are coated with a sheen from her own lipgloss. She waits for Effy to say something, anything, but nothing happens. They merely stand there pressed against one another. Effy's fingers stroke along Naomi's collarbone, and they continue to remain unspeaking. When Naomi goes to break the silence however, Effy places a finger to her lips to shush her. The touch is light and feathery, and the blonde represses the urge to poke out her tongue and try to lick her lips.

"Let's dance" the brunette murmurs eventually, swooping a hand down and threading her fingers loosely through Naomi's. The blonde doesn't offer any complaint; she follows Effy by their interlinked hands to the middle of the room, where a couple of people have taken to dancing. Effy turns to her and loops her arms around Naomi's neck, drawing her in. Naomi's hands automatically find Effy' hips and her fingers wrap themselves in the fabric of her top. They begin to sway together, in sync, to the song playing overhead. It has a low, melodic beat. Naomi closes her eyes after a while. Submerges herself in the rhythm and leans her head forward. Burrows her face into Effy's neck and hair. Inhales deeply. The girl's scent travels up Naomi's nose. Sharp, heady, intoxicating. And the blonde abruptly realizes just then that she can't remember the last time they've done something like this. Be close, intimate. In public, no less. It's so simple – just dancing together – yet it stirs up old, untouched sensations in her. She wonders what's caused this sudden change in Effy. What's brought this on.

She doesn't have time to ponder over her curiosity though, because it's not long before she feels one of Effy's arms leave her shoulders and squeeze in between them instead. A few moments later, she feels the brunette pull back from their embrace. Naomi's eyes flit open at the rush of cold that hits her. Sees a flash of red in her periphery, but ignores it. Is about to question Effy about her sudden resistance, when she feels the girl's hot lips press against hers once more. Again she can't help but close her eyes and reciprocate, but after a couple of seconds she realizes what Effy's up to. As their tongues meet, Naomi's comes into contact with a foreign object. The brunette then forcefully pushes her tongue past Naomi's lips, allowing the little lump to pass into her mouth. Then she abruptly pulls back, and Naomi reflexively swallows whatever the lump was in her surprise. Her eyelids pop open and she's met with a smug looking Effy. She has a wild smirk on her face, and then she reaches her hand down to her jeans pocket. Pulls out a small, white pill and rolls it between her fingers, making sure to hold Naomi's inquisitive gaze all the while. Then she raises the pill to her lips and places it on her extended tongue, before knocking her head backwards. Her head rolls forward again a moment later, and upon glimpsing her empty mouth it's clear the pill is gone.

_Oh, _Naomi thinks to herself, dumbfounded, as the brunette winks slyly. Then the girl whirls around and disappears into the crowd again before Naomi has the chance to follow her. Once she gathers her bearings however, she realizes that she's been drugged. Snorts at the absurdity of it. Effy is always unpredictable, and that little stunt just proves it. Lucky for the blonde she's no stranger to recreational drugs. Figures there's nothing she can do about it now – might as well enjoy the multiple high, from both the drugs and the ambience.

She begins to walk in a random direction. Tries to find somebody she knows. Eventually sees Freddie talking to some Hispanic girl. Wanders over to him. "Hey Freddie" she greets him.

He drags his gaze away from the girl and looks at her. Then smiles genuinely. "Hey Naomi. How's it going?" he asks, placing a friendly hand on her shoulder.

Naomi shrugs. "Pretty good. Except Eff drugged me" she says, scoffing.

Freddie's eyes light up. "Really?" he asks excitedly. She nods. "Eff's got pills? Deadly! Where is she?" he asks. The blonde rolls her eyes and smirks. Shrugs again and points her finger around aimlessly. Her vision is blurring slightly – the pill's starting to kick in. "Well, let's go find her then" he decides. He turns to the girl at his side. "I'll be back in a minute babe, okay?" he says to her in a smooth voice. Predictably the girl bats her long, black eyelashes and nods. Naomi represses a laugh. She never fell for the Mclair charm, even when she first met him. He never struck her as her type, despite her being bi. Then again she isn't exactly sure what her type is anyway, so that doesn't help things.

"C'mon then loverboy" she says, pulling him by one of his long arms back through the club. They spend several minutes looking for the elusive brunette. Come up with nothing. Eventually deduce that she must be outside having a smoke or something. She's about to pull Freddie along with her in the direction of the exit when she sees someone else head towards it too. A grin unwillingly makes its way onto her face. "Emily! Hey, Emily!" she calls out, her voice slightly choked and croaky. Her vision swims before her again and she stumbles backwards into Freddie.

"Whoa, you okay there Naomi?" he asks with concern, his hand gripping her arm tightly.

She shakes her head, her sight shaking along with it. "Yeah yeah, I'm fine" she says dismissively. "You keep looking for Effy. I just need to go talk to somebody". He reluctantly nods and lets go of her. She staggers forward after the blaze of red, which is now dangerously close to disappearing out the door. "Hey, hey Emily!" she calls again. This time the redhead hears her; she whirls around, mere inches from the exit, and her brown eyes fall upon Naomi's disheveled form. A conflicted expression sweeps across her pixie face.

"Hey, Naomi" she says, her voice low. Naomi stops just in front of her, the red swimming slightly before her eyes. She can feel a goofy smile pull at her cheeks. Doesn't have the heart to mask it. The drugs have loosened her.

"Where have you been? I've been looking for you for ages!" she says excitedly.

Emily shrugs and bites at her cherry lips. "I've just been around, I guess. Ran into somebody I knew. Was off talking to them" she says, her tone somewhat clipped. Naomi feels her eyebrows furrow together. Suddenly takes more notice of Emily's distressed stance. Tries to disregard it.

"Uh, so...did you enjoy our performance?" she asks. Is abashed to find that her tone is self-conscious. Glimpses a flash of heat cross Emily's brown eyes for a split second, before they harden again.

"Yeah, you...you guys were really good" she says, her tone unreadable.

Naomi chuckles to herself and steps toward her. Fails to notice the redhead tense slightly. "Guess we didn't suck then, huh? God, I'll tell ya Emily...I've never felt like that before. That gig was just so unbelievable. I mean, the crowd was–"

"Yeah, great" the girl interrupts, throwing Naomi off. The blonde looks at the girl and sees that she looks thoroughly uncomfortable for some reason.

"Are you okay, Ems?"

Emily winces, and Naomi feels her stomach clench. "Fine, I'm fine" she says monotonously. Then her eyes flicker towards the exit and back again. "Listen Naomi, I have to go. Enjoy your night".

"But–"

It's too late though. Before Naomi can act through her drug-induced haze, Emily's petite form is out through the door like a shot. Leaves her to stand like a spare by herself at the door, her mind a muddle of confusion and unanswered questions. She begins to feel oddly empty, considering how...full...she felt beforehand. And the longer she stands there the lonelier she becomes. Eventually she feels a hand tug gently at her own.

"Hey, Blondie? Ya alrigh'?"

She glances around and sees Cook behind her, his normally lecherous and boisterous expression instead replaced by a look of curiosity and tenderness. The blonde bimbo is noticeably absent from his side. She snorts. "Where's your friend?" the blonde asks.

He shrugs. "Already done the dirty on her, 'aven't I? Shagged her in the bogs. Now, ya coming with the Cookie Monster or what?"

She giggles, despite Cook's vulgarity. Smiles softly. Immediately feels a little better, with her friend's familiar fingertips clutching at her own. Allows him to pull her to the dancefloor, where they immerse themselves in the music once more. It's hard to imagine that only a few hours ago they were entertaining this very crowd around them, yet that whole experience now feels very distant to Naomi. Can't understand why she suddenly feels like it doesn't matter.

The rest of the night passes by in a blur; Cook's clearly on something too, so the both of them literally end up dancing like nobody's watching. Effy eventually reappears at her side, and no questions are exchanged. They instead revert back to their normal ways, where it's all rapid fire but no warmth. There's more kissing involved though, along with some light groping. Promises of what's to come later.

But even when later does come, where she, Cook and Effy – Freddie presumably went off with that Hispanic girl – are squished into the back of a taxi, she still feels that hollow sensation in the pit of her stomach. Even as Effy's feathery fingertips trace circles along her clothed thigh, all she can think of is the contrasts of Emily. Where one moment she's gazing up at Naomi from the crowd, fire dancing in pools of brown, and the next she's fleeing as if her life depended on it.

The blonde tries to tell herself that she doesn't care. That Emily isn't her friend, it doesn't matter. So why does she _still_ care?

.


	5. Caffeine

_Come on now...you didn't think I was gonna give up the game THAT easily, did you? Please...I'm just getting started. _

_Hope you enjoy this update. Kind of a small one. It's my birthday this week so double yay :D_

.

* * *

.

Her fingers ineptly hover above the keys. They twitch every so often when a new thought or idea crosses her mind. They usually turn out to be false alarms however; she just continues to stare vacantly at the screen before her, the title menacingly glaring out at her and taunting her.

_Write an essay on Shakespeare's use of language and metaphors in his works._

Naomi grunts and curls her fingers into fists, finally conceding defeat. _Fuck this, _she thinks tiredly, raising a hand to her forehead and pinching the bridge of her nose. A pulse throbs along her brow, sending a piercing pain throughout her head.

Her tiredness and inability to function properly is the result of a persistent hangover – Cook recently found this new underground electro club in the city centre so he, Naomi and Effy all took the liberty of checking it out last night. Big mistake – two jaegerbombs, countless shots, an MDMA pill and a blurry trip home by taxi later and Naomi barely managed to make it to bed. It's a miracle she's even awake in the first place, let alone here in the library working. Well, _trying _to work. And failing.

She lets out a long sigh and flutters her eyelids closed. Lets her head fall forward a little, enjoying a brief moment of peace to herself. Is tempted to lie her head down on the desk in front of her, but decides against it. It would no doubt raise a few eyebrows, and she might not be able to wake herself up if she does. Instead she lets herself daydream. Lets her thoughts wander to the mess that was last night. She can remember blurry snippets; Cook constantly guffawing and chugging down drink after drink. Her downing every shot that's placed in front of her. Effy discreetly pulling out some pills and passing them each one. Cook bouncing around to the tunes and groping any female body that comes into contact with his practised fingers. Her meandering her way to the dancefloor and becoming entranced by the music pulsing around her. Effy's Goddess-like form being illuminated by the bounteous colours – pinks and purples and blues – as she joins Naomi, the energetic beats wrapping themselves around her slim body and causing her to flow and sway as a result.

A lazy grin works its way onto the blonde's face while she continues to remember. Effy proceeding to press herself to Naomi, her sweat from the heat of the club trickling down her skin and coming into contact with Naomi's own flesh. Naomi locking gazes with the enigmatic brunette, whose eyes are dilated to black, and slithering her hands along the girl's body. Effy rocking hips with her and pressing hot, smouldering kisses along her neck. Naomi groaning and throwing her head back, vaguely aware of Cook's booming voice somewhere in her periphery. Effy's slender fingers clawing into her back while the beat kicks up a few notches, which in turn causes Naomi to press an urgent hand to the brunette's torso and glide it upwards. The drugs and desire drive her on...the hand continues to work its way up. Slowly, deliciously...until it brushes across Emily's tit– _Wait what? _

She jerks wide awake in her seat and lets out a yelp of surprise. Then cringes. Looks around rapidly to see if anyone heard or noticed her. No, luckily – although she's then surprised to find that a coat of sweat has formed on her brow. She raises a twitching hand and wipes at her forehead, trying to steady her suddenly shallow breathing. _Emily? __What the fuck? _she thinks in bewilderment, trying to decipher if she'd just experienced a moment of insanity. Takes a few moments to calm down, and then tries to think rationally. No, she didn't imagine it – a familiar streak of red had indeed just crept into her vision. Conveniently enough, where Effy should've been. But...Emily wasn't even out last night, was she? No, definitely not. _Fucking hell._

The blonde shakes her head disbelievingly. Swiftly stretches out her arm and presses the lid of Freddie's laptop closed. He'd let her borrow it so she could do her essay, but now figures she definitely won't get anything done. Instead she gets to her feet and packs up her things, reasoning a snack might snap her out of her grogginess a bit. Then she walks out of the library, her satchel strung over her shoulder and her face notably expressionless.

Two weeks. That's how long it's been since 'Silverflux''s gig, and also – ironically enough – how long it's been since she's seen Emily Fitch. Naomi didn't think to dwell on the redhead's hasty departure that night, figuring she just genuinely needed to leave. So she proceeded to carry on as normal. She went to class. Did her assignments. Went to the library. Practiced with the band. She didn't spare a thought for the girl. And it was all okay, at least for the first few days. But then the blonde couldn't help but become inexplicably irritated by Emily's noticeable absence. She hadn't really seen her around college either, which was odd. Anytime she saw a flash of red though, her head would whirl around like a shot. Usually against her will. Except more often than not it would be some red-haired impostor. And Naomi couldn't help but mull over this; before, Emily seemed to be pretty much everywhere. And now she was, literally, nowhere.

Her bag starts to bang against her side so she strings it higher onto her shoulder. By now she's tried to forget about it. Emily is probably very busy, and unlike her is actually trying to make a decent attempt to do her work. Why does she care anyway? Like she's emphasized so many times before – _Emily's not my friend, _she thinks sternly, a frown marring her features as she joins the queue in the SU shop. She sighs and shuffles her feet.

It doesn't matter, really. She has Eff. Cook. Freddie. That's all she needs. She doesn't need some fresher tagging along, no matter how nice she is. No matter how pretty she is. Except she can't help but continue to be bothered by Emily cropping up in her head at the oddest of times. Especially since she's pretty sure groping, imaginary or not, is not exactly a 'friendly' way to carry on.

Fuck it. Must be the drugs from last night. Resolves to push the issue aside, for her own sake, whilst she buys a chocolate bar and leaves the shop. Makes a last ditch attempt to rid the red tinge from her vision.

_._

A few hours later and Naomi emerges from her last lecture of the day. Her expression is one of relief, yet it's also weary – the hangover still presses sharply against her skull. She's been craving her bed all day and soon plans to make that a reality. So it's with contentment that she makes her way quickly and purposefully towards the stairs. At the same time she mentally takes note of all she has to do and whether or not she's forgotten anything. Stops when she realizes she still has loads to do and has probably forgotten something.

Whatever. That could all be dealt with tomorrow. For now, as she descends the flight of stairs, all she wants to think about is the Chinese she'll be having later. The cozy, warm duvet she'll be snuggling into. The hours of blissful, dreamless sleep she'll have before another grueling day of college tomorrow–

"AH!"

Her imaginings are abruptly cut short however when she collides into a firm body, thus sending her tumbling to the ground. And to make matters worse, after a few seconds in this new horizontal position she realizes that there's something warm and wet rapidly soaking through her clothes. "Fuck's sake!" she exclaims heatedly as she rises into a sitting position. Then shakes her arms to rid herself of some of the coffee now splattered all over her. "Jesus, don't you watch where you're going?" she says, her voice still a yell. "Look what you've done you useless pr–"

Her words die in her throat when she finally glances up. Her sight is met with a curly-haired bloke standing frozen above her, his face ashen and his eyes bulging. His mouth is opening and closing continuously, like that of a fish's, and the now empty coffee cup is clutched tightly in his white fingers. He's clearly too shocked or embarrassed to do anything. But it's not this shell-shocked guy who's stopped Naomi dead in her tracks. No, because right next to him stands the instantly recognizable stature of Emily Fitch, whose appearance is mildly startled and – _what the? –_ affronted.

The three of them remain in this terse silence for a couple of seconds, for Naomi is momentarily too stunned to say anything else. Too stunned at the sense of déjà vu surrounding this picture, with Emily once more staring at her like she doesn't know her. Like they're both strangers. Except they're not strangers anymore. And the redhead's stare, this time around, makes her feel strangely hollow.

Eventually the flabbergasted bloke tries to get a word out at last. "I'm s-s-so sorry!" he stutters in a choked up voice. "I-I didn't mean to...I mean, I-I wasn't...oh fucktits! I'm such a useless sodding–"

"Enough, JJ" Emily commands quietly, and the calm authority in her tone is enough to cause a shudder to inexplicably rip up Naomi's spine. Then her gaze meets Naomi's dead-on, and the intensity of her stare somehow makes the blonde feel smaller than she already is – even though she's still splayed out on the ground like a tit. Her mouth grows even drier at the noticeable annoyance in those normally warm brown eyes. "Care to continue, Naomi?" she asks tightly, her rosy lips pursed. Several students walk by, their stares glancing over the scene before them. "'Cause I'm sure I'd just _love_ to hear you insult and demean my friend here on something that was a complete accident. Seriously, go on – make my day" she continues curtly. Naomi is struck for words. Struck for anything, really. She just continues to gawk at the redhead, whose expression is unwaveringly hard. Too hard. Almost forced.

Finally, the blonde lets out a long exhalation and looks back towards the boy. "I'm sorry" she says softly, and means it. Then glances away and proceeds to try and get to her feet. As she's rising up off her knees though, she feels a gentle hand grip under her arm. Looks up and sees the guy – JJ, was it? – trying to assist her. "Thank you" she murmurs in a hushed tone when she's fully upright, now feeling quite embarrassed. She tugs her bag strap back onto her shoulder just as JJ nods and steps back. The coffee cup is still gripped tightly in his hand, and Naomi can see his gaze flickering back and forth between her and the floor.

"It's really not that bad, the stain" he blurts out hoarsely. "I mean, a bit of detergent or something and it will come out. Well, that's what I assume anyway. I was never any good at washing my clothes, usually left that to my mum. But I'm sure your shirt will be fine, it's barely noticeable. Well, actually, it's quite noticeable but I'm sure nobody will say anything out of courtesy–"

"JJ" Emily warns again, and the boy falls silent at once. Naomi can't help but let an imperceptible smile tweak at her lips. Sympathizes with the poor guy, because it's already clear that he can't seem to help himself. But then she glimpses Emily's stance again and sobers up at once. "Listen, I'll catch up with you in a little while, okay? I'm just going to have a chat with Naomi" she says next, and Naomi blanches. Suddenly feels as if Emily is her parent and she's the naughty child, which is ridiculous because she's older than the freshman.

JJ gives a curt nod. "Yes, of course. Suppose I should go anyway. Naomi, was it? Yes, it was. Well, it was nice to meet you...um...bump into you, Naomi. Apologies again, about the shirt. Hopefully similar instances won't occur in future, because that would be most embarrassing. Well, uh, yes...buh bye". He shoots her an awkward smile and walks quickly away. The blonde watches his jerky gait until he rounds the next corner, but still doesn't look back when he's gone. She can still feel Emily's eyes boring through her.

She sighs harshly. "Look, Emily–"

"You can't be harsh with Jay, okay?" she interrupts sternly. Naomi reluctantly looks her in the eye. "He doesn't react well to...stuff...like that" she adds, her words careful. "He's different". Her eyes are wide and beseeching now, but they still hold a certain coldness. A coldness that Naomi can't place.

"I didn't mean to go off on him, alright?" the blonde murmurs earnestly. "It's been a bad day...I'm tired and hungover and–"

"Aw, poor you" Emily cuts in again, drawlingly. This time there's a certain playfulness to her tone. It tweaks at Naomi's heart a little. She chances a tentative smile and glances down at the girl's hands. Sees dashes of blue slicked along her fingers. "I wonder...if you'd been in such a bad mood the day_ I_ crashed into you, do you think we'd be speaking at all?" the redhead continues, and her husky voice is now falsely inquisitive. It causes the blonde to chuckle heartily. Makes her realize that she's glad to see Emily again, despite the circumstances with which it happened. She's glad to be around her.

Naomi suppresses this contentment after a moment. "Who knows? But then again–", she stretches out her shirt and gestures to the large, blotchy brown stain now spread across it, "–you never managed to do _this _to me" she replies lightheartedly. Emily smirks shrewdly, the hardness in her expression softening with each passing moment. She almost seems relieved, although the blonde can't fathom why.

"Well, you've been warned" Emily continues on casually. Then fixes Naomi with narrowed eyes. "Don't fuck with my mates".

The blonde chuckles again and holds up a submissive hand. "Duly noted" she concedes with a small smile. They both giggle their way into silence and then just stand there awkwardly. The tension has eased off considerably over the past minute or two, thankfully, and Naomi suddenly finds that she doesn't really want to leave – which is odd considering she _was _leaving just before this little mishap occured. Wonders if she _should _leave, just in case any other bad thing happens.

But then Emily seems to make the decision for the both of them; Naomi watches as, out of the blue, those brown eyes widen imperceptibly and flash with panic, before she ducks her face completely from the blonde's view. "So, I suppose I should head. Stuff to do, you know?" she says, but the huskiness in her tone sounds wrong now. Naomi's caught off-guard by the abruptness, so only nods stupidly and begins to stammer.

"Oh, yeah...um, me too" she mumbles inarticulately. Finds her gaze flashing ineptly back and forth between Emily's uncomfortable expression and her blue-stained hands. The redhead offers a curt nod along with an almost rueful smile.

"See you, Naomi" she murmurs quietly, before turning and striding quickly away. It's only while the blonde is watching her go, with her long and silky crimson hair flowing behind her, that she abruptly realizes something. The yellow, the blue, the books...

"Art".

Emily comes to a halt about eight feet away. Her head turns slowly – unsurely – back around and she eyeballs Naomi. Confusion is evident in her gaze. "I'm sorry?" she asks uncertainly.

A wry grin makes its way onto the blonde's face. "You do art" she repeats plainly. Triumphantly. Comprehension creeps across Emily's face at once; she turns around fully and gazes at Naomi for a long moment. Considers her. It makes the blonde feel strangely nervous all of sudden. Makes her feel as if the redhead is appraising her, evaluating her. But then, just before Naomi goes to say something else to defuse the renewed tension, Emily's face breaks out into a huge beam. It causes that familiar dull ache in Naomi's stomach to return.

She hears the girl scoff lightly. "Figured it out then?" she asks eventually, abandoning her attempt to flee and walking back towards Naomi. That old sparkle is back in her eyes now. Naomi's grin softens at the sight of it.

"Yeah" she answers softly. "I remembered those heavy books you carried around before. They were art ones, weren't they?" Emily is about to nod, but is cut short when Naomi gently – unthinkingly – reaches for her fingers. She swears she can feel a spark course up through her arm once her own fingers meet Emily's, but she quickly brushes it off. Glances back up and sees a sudden startled look on the redhead's face. "The paint, too. You paint". It's not a question. Her gaze lowers to the dashes of colour again, and then swiftly back up. She observes as Emily swallows a lump down her throat. Becomes fascinated by the way her neck moves.

"You're right" the girl says quietly after a few moments. Then bites her lip. "I'm doing Fine art and History of Art for my BA. But I paint in my spare time. It's...kind of like your music, I think. It's calming to me. Soothing". A pensive little smile tweaks at her lips when she looks down, and Naomi feels completely empathetic with her in that moment. Connected. Pushes it away before she has time to dwell over what it means.

"Well then, little Ms Artist" she chirrups next. Emily glances up once more at the change in Naomi's tone. Raises an eyebrow. The blonde's soft smile has pulled up into a teasing smirk. "Perhaps you can paint me a picture as to why you've been a no show lately, hmm? Cook and I did not appreciate you skipping off from our gig, you know" she says jokingly.

A flash of heat crosses those brown eyes for an instant. Then the redhead giggles lightly and shrugs. "Oh yeah. That" she says awkwardly. "Guess I wasn't feeling great" she finishes with a mumble. Her expression is oddly blank as she says it, and immediately Naomi knows she's not telling the whole truth. Yet she doesn't think to hold it against Emily, because she's more occupied with the fact that the redhead is here talking to her _now. _That's good enough for her.

So as they walk off out of the block together, chatting away amicably as if the blonde didn't even have coffee all down her front, Naomi senses that something has shifted between them. She senses that, in no uncertain terms, they're finally friends now – without either of them having to say it. And despite the blonde not really knowing what to make of that, she accepts it. I mean, what else had she been expecting?

.


	6. Changes

_I am sooo sorry for the severe lack of updates lately. B__etween birthday madness (thanks for the wishes by the way), trying not to slip on the ice and fall on my arse and becoming piled under with college work, the ideas for chapters were pretty slim. I hope this one makes up for it though. _

___A bit more Naomi/Effy interaction in this one (boo hiss, I know haha). Along with some...other character interaction. You'll see what I mean later. ____Oh yeah, and I should probably start putting in those disclaimer yokes shouldn't I? _

___I don't own skins, but I'd catch it if it slipped on ice._

___._

* * *

.

She slouches further back into the couch and lets out a content sigh. At the same time she lets her arms relax around the bulky instrument in her lap. Then allows her mind to drift while her fingers absentmindedly start plucking a few notes of their own. Her eyes flicker towards the only window in the room. A sharp beam of sunlight penetrates through the pale, bedraggled curtains covering the screen and casts its light around the quiet space. A soft smile tweaks at her lips. It's peaceful here.

But then Naomi's gaze inadvertently flickers to her left and she almost shrieks with fright to see that pale blue eyes are watching her. Effy, wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt and shorts, is standing underneath the doorway to Naomi's hall. Her brown hair is knotted and there's a wry smirk on her face. Her skin is wearily pale from sleep still, but it nevertheless manages to emit a faint glow. A familiar feeling of awe washes over the blonde while she holds her gaze – that piercing, soul-searching gaze – and she wonders, like so many times before, how she ever managed to find this otherworldly creature.

"Spying on me, were you?" she manages to croaks out, her tone playful.

Effy's smirk widens. "More like studying" she replies simply. Unashamedly. Naomi can't help but be unsurprised. It's natural for Effy to read people. Naomi often thinks that the brunette has a heightened sense of perception; like she thinks differently from everyone else. It adds to her allure, if it were possible. But it can also detract from it too – the blonde finds that she doesn't like to feel scrutinized all the time.

Her thoughts are cut short however when Effy steps out of the doorway. She steps lithely towards Naomi and slinks her way onto the couch, curling her legs in under herself and leaving a space between them. They stay silent for a few minutes, the only noise around being the faint sounds of traffic from the street below. "It's peaceful" Effy murmurs eventually, much to the blonde's amusement. An echo to her previous thoughts. She represses the urge to scoff – _Oracle Effy strikes again – _and instead observes as those blue eyes flash to the guitar in her lap. Effy extends one long, slender finger to stroke across it. "Anything?" she asks obscurely in a hoarse voice, her gaze trailing after her finger.

Naomi shakes her head solemnly. "Nah" she mumbles. Then bites her lip. "It feels like my head is kind of...stuck, you know?" she explains. "It's like I know what words I want to say...but they just won't come out or something". Her brow furrows once she says it and then she lets out a low chuckle. "Suppose that's nothing new though". She strums a chord, deflecting away from the following silence, and looks back at Effy. Is surprised to see that her expression is slightly hardened. "What?" the blonde asks tentatively.

Effy's eyes narrow imperceptibly. "I've seen it" she whispers. Naomi raises a questioning eyebrow. The brunette tilts her head. "You've been distracted lately. Your mind...it's off somewhere else". Naomi chews on this for a moment, before coming to the conclusion that Effy is indeed right. As per usual. Her mind _has _been off somewhere lately. Off in a world tinted in red. But that doesn't make things seem any clearer, so before she can stop herself she asks:

"Why?"

They stare at eachother for a long moment, searching one another. But then Effy just shrugs. "I'm not sure" she admits, and her stance has changed from detached to wary. Naomi decides not to question her on it. Instead places her guitar down beside the couch and shifts a bit closer.

"Doesn't matter, I guess" she concedes, although the question still nags at her. Effy meets her eye and they both smile softly, the mood altering from tense to calm again. The brunette reaches out a hesitant hand and twirls her fingers through Naomi's blonde locks. Naomi scoots even closer so that their sides are pressed together, before moving her hand to stroke tenderly up and down the bare skin of Effy's thigh. The brunette releases a content sigh, which surprises her a little. Encouraged, she leans in and places a gentle, chaste kiss to Effy's dry lips before pulling back slightly. Then they both lean forwards until their foreheads are touching. Effy's fingers continue to run through Naomi's hair. They remain still.

The atmosphere has shifted to intimate all of a sudden. Naomi lets the feeling wash over her. It's nice. This is nice. She can't remember if times were ever like this between them – calm, close. Peaceful. This half-embrace makes a welcome change from their usual frantic heat. And although she usually wasn't one for this kind of connection – being openly close to another person – she finds this time it's welcome for once. Doesn't know why she's felt so lonely lately.

"Whoa, sorry".

Their bubble is burst in the blink of an eye at the sound of a contrite voice. Naomi pulls her head away and sees Freddie standing cautiously in the entryway that Effy had previously been occupying. A petite fair-haired girl hovers behind him. "Mind if we come in?" he asks hesitantly, his expression awkward yet slightly sceptical. It's then that Naomi catches herself and moves her hand off Effy's thigh. Effy likewise extracts her hand from Naomi's hair and the blonde fails to catch her expression as it reshapes to stoic again. Hot to cold. They were both masters of it.

"Yeah, 'course" she says stiffly, shuffling in her seat ineptly. Freddie smiles at them both and strides in, the girl following close behind. They walk through the archway into the tiny kitchen space. It's only when they're out of earshot though that Naomi dares to speak. "Wonder how long Freddie's latest conquest will last?" she jokes in a whisper. She can't help but recall the Hispanic girl from the gig a couple of weeks ago – Naomi did see her the morning after, but that was also the _only _time she would ever see her. She glances towards Effy for a reply and is met with the sight of the girl staring off into space. "Eff?" she tries again.

Effy looks back at her and smiles tightly. "Don't know" she replies plainly, shrugging. Before Naomi can say anything else however, the fair-haired girl comes back in. The first thing Naomi notices is that she's, well...very attractive. Long, wavy golden hair. Bright brown oval eyes. Pouted lips. Her small and curvy frame is currently dressed in one of Freddie's old shirts – Naomi knows this not only because it's clearly too big on her, but because she also remembers seeing it on her friend. Yeah, she's cute alright. Nothing extraordinary though.

"Hi there" she says awkwardly, shuffling beneath the arch. "Freddie said I could sit in here while he makes breakfast. Is that...okay?" she asks. Naomi suppresses a snort. Honestly, you think the girl was asking to borrow a million quid off her if her panicked expression was anything to go by. Still, the blonde makes a conscious effort not to roll her eyes or make some sort of sarcastic quip. For Freddie's sake at least.

"Sure, come in" she says, gesturing the poor girl in. The girl smiles briefly before crossing the room. She takes seat in an armchair placed opposite the couch her and Effy are sitting on. Naomi glances sideways at Effy and sees that her stance is aloof. The blonde sighs. Looks like it's up to her to make niceties. _Fuck's sake, why do_ I _have to be entertaining Freddie's flussies? _she thinks sardonically. "So, um...what's your name?" she asks.

The girl wriggles in her seat. "Rose. And you?" she mumbles.

"I'm Naomi, Freddie's roommate. And this is..." She looks back at Effy, wondering whether or not she'll have to make introductions for her too. Luckily the brunette finds her voice.

"Effy" she says firmly. Naomi glimpses Rose start out of the corner of her eye. She can't blame her. Effy is quite startling when you first meet her.

"Right" answers Rose.

An awkward silence falls over the room. Naomi concedes and breaks it after a minute or two. "So where'd you and Freddie meet?" she asks indifferently.

The girl smiles sheepishly. "Some club in town. Wasn't a great place really, but it was nice meeting Freddie". She hesitates then, clearly not wanting to disclose too much. Her cheeks are tinged pink by this stage. She takes a pointed look around instead.

"This is a really nice place you have here, uh, Naomi" she murmurs. "Do you go to Goldsmiths too? Freddie said he was going there, and that his place was quite closeby. Must be handy being so near the college". Naomi chews on her lip. She was already getting bored. Brilliant.

"Yeah, I'm in my second year of English. It's good. What about you? What are you studying?"

Rose wriggles even more in her seat, her stance now beyond uncomfortable. "Oh um...well, I..." she mumbles before trailing off.

Naomi sees Effy abruptly sit up straight next to her. Glimpses a sudden – and familiar – knowing smirk on her face. "You're not_ in_ college yet, are you?" she says astutely. Cutting to the chase.

The girl's blush intensifies to a deep red. "Um...no, not yet" she admits bashfully, sighing. "But I will be next year!" she implores. "I'm probably going to apply to Goldsmiths too so..."

_Oh this is too brilliant, _Naomi thinks menacingly. _This is a new one Freds. Underage. Nice. _She shares an amused glance with Effy before looking back at Rose. Now that Naomi comes to think of it – as she stares curiously at the girl now fidgeting endlessly in the chair across from her – Rose _does_ look a little...young. It was something the blonde couldn't quite place when she first walked in. She wonders whether Freddie knows that his little fling is also a little sixth-form student.

"You're not going to tell him, are you?" Rose asks in a squeaky voice, answering Naomi's silent question. Her brown eyes are now wide and fearful.

Naomi's about to answer, but it's Effy who does instead. "It's not a big deal" she says calmly. "Maybe you should just tell him and get it over with. Guys like younger girls, so I'm sure he won't mind. Plus, you're very attractive". Her honesty is enough to cause Naomi to stare at the brunette with raised eyebrows. Effy merely shrugs unapologetically.

"Please don't tell him" the girl beseeches, despite Effy's words of comfort. "I'm sure you're right but...I like Freddie, and I don't want him to cast me aside just 'cause I'm still in school. Please?"

The blonde opens her mouth to speak, but as if right on cue Freddie then stomps in with two plates in his hands. "Sorry babe, we don't have much food around here. Naomi was supposed to go shopping". He stares at her in mock annoyance and Naomi sticks her tongue out at him. "Hope you like beans on toast". He walks over to her chair and hands her a plate. Then ungracefully sits himself on an arm of the chair. He looks down and smiles warmly at her, but she practically grimaces in reply. "Something wrong Rosie?" he asks considerately. "Don't like beans on toast?"

Rose's gaze flashes from the plate, to Naomi and then back to Freddie. "No I do...I just..."

Freddie catches on immediately. He throws an accusing glare towards Naomi and Effy. "What did you two do? You better not have been messing with her" he says sternly.

Again Effy replies. "We weren't" she says truthfully. Coolly. Much less defensively than how Naomi would have said it.

Freddie's not convinced. He looks down at Rose once more and puts a hand on her shoulder. "Babe, it's okay. What did they do?"

Rose's eyes meet Naomi's and she catches her silent plea again; _Please don't tell him. _Even her stance has changed. She's now positioned herself in a pleading sort of way, with her body facing toward them and her shoulders limp and defeated. In most circumstances, Naomi probably would tell Freddie the truth. Who was this girl to her anyway? Rose? She was nothing. In fact, the blonde finds this whole situation slightly hilarious. It would be quite entertaining to see Freddie's reaction. And as Effy said, it was no big deal. Maybe he wouldn't mind at all.

Why should _she _be keeping the flame of this foolish girl's dreams alive? It wasn't _her _problem, _her _issue to be dealing with.

Before Naomi can cut in and blurt out the truth however, she finds her throat constricted. Her eyes are still locked with Rose's, and it's caused something to start stirring deep within her. And it's then that she realizes that those bright brown eyes seem familiar. She recognizes those same wide, inquisitive eyes from somewhere else. And it melts her.

"Nothing" she murmurs quickly. "We were just joking around". Her voice is breezy and Rose's eyes flash with open shock. Naomi narrows her blue ones. "Eh Rose?" she adds. The girl flinches, catching her drift.

"Oh, yeah...we were just chatting" she says quietly, playing along.

Freddie scoffs in frustration. "Whatever" he says, still not entirely convinced.

Naomi, satisfied, gets to her feet. "Okay then. I've got a lecture at eleven. I'm gonna get dressed". Not looking at Effy, she nods at the two of them and walks stiffly out. Suddenly wishes to be as far away from Rose as possible. Those eyes...she doesn't know why they caught her off-guard so much. She shakes off the sensation however once she walks into her room and starts rummaging for some clothes. It's a few minutes later, just as she's putting on her make-up, when she hears a voice speak.

"You didn't tell him".

She puts down her mascara brush and looks up. Sees Effy leaning against the far wall. Studying her again.

Naomi shrugs indifferently. "You sound surprised" she counters. She resumes putting on her mascara. Sees Effy's figure appear in the reflection of her mirror a moment later.

"I thought you would" she says unabashedly. Again Naomi shrugs.

"Maybe you thought wrong". She sets down her brush and applies a coat of lipgloss before surveying her result in the mirror. Perfect. Then she gets up and is met by Effy standing solidly behind her. Those pale blue eyes are narrowed again, and it's almost as if they're trying to see something inside her. "What?" Naomi asks, this time irritably.

Effy pauses and, unexpectedly, reaches out to stroke Naomi's face. The blonde is taken aback by the gesture, and finds her walls flickering again. "You're changing" the brunette says in a soft voice. Again Naomi's about to ask her earlier question – _Why? –_ but Effy predicts it. "I'm not sure" she whispers. Naomi can't tell whether it's a lie or not; her expression is impassive. Then Effy turns and walks back out of the room, and Naomi's left to wonder what it is exactly that Effy sees. What is it about herself that's changing?

.

It's just as she's walking out of one of her classes that she sees her. She's standing alone, facing the noticeboard. Hip cocked to one side. Dressed thickly in warm clothes. Naomi probably wouldn't have recognized her initially, considering she has a furry trapper hat pulled down over her head. It's the hair, though – her blue eyes distinguish those familiar strands of crimson red hair as they splay down the back of her jacket.

"Emily!" she calls out eagerly, a smile involuntarily and instantaneously working its way across her features.

The redhead spins around and spots Naomi, a matching smile magically appearing on her face as well. The blonde walks quickly up to her, stopping short just in front of her. Contemplates giving her a hug, but decides against it. She doesn't hug. "Hey Naomi" greets Emily. "Finished class?"

"Hey. Yeah, finished literature there. Except I've got two more lectures later". Her gaze redirects to the board beside them. "What are you looking at?"

Emily looks back around and extends her hand. Points to a poster in the middle of the board. "A couple of my mates have organized an event on Halloween. It's in some club near the city". The blonde follows Emily's finger and eyes the large black poster she's pointing at. After a quick glance over it, Naomi grimaces.

"Themed?" she says hesitantly.

Emily rolls her eyes. "Duh Naomi. It _is _Halloween, remember?" she says playfully. Then her brown eyes narrow and she smirks. "Why? Were you gonna go?" she asks perceptively. Naomi flinches in surprise. _Was _she going to go? She never liked themed nights. Thought they were too tacky a lot of the time. Still, something about the challenge in Emily's expression makes her want to prove the redhead wrong.

"Maybe" she says unhelpfully. Looks down and pretends to fiddle with her fingernails. "If you get me on the guestlist. Free in" she teases.

She looks up with a grin when she hears Emily laugh her husky laugh. Ignores how her heart skips to the rhythmic sound of it. "I guess I could try" she cedes. "Cool, so...you're going then?"

Naomi pretends to mull over it. Fixes Emily with a raised eyebrow. "Sure. Why not" she eventually agrees. Watches as quiet delight spreads over Emily's face. She likes it. Likes to see that she made Emily happy. Wishes she could make her look like that all the time.

After that exchange they merely chat on as normal, before eventually moving to leave the block. It's when they make it out the front door however that Naomi stops dead. She sees Emily frown at her out of the corner of her eye. "Naomi? What's wr_–_"

"Eff?" the blonde blurts out.

Yes, it's Effy alright; the enigmatic figure of the brunette is leaning on her heels against a wall just outside the entrance, one arm crossed across her abdomen and the other with a cigarette attached to the end. She's staring right at Naomi and Emily. Her gaze doesn't waver as she goes to take a drag.

"Naomi" she says simply. Exhales. "Who's this?"

The blonde looks around and sees Emily gawking at the brunette as well. Is puzzled to see that her stance has turned hard. Not unlike when she crashed into JJ. She finds her voice once she glances back towards Effy. "Emily. This is Emily". Effy stubs out her cigarette on the wall behind her. Then rocks forward on her heels and walks toward them, her gait oddly determined.

"Effy Stonem. Pleased to meet you" she purrs. She extends a hand for Emily to shake. It takes her friend a moment or two to accept it, and even Naomi can't blame her for hesitating. Something about Effy's expression is a bit off. Forced.

"So Eff, um...what's up?" the blonde asks uncertainly.

Effy's blue eyes flash to Naomi's face. An imperceptible smirk tweaks at her lips. "Is it wrong of me to want to wait for you?" she asks innocently. "You're finished your lecture, yeah?"

Naomi hesitates. Is brought up short by Effy's unexpected response and finds herself trying to stutter out a reply. "Yeah, I guess but..."

She glances ineptly towards Emily, who seems to have gone mum. The girl is fiddling with flaps of her hat and her gaze is currently fixated on her shuffling boots. If Naomi weren't so confused, she probably would have found the sight adorable.

"Cool. Wanna get some lunch?" Effy swiftly asks next. Again the blonde is stuck for words. She's torn between wanting to hang out with Emily and wanting to please Effy. Emily seems to be winning out though _– _she hasn't seen the brunette since leaving this morning, and this encounter right now is putting her off. Still, before she has the chance to answer Emily makes the decision for her.

"It's fine, Naomi" she says in a bright voice. It doesn't sound right coming from her mouth. "Go spend time with your girlfriend, it's okay".

Naomi blanches. If she thought it was hard to say something before, she definitely can't even make an attempt to do so now – her throat feels as if it's closed in on itself. Effy notably doesn't make a move to correct her either. _What the...I mean, how did...The fuck? _her brain screams haphazardly. She stares blankly at Emily, her eyes wide and her skin pale. But Emily merely shrugs and smiles weakly. It doesn't reach her eyes. "See you later, yeah?" she says, and her expression becomes unreadable. Then she turns around and walks away without a look back. The blonde simply stares after her until she feels a cool hand slip into her own.

"C'mon babe, let's go" Effy's soft voice murmurs. The hand gently tugs at her own and she snaps back into the real world. She feels numb all of the sudden. So much so that she forgets to berate Effy over her tactlessness. Finds herself allowing the brunette to pull her in the opposite direction to where Emily went.

Her mind is abruptly so all over the place that she can't focus on anything other than putting one foot in front of the other. And if Effy notices, she doesn't say anything; they continue to walk in a terse silence on some random route, presumably to get lunch. But all Naomi cares about is how she managed to make Emily look both so happy and so disappointed in such a short amount of time. The sensation pulls at her chest, and she doesn't know why.

How did Emily know? Well Effy wasn't really her girlfriend so to speak, but still...she'd never mentioned them to Emily, had she? Except...then she vaguely remembers their gig _– _barely, considering the drugs she took that night _–_ and that same falsely detached expression on the redhead's face. Suddenly understands. Emily must have seen her with Effy on the dancefloor. Doing more than 'friendly' things. Yet that still didn't explain the change in Emily's demeanour. Or why thinking about Emily being possibly hurt was pulling Naomi in two different ways.

"Naomi, we're here" Effy says eventually in a gentle tone. Naomi starts and looks up. Sees they've arrived at their favourite cafe, which is located just off campus. It's a quaint, well-known little place that's quite popular amongst students. Relatively cheap too. But Naomi and Effy liked it more for the atmosphere. There was always something comforting about it. Calming. And she realizes that she needs this right now.

She looks back at Effy. Those empyreal blue eyes are probing again, and Naomi offers her a small smile. Decides to push Emily out of her mind once more, because she finds that not thinking about the redhead, more often than not, makes things slightly clearer. It's what she does best anyway. She pushes people away. Things are easier that way.

.

* * *

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_I know...Naomes is a bit dense, isn't she? And what are Effy's motives exactly? Why was she...well...such a bitch? Hmm...well I just hope you're still enjoying this and not hating it or its obscurity. Things will hopefully become clearer over time, I just have to get there first._

_What did you think? Review?_


	7. A Place to Be

.

"Hey, wait up you two! You're going too fast".

"Freds, it's not our fault you decided to dress up as a giant cardboard box. You'll just have to deal with trailing behind us for the rest of the night".

Naomi casts an impatient glance over her shoulder while she says it and has to stifle a snort when she sees Freddie literally hobbling after them. Looks back at Cook, whose bow is bobbing up and down over his chest, and shares an amused look with him. He's wearing a toothy grin.

A groan from Freddie. "It's not _just _a cardboard box, alright?" Pant. "It's a rubix cube!" Splutter. "Jesus Naomi, you'd be pretty hard pressed to find someone who hasn't seen a rubix cube bef– AGH!" Crash.

Her and Cook whirl around at the sound of a shriek and are met with the site of a huge, colourful rectangle kicking and floundering about on the ground. This time she can't hold it in – the night air becomes pierced with hers and Cook's guffawing.

"Yeah yeah, hilarious" comes Freddie's muffled voice from facedown on the ground. "Mind helping me up, guys?" They contain themselves long enough to walk over to where he's lying and grab an arm each. After two awkward and failed attempts, they hoist Freddie to his feet. "Ugh" he groans when he looks down. "It's dented!"

"Maybe you should take it off mate" suggests Cook, still biting back his laughter. "You'll probably have to sooner or later. Bound to get pretty hot in there". Freddie merely sniffs with disdain and begins to waddle ahead of them.

"C'mon. We're gonna be late to Eff's" he calls over his – pointy – shoulder at them. Again Naomi and Cook exchange an amused look, with her own eyebrows raised halfway up her forehead.

Cook's cheeky grin widens even more, if it were possible. He raises the half-full bottle he's carrying in his hand and jiggles it about animatedly. "Ya heard the man" he plainly says, before striding after Freddie. Naomi watches them both disbelievingly for a moment, shakes her head, then reluctantly follows in their wake.

A few minutes later and they're walking – with Freddie squeezing – through their destined corridor in Halls. They stop in front of Effy's door and Cook raises a fist and knocks loudly. Naomi, now slightly self-conscious, unthinkingly begins to tug at the strap of one of her braces as a distraction. Cook looks around just in time to glimpse the uneasy expression on her face. "Don' worry Naomikins, ya look stellar" he says kindly yet still rather lecherously. "Effs won't be able to keep her hands off ya" he adds with a wink, before looking back around at the sound of the door clicking. Naomi doesn't have time to ponder over as to why it's not really Effy that's got her worried this evening – although God knows what has instead – when the door flies open. All thoughts halt in her brain for a moment – or ten – as she takes in the figure that has appeared in the doorway.

Effy's normally gothic and dark yet utterly Goddess-like form is now completely transformed. And with it, all Naomi can see is red. Hot. Scorching. Burning. Blazing. Literally. She _is_ red – all decked out in a devil costume, complete with skintight dress and horns. But Naomi's been imagining red too much lately to immediately know that it's the wrong red. It's not the red she's grown to know as of late. Grown to like. The red that bamboozles her mind. And although Effy is, obviously, stunning in it, the red turns her into something that Naomi can't appreciate in all its glory. Yet as Effy's penetrating eyes flicker over them all, she manages to mask her sudden surge of discomfort to the best of her abilities. Years of pulling poker-faces pay off right now. _But hey...at least she looks fucking gorgeous, _a tiny voice in the back of her head reasons. She mentally agrees.

After an initial once-over of them all, those piercing blue eyes come to rest on Naomi. They linger for a long moment while Effy presumably takes in the blonde's costume – a thrown together ensemble that's supposed to show her as a policewoman. It's comprised of one of Freddie's old and shrunken blue shirts; her own black shorts, tights and black heels; a pair of braces from Cook and a new plastic police hat and badge that she got from one of those pound shops. To her satisfaction, she glimpses a tiny smile pluck at the corner of Effy's lips. But then her gaze moves to Cook and it turns into a scowl. "What the fuck are you supposed to be?" the brunette says frankly, without any hint of chagrin in her tone. Cook laps up her contempt with a smirk; he chuckles and spins around on the spot with his arms stretched wide. Then tugs at his bow, as well as the tag attached to it.

"Read 'em and weep Effy – ya can thank me later" he says arrogantly.

She leans forward and squints to read the hastily scrawled card. Naomi, whose face is stretched into an wide smirk, can predict what the girl's going to say before it even leaves her mouth.

"More like God's _mistake_ to women" Effy says drawlingly, rolling her eyes. Then turns around and walks into her flat without a second glance back. Cook looks back at the blonde and Freddie, a mischievous glint shining in his beady eyes.

"I tell ya, the birds–", He backs into the apartment, but not before grabbing and pulling at his crotch, "–_loves _them a bit of the Cookie Monster" he exclaims before disappearing out of view into the room. Freddie and Naomi share an exasperated grimace before following the two of them in.

.

Tensions settle down considerably within the next hour or so – with the tunes blaring from Effy's slightly old and beaten-up stereo, pre-drinks are well and truly underway. Cook's already gotten through most of the bottle of vodka he brought and is now onto one of the several spare beers Effy had in her fridge. Freddie – who's abandoned his box for the time being – is on his fourth and is pleasantly tipsy by this stage. Naomi, who had two cans of cider before leaving, isn't really feeling anything at all; she's currently stood in Effy's room, after having taken a detour on her way back from the bathroom. Her blue eyes are currently trailing along the overflowing corkboard Effy keeps above her dingy little single bed. The blonde has studied it many times before, but every time she's here there's been something new added. Newspaper articles, magazine cutouts, photographs, drawings, little pieces of shred-paper scrawled with lyrics. She's reacquainting herself with one particular photo – one of them both, carefree and happy, when a group of them all went to Glastonbury during the summer – when a familiar voice reaches her ears.

"No drinks for the copper?"

She doesn't even look around. Scoffs instead and fiddles with her brace strap. "No drinking on the job. I should be setting a good example". She glances around and sees that one of Effy's eyebrows has risen. She grins. "Okay, okay...honestly, I don't really feel like it. Not yet anyway". She returns her gaze back to the board and resumes her examination of it, her eyes this time falling upon another photograph. She bites her lip. They've never even met, yet she still feels as if she knows the boy in the picture. Tall, lean, handsome. Scruffy hair. Pale, almost ghostly skin. Empyreal, soul-searching blue eyes. She lets out a long breath. "Do you ever hear from him?" she asks the room at large. Feels Effy's presence at her shoulder a moment later.

"Yes. Except whenever we talk, it's brief. There's not much left to say anymore". She leaves it at that. Naomi expects as such.

"And your mum? Dad?"

A pause. "They try to talk to me. I just don't want to listen". Naomi nods to herself. Knows this is about as much as she'll get out of Effy. The brunette is notoriously closed-off when it comes to her family. Her past life. It's why she lives alone, here in the college – she finally has a life to herself, where whatever troubles she shared with her family are no longer a threat to her. But then the blonde catches sight of the several pieces of scrap-paper tacked alongside Tony's photograph; each are dotted with various words and snippets of lyrics from their band's songs. Each speak of love. Life. Loss. Kin.

Naomi can't help but ask. "Do you miss them?"

She feels Effy's gaze fall upon her. Meets that gaze with an impassive expression. One to match the look on the brunette's face right now. "Sometimes" Effy murmurs, eyes hard. Then hesitates. "When I'm lonely". Another pause. "At least I have a place to be now, though" she mumbles cryptically, and her stare abruptly becomes glazed over. Naomi remains silent. Hears Cook's voice boom from the other room, but still keeps quiet. Doesn't know how to answer, because she feels as if those words contain more depth than Effy's letting on. Can't shake the feeling that they somehow relate to her. Before she can offer any words of wisdom or comfort however, Effy turns the tables. Like she always does whenever the spotlight's been on her too long. "How's Gina?" she asks with a wry smile.

Naomi chuckles and rolls her eyes. Lets out a sigh and bites her lip again. "The same. She's still my kooky and quirky mother". She catches Effy's eye. "I think she's started letting those freeloaders stay in my room. She's started to sound guilty whenever I talk to her on the phone. Especially when I mention something about my room". She scoffs lightly. "The cow" she adds jokingly. Effy cracks a smile, but then turns her head to look at the board again. Her expression glazes over once more.

"Still. Must be nice having someone who cares" she murmurs matter-of-factly. Nonchalantly. Naomi feels a tight sensation in her chest once the words leave her lips. Guilt. She feels guilty. Doesn't know why. Doesn't know why she feels like she let Effy down in some way. But she remains quiet again. Doesn't know how to share herself right now, because she normally locks it all up. Except she doesn't get the chance, whether she wanted it or not – she hears footsteps behind her and glances around to see Freddie in the doorway, box now back on.

"We should probably get going ladies. The club's opening soon and Cook's probably going to end up puking here if we stick around much longer" he says lightly, rolling his eyes. Little does he know that he's just become Naomi's glorious saviour; like a lifeline, she latches onto his words and lets an awkward smile stretch across her face.

"Okay" she says feebly. He smiles briefly and shuffles back through the door. Naomi's gaze reluctantly flickers to Effy. "Shall we?" she asks, gesturing to the door. Effy, enigmatic aura now back in place, nods curtly. They walk slowly towards the door.

"You should definitely have a drink later. Your mind is screaming" the hushed voice utters in a mystic way just behind her. The blonde pulls a grimace that Effy can't see. Of course. Of course Effy knows everything, knows that her mind has gone into overdrive. No poker-face can hide that.

They step back into the brunette's living room, and Naomi offers a meek, "Yeah" in response. And in some weird attempt at consolation, she does the only thing she can think of in that moment. Her hand swings back and gently grabs one of Effy's. She squeezes it hard. A moment later and Effy squeezes back.

And so they're okay. For now.

.

Cook's hand slams a shot glass down in front of her. She eyes it questioningly for a moment before shooting him a sceptical look. "What is it?" she asks hesitantly. Watches as the barman hands Cook his own shot and two lemons, which clues Naomi in immediately. She's about to protest, but Cook's hearty voice cuts across her.

"You are _way _too sober Blondie. Now, drink your tequila like a good little girl and let's go fuckin' mental!" he roars, his voice noticeably thick from all the alcohol he's consumed already. He clumsily grabs his glass and waits for Naomi to do the same. Then they clink glasses and Naomi knocks back her shot. The liquid burns and stings her throat as it rolls its way down to her stomach. As she pulls the glass away from her lips, she screws up her face in disgust. Tequila and her were never really good friends – they've shared one too many a blackout together. This in mind, she blindly reaches for her slice of lemon and pushes it to her lips, sucking hard.

"Fuck" she growls harshly once she's composed herself, although she can still taste the bitterness of the liquid inside her mouth. Her gaze flashes back to Cook, who's now wearing a shit-eating grin and bobbing his head to the song playing overhead.

"C'mon Naomi, let's dance!" he shouts. He plucks at his bow absentmindedly and hastily yanks Naomi by the arm towards the dancefloor. She follows ineffectually, simultaneously taking note of the many colourful and somewhat ludicrous costumes people are wearing whilst they pass. Vampires. Witches. Werewolves. One bloke is dressed as a gigantic pumpkin. Then the less traditional. Several girls are done up as Lady Gaga. One guy has come as an Einstein lookalike. Another fella has ingeniously made an enormous cardboard cutout of his facebook profile page – he's even using his own face, which is poking out of a makeshift hole, instead of his profile picture. She's about to compliment the guy on it when Cook gives her one final yank; her friend starts leaping around manically and chortling, even before she's realized they've reached the middle of the dancefloor.

"Jesus Cook, take it easy!" she yells over the noise, although it's said lightheartedly; the alcohol has started to kick in.

Cook doesn't pay her any attention – a new song comes on, clearly one he likes, and he cheers with delight. His dancing and bouncing increases tenfold. Naomi tries not to laugh at the scathing looks people are throwing him as he crashes into them in his enthusiasm. "Liven up there Naomikins! You're off-duty, remember?" he says with a wink, reaching out a hand to press her hat down over her eyes. She shoos him away and fixes it, a large grin pulling at her lips. Then, deciding to give in, she grabs Cook's hand and begins to swing around with him. The sudden rush of tipsiness drives her on.

She has no idea where Freddie and Effy have fucked off to and frankly she doesn't care. Presumes Freddie has gone off and found another girl to flirt with and Effy is playing up to her mysterious, enigmatic reputation somewhere. She doesn't mean to be blunt, but her friend is right. She's been way too sober. Too sober for her all too sobering thoughts. She can't help it – her little 'moment' with Effy earlier had freaked her out a little. Left her wanting to put some space between them for the time being, which is exactly what she's doing now. Using the excuse she always uses with Effy, and hopes the brunette is choosing to do the same.

The two of them don't _need _one another. They just are.

Just then Cook twirls her, and she giggles happily. She enjoys this. Dancing. Laughing. Having fun. Not worrying about Effy or the red or that worry that's been nagging at her all day. Yes, everything's just easy right now, dancing to the music with Cook. Everything's just–

"Emilio!" Cook suddenly bellows, his eyes lighting up just as he peers over her shoulder. Naomi feels her body seize at once. Recognizes the pet name, and who it's connected to. So it's with great effort – partly helped along by the tequila – that the blonde makes herself turn around on the spot. Feels her breath catch in her throat as soon as her eyes hit their target.

There stands the familiar stature of Emily Fitch, with JJ standing timidly and directly behind her. Emily Fitch, whose hair constitutes the red that Naomi knows. Except this time it's pit against white; the girl is gloriously dressed from head to toe in white, complete with huge stilettos, wings and a golden halo hovering above her head. And not to sound frank, but the blonde immediately notes that Emily makes for one sexy angel. Not that she cares.

"Hi Naomi" the redhead says in that familiar husky voice, a genuine smile accompanying her words. A smile that looks nothing like the smile Naomi had witnessed the last time she saw her. Before she can respond though – which is proving difficult, because her mouth refuses to cooperate – Emily's sparkling brown eyes redirect to look past her shoulder. "Hey Cook! Nice bow" she says cheerfully. Cook roughly pushes past Naomi and makes a beeline for the poor redhead. Within seconds she's been scooped up into his suffocating grip. Naomi shares an awkward smile with JJ, who's now standing like a spare to the side.

"Cor, where ya been Emily? Cookie missed seeing your pretty lil' face around" her friend says affectionately, although his eyes are noticeably glazed-over from his inebriation. Then he swipes at her chin in a fond way, and Emily's smile widens. The sight rubs Naomi the wrong way for some reason, and she's filled with an unfamiliar emotion. An emotion that makes her feel a sudden anger towards Cook. But before she can become overcome by this new feeling, JJ addresses her.

"Hullo, Naomi. Your, um...I quite like your costume" he stutters, his eyes flickering every which way.

"Oh, thanks" she replies ineffectually, before casting her eyes over his form. Sees he's wearing a fancy business suit and that his hair has been slicked back, leaving it unnaturally stiff. She meets his eyes again and can't help it when her face contorts with confusion. "Uh, so...who are you supposed to be?" she says bluntly, although somewhat apologetically.

He clears his throat and smiles briefly. "John Forbes Nash Jr. A famous American mathematician, who has proved a great contribution to the world of mathematics. Although this doesn't seem to be a very good costume since no one seems to know who I am. Earlier a woman asked me if I was on my way home from work".

Naomi lets out a chuckle and smiles. "Well, you look very smart" she offers, feeling a sudden rush of affection for the poor bloke. Just like when she last saw him.

JJ blushes at her compliment. "Yes, well...he might not be very recognizable but I thought it was a good costume choice for me. Nash is a known paranoid schizophrenic, which just goes to show that just because you aren't normal doesn't mean that you can't be successful..."

He trails off on the last part and his eyes widen, as if he's said too much. Naomi isn't panicked by his his words, to be honest – _none_ of her friends are what you would call 'normal'. Sure, just look at Effy. She's like something from another planet altogether. But before she gets the chance to alleviate the situation, Emily suddenly reappears. She swiftly laces her hand with JJ's and gives it a tight squeeze, smiling softly at him. She'd clearly heard what he'd said. Her consideration turns out to be helpful, though – he smiles back after a moment, and then Emily lets go of his hand and turns her attention back to Naomi.

"So, you guys been here long?" she asks, her voice now slightly assertive whilst JJ looks a bit more withdrawn beside her.

It's Cook that answers; his appearance has become noticeably haughtier since Emily arrived. "Not too long, babe. You're just in time to see the Cookie Monster whip out his killer moves". He makes an exaggerated movement to the music still playing and both her and Emily laugh. Even JJ cracks a smile.

"Yeah, those moves could kill alright" says Naomi sarcastically, biting back a smirk. Tequila still spurring her on, she throws Emily a wink. The redhead grins and raises her eyebrows in response.

"Well then, I'm just gonna have to prove ya wrong, yeah?" he says, before grabbing Emily's hand and pulling her into a tango of sorts. The blonde ignores another surge of anger that rises within her at his action and instead gestures JJ to join them. Does what she does best when she doesn't know how to cope with something. Ignores it.

And it works. For most of the night, the four of them dance and drink and laugh and just generally have a good time. Naomi gives in and has several more shots, which leaves her with a pleasant buzz to last her throughout the night. Effy does reappear in her mind at some point, but is promptly pushed aside in favour in the buzz. Eventually she's left with just Emily for company after Cook and JJ volunteer to go and get more drinks. She's dancing with her now, and saying that they're a bit pissed is an understatement – Naomi's pretty sure her costume's all over the place by this stage, but with the alcohol to satiate her she doesn't even care. Emily likewise looks a little bit off-centre, yet still maintains that effortless glow she always manages to exude.

A new song comes on, and before Naomi can get into this new rhythm Emily leans in towards her. "So, which are you? Good cop or bad cop?" she asks in a low voice. She pulls back and Naomi spots a mischievous glint in her eye. It causes her stomach to clench, although she manages to keep her expression in check.

"Hmm..." she murmurs, pretending to think it over. "I dunno...what do _you_ think?" she says, cocking a wicked eyebrow of her own. Emily pauses, then cocks her head to one side. Naomi doesn't speak while the redhead surveys her, examines her. Suddenly feels small under that inquisitive gaze. Exposed. But then Emily's trademark smile returns to her face and she reaches upward.

"I think–", she says, before tugging at the halo atop her head, "–you're a good cop" she finishes, before removing Naomi's police hat and replacing it with the halo. She swiftly replaces her own headgear with Naomi's, tugging the hat down over her crimson hair and giggling playfully.

Naomi scoffs and narrows her eyes. "What makes you think that?" she asks, her tone light and lazy from the drink. She begins to sway drunkenly to this new tune, so fails to register the sudden change in Emily's demeanour. Only notices it after a couple of moments upon realizing that her question has gone unanswered. "Ems?" she enquires, and looks back at Emily. Feels her chest tighten at the sudden dark look that's appeared on Emily's normally glowing face. The girl looks entirely sober all of a sudden.

"It's something about you" Emily eventually says, although it's said in such a low tone that Naomi is forced to lean down to hear her. "I think you try and act to come across as all tough, but in reality you're nice. You're a good person". The blonde gulps. Pulls back and tries to keep a composed expression, although there's a barrage of noise now booming around inside her skull. Not unlike earlier, with Effy. But before she can even begin to detach one thought from the other, she chooses to meet those brown eyes. The brown eyes that are now ducked beneath the cap on Emily's head. "You make a good friend, Naomi" the redhead murmurs softly then, and an overtly cheerful smile is tagged onto the end of her words. Naomi doesn't react. Merely nods, as if in conformation.

Friend. Yes.

But still, this doesn't change anything. So, with the alcohol being the only thing that's pushing her on at the moment, Naomi reaches out and grabs Emily's hand. Allows a lazy smile to spread over her face as she pulls the girl forward and dances with her to the song playing. Glimpses the happy smile that returns to Emily's face and feels lighter. Carefree once more. She twirls Emily underneath the kaleidoscopic lights, succumbing to the alcohol's numbing power again. They bump and knock into each other repeatedly, and Naomi listens to Emily's musical laugh when they do. And it's nice. It's easy again.

Except it doesn't last. As they're dancing to another song – a slower, more melodic one that's not unlike something 'Silverflux' would play – Emily loses her footing in her inebriety. Trips and falls into Naomi, who reflexively reaches out to catch her. And suddenly the little redhead is pressed against Naomi's chest, and her flesh is tingling. Sizzling. Her breath constricts in her throat as the music suddenly becomes muffled to her ears. All she breathes, sees, feels is Emily cushioned against her. But the moment doesn't last long enough – Emily quickly regathers herself and pushes herself back onto her unstable heels. They're suddenly back on this crowded dancefloor, and Naomi doesn't like it.

Emily lets out an unnaturally high giggle. "Oops" she slurs once she's fully upright. "That's one shot too many" she mumbles, laughing even more. She catches Naomi's eye and smiles widely, except the blonde can only return it with a hasty grimace. Doesn't know what to do, what to say. Her head is spinning, and not because of the tequila.

She hesitates. Takes a deep breath and ignores the heady smell that accompanies it. Attempts to say something, anything, but never gets the chance. Because of Cook. Cook appears, like a drunken apparition, and pounces on a poor unsuspecting Emily. JJ brings up the rear, two plastic cups in his hands. Liquid sloshes about over their rims with the commotion around them.

"Oy oy girls! Ya miss me?" he asks them both loudly, although his leer is directed at Emily. "C'mon Emilio man, ya promised Cookie another dance remember?" he says to Emily, and she giggles at him. Catches Naomi's eye and shrugs, before being whisked off by Cook.

JJ joins Naomi. "Sorry for the delay. The queue for the bar was horrendously long. If it weren't for your friend Cook and his vehement impatience, we probably wouldn't have gotten anything at all. Oh well. Here's your drink Naomi...uh, Naomi? Naomi?"

But Naomi doesn't hear him, because her eyes are instead glued to the scene before her. Where her best mate is twirling Emily. Eyeballing Emily lecherously. And Emily is beaming and laughing back. And that anger is returning, even stronger and more powerful than before. So she takes that inopportune moment to look away, and instead falls headfirst into Effy's iron gaze. Fuck knows where she's been all this time or what she's been doing; her ethereal, beacon-like form is currently stood on a platform that's leveled slightly above them. There's a crowd of people dancing away behind her, yet she remains eerily still as if they weren't there. She manages to look unusually menacing in her devil costume, despite the glow that still emanates from her.

She doesn't look angry. Doesn't look disappointed or pained. She's merely staring straight at Naomi, probably trying to read what's going on in her scattered mind. Yet despite the almost prophetic powers the girl possesses, the blonde's sure it's pretty easy to tell what's going on with her. Easy to tell that she's confused and slightly scared right now. And she doesn't even attempt to hide it, because resistance against Effy is futile most of the time. Because she's now no longer looking at things through rose-tinted glasses. She's seeing things as they are at last, and she curses herself for not letting herself see it from the very beginning.

Emily. She fancies Emily.

.

* * *

.

_*Cue Hallelujah music*_

_..._

_Well, there ya have it. Not the most Christmas-y of chapters, but hey – I have to stick to the timeline! So...Naomi finally figured it out. 'Bout time, huh? Haha. Well, I wasn't actually aiming to make her seem blind or dense to what she was feeling for Emily. That'll be explained more in the next chapter, and hopefully it'll make more sense then. Or maybe you'll still think she's stupid. Whatevs._

_Anywho, feel free to let me know what you thought. Cheers. x_


	8. Under the Skin

_Merry Christmas Everyone! :) x_

_I don't own Skins, yada yada yada._

.

* * *

.

She feels her stare before she sees it. Senses her, just watching. Observing. Feels a small, knowing smile pull at her lips as she drags her eyes up from her newspaper article.

"What?" she asks somewhat impatiently, yet still lightheartedly.

Emily continues to stare at her, but still doesn't look away. Seems somewhat amused by Naomi's feverish response. "Nothing" she replies innocently. Pulls her hand up under her chin and leans on it. "Whatcha reading?" she asks playfully, that renowned sparkle shining in her eyes. The sight of it causes Naomi's smile to widen even more, but she masks the fluttering she's feeling in her stomach with a shake of the head.

"Just a two page-long article over how fucked our economy is. That's nothing new though, is it?" she says indifferently, rustling the paper for emphasis. Emily lets out a breathy giggle and Naomi bites her lip. She loves listening to Emily's laugh. Not that she'd ever let the redhead know. Let anyone know. Instead she folds over the paper and places it flat on the table, now bored with it. Watches Emily take a sip from her coffee mug and wrap her thin fingers around it to protect her hands from the cold. Flinches at the sudden idea of touching her fingers to see how cold they are. _No Naomi. Just friends, remember?_ her brain scolds her as she hastily swallows and averts her eyes. "So...do you have another class?" the blonde asks next, eager to redirect her attention.

She glances up and sees Emily shake her head. Sees her tuck a loose strand of her bright red hair behind her ear. "No, not today. Normally I would, at two. But our class took a trip to a gallery yesterday so our lecturer's given us this free time to work on an assessment he gave us about it". She raises her cup, as if to toast Naomi. "As you can see, I'm making great progress" she says with an impish smirk.

Naomi grins. "Maybe you find me more important than your silly assignments" she jokes, but fails to catch the meaning of her statement in time. She meets Emily's eye tentatively and sees – with relief – that the redhead's smirk has softened.

"Maybe I do" she replies in that infamously husky voice, before tugging Naomi's paper out form underneath her arm and unfurling it to read. Once her face is thoroughly and properly hidden behind the broadsheet, Naomi allows a pensive little smile to tweak at her cheeks.

Emily. This is classic Emily; the redhead has this uncanny ability to know when to drop something. When to leave something to lie. Even though Naomi's twice as self-conscious about what she says around the girl, it almost feels as if she doesn't need to be so cautious. Because Emily merely observes and keeps to herself. She doesn't use Naomi's slip-ups as ammunition. Doesn't need to. Because that's what a good friend does. It's one of the most appealing things about her, the blonde finds.

Too bad Emily doesn't know the truth. That Naomi sees her as more than a friend, now.

It feels like it all happened so suddenly, yet so agonizingly slowly at the same time. There she was on that Halloween night a few weeks ago, standing like a mute statue in the middle of that crowded dancefloor, and suddenly her revelation came and punched its way into her gut. She's attracted to Emily. She fucking fancies the pants off her. And underneath it all, it's as if she knew the whole time. Like Emily had ingrained herself into Naomi's being from that very first meeting. From when they clumsily bumped into each other on that second floor corridor. Yet here she was having coffee with Emily as if she didn't want to reach out and hold her hand and kiss her and generally just do something, anything, that constituted more than friendship. Because she can't. Because she doesn't know what this means. For Emily. For herself.

It's complicated. All she can do is think back to when her and Effy first got together. It seems so long ago now, and it's even further blurred by all those drink and drug-fueled nights they shared throughout their time together. But somehow Naomi can still remember them...her and Effy, just...happening. There was no set 'moment' of union. No agreement. Perhaps it was all set off by one flirtatious glance across a dancefloor; one more-than-friendly touch at a house party; one whispered innuendo in the other's ear. And that was that. That's how _they _happened. That was them.

But Emily...this thing with Emily is different. With Effy, it's this raw, passionate, white-hot_ heat _they have. One look and Naomi was usually gone, only to wake up in a flurry of sex-soaked sheets the next morning. Yet that heat also burned out frequently, leaving them free to do their own thing. Free to be their own people. With Emily, it feels like a new kind of heat entirely. Something the blonde has never felt before. The need to be around her, close to her. The wanting, the pressure to be a better person around Emily, _for _Emily. She doesn't know what to make of it all. Doesn't know what to do with this new, unknown feeling. She can recall that angry, horrible emotion she experienced on that dancefloor – Cook grinding and pressing into Emily, Cook's leering and lusty glances at her. It had made Naomi feel sick, made her feel sad. Except she eventually found a name for that emotion. Jealousy. She'd been jealous of Cook, jealous that he got to openly touch Emily and she couldn't. She'd never felt it so badly before. Not even with Effy, so she didn't recognize it at the time. She'd had stings of it, little passing moments when it came to Effy. But their situation meant that she didn't normally end up caring about what the brunette was doing for too long. So this heat, the jealousy over Emily...it almost feels as if the girl's burrowed her way into Naomi's senses, crawled her way under the blonde's skin. And now Naomi can't get rid of her. Yet she doesn't know if she wants to be rid of her.

Naomi sighs quietly to herself, her chest deflating. It doesn't matter what she feels, though. Because there's several issues with what she feels for the redheaded girl sitting across from her, although she chooses to focus on the main two.

One; she and Effy – in whatever way you want to look at it – are together. And two; even if Emily _was_ somehow capable of feeling something in return for her, it's made all the more difficult because – as far as Naomi knows – Emily isn't gay.

Those two issues aren't huge, admittedly. Hers and Effy's 'thing' having no labels means they're technically free to do as they wish. But Naomi just can't bring herself to cross that line, especially on something as confusing as this. Sure, she doesn't even know if Effy has cheated herself. Doesn't really care, to be honest. But Naomi cares about what she does _herself_, and that's what matters. And Emily's sexuality...well, it _should _be quite easy to ask, surely? Or maybe ask in some indirect, roundabout way – _"hey Emily, what do you think of that girl over there?" _she could ask about some attractive random. Her answer could prove to be Naomi's answer – "Okay" or "Pretty", straight. "Hot", "Sexy" or "Gorgeous", gay. Simple...Well, maybe not _that _simple. Nevertheless, things would become even more complicated if Naomi found out. And what with all the other stuff she's dealing with emotionally, she figures not knowing that little tidbit of information might provide her with some relief.

"Hey" Emily says suddenly, snapping Naomi out of her heavy thought-process. She glances up and sees the girl still reading the paper, smiling widely. "What Star Sign are you?" she asks, her brown eyes not looking up.

The blonde snorts. "Taurus" she replies unenthusiastically.

Emily takes another drink from her mug and the blonde watches as her eyes flicker down the page and stop at a certain spot. Then the redhead clears her throat. "Things at this point in time are confusing and unclear for you, Taurus" she reads aloud in an exaggerated voice. Naomi bites her lip. _You can say that again, _she thinks. She catches Emily's eye for a brief moment and sees a cheeky smile colour the girl's face. Raises an eyebrow as Emily looks back at the passage. "Your ambition is set to drive you forward when it comes to your goals, and this drive shall get you far in your area of work. The same can't be said for that of your love life, however". Emily lets out a false gasp at that part, to which Naomi rolls her eyes and scoffs. "Matters of the heart are set to take a turn towards the worse soon, so prepare yourself. Things should look up in this aspect of your life eventually, but until then keep your friends and those close to you nearby. They may prove to be just what you need in these times of turmoil". Emily sets down the page then and shoots Naomi a grave look. "Now, Naomi–", She grabs the blonde's hand and pats it, "–I just want you to know that I'm here for you in these difficult times–"

"Fuck off!" Naomi interrupts, laughing and shooing Emily's hand away. The redhead laughs heartily whilst pulling away, and in the meantime Naomi hastily tries to conceal the flustered look that's appeared on her face at the feeling of Emily's hand having been clasped in hers. Tries to repress the butterflies fluttering around her stomach. Instead fixes the redhead with a bemused stare. "You shouldn't be reading those things. They're a load of shit" she says irritatedly, quietly reveling in the giddy look on Emily's face as the girl calms herself.

The redhead eventually hushes her laughter and shrugs. "I know they're a load of rubbish, but I just read them for fun. Actually, one or two have been quite accurate, funnily enough" she says matter-of-factly.

"Coincidence" the blonde retorts, eyebrow cocked. "I don't believe in all that fate and karma and psychic crap. Seems like a scam to me". She crosses her arms haughtily and tries to bite back a smirk at the indifferent expression that flashes across the redhead's face.

Emily runs a hand through her hair then, which leaves it all tussled and tangled around her face. Naomi tries not to concentrate on how attractive it makes her look, and instead focuses on the girl's lips which are now parted to speak. "I don't either, really. Although I do believe in karma a little bit" she replies, to which the blonde scoffs again. Those brown eyes flicker up to meet Naomi's cool blue ones. "But it doesn't hurt to have a laugh about it, right? You can't take life so seriously, Naomes" she murmurs casually. Naomi winces in shock. Feels her heart suddenly expand in her chest, but makes sure to keep her face emotionless.

"Naomes?" she questions disbelievingly, unable to hold back her smirk this time. A brief look of surprise flashes across Emily's face, only to be quickly replaced by that detached look once more.

"You've been calling me Ems a lot lately. I shouldn't be the only one with a nickname" she explains, again in that casual tone. Naomi hesitates. _Ems? I don't remember calling her that,_ she thinks in confusion to herself, trying to recall a time where she uttered that affectionate pet name. Can't think of any particular instance, although she vaguely remembers the name drifting past her lips whilst drunk. Maybe even on that fateful Halloween night. Typical that alcohol had something to do with it. _Fuck's sake Naomi...you're trying so hard to keep Emily in the dark about what you're feeling, and then you come out with that? Smooth, fucking smooth, _she hastens to scold herself again, abruptly feeling quite hot around the collar.

Before she's forced to come up with some petty attempt at conversation however, Emily suddenly takes a long chug from her cup and then pulls out her phone. Scrunches up her brow upon glimpsing the screen. "Agh...suppose I better go. I've been procrastinating too long" she says in a defeated voice. She lazily gets to her feet and pulls up her bag from the ground with a sigh.

Naomi masks the disappointment she suddenly feels at Emily leaving and instead grins widely at her. "Maybe I've been distracting you too long" she reasons cleverly, quirking her eyebrow again. Emily snorts at the throwback to earlier and rolls her eyes. Bites her lip and begins to shuffle, clearly hesitating over something. "What?" Naomi asks at her discomfort, her tone kind. The redhead smiles then, and abruptly she seems decided. So Naomi watches as Emily walks around the little coffee table. Watches as she leans down. Feels thin yet strong arms wrap around her shoulders, clutching tight. Inadvertently breathes in Emily's sweet and utterly enticing scent. A hug. They're hugging.

But as soon as Naomi comprehends this little fact, it's over; Emily pulls back and smiles again, although Naomi can't help but notice that her cheeks are a little flushed now. "Talk to you later, Naomes" she says with a wink, before turning around and heading towards the coffee shop door. Naomi watches the tails of her crimson hair dance behind her while she moves away, until a moment later when they're gone out the door along with Emily. Then she's once more left with her own heavy, cumbersome thoughts for company.

_I just hugged Emily, _she first thinks in disbelief, and feels her heart swell. Okay, so it wasn't exactly a great achievement or anything. She's not really a hugger, either. But despite her and Emily being friends, they hadn't hugged yet. Such a simple gesture, so simple an act – yet it held all the significance in the world for the blonde. She finally got to touch, to _hold_ the girl who's been invading her thoughts on daily basis as of late. But then reality quickly comes in and sweeps her triumph out from underneath her. Because she knows she can never expect anything more from Emily. Whether she wanted it or not.

They're friends. That's all.

So she just sits there. Contemplates what she's going to do next, now that Emily's gone. She doesn't have anywhere to be, not until later at least – 'Silverflux' are supposed to meet up at Cook's to rehearse, and she doesn't have much to do in the meantime. So, of course, her mind ends up drifting back to Emily within no time at all. She wonders where the redhead's gone, what she's planning to do. Probably going to do some work, unlike herself. Then she thinks about how nice Emily looked today – messy and sprawled hair about her shoulders; hefty and warm looking clothes around her small frame, which probably did her many favours in this cold weather; light and subtle makeup, which brought out those brown doe eyes which Naomi so adored about the girl. But the one thing Naomi can't help but notice about Emily most of all – not just today, but all the time – is that she always manages to brighten a room. With her smile. With her deep, husky voice. With her melodic laughter. _Jesus, way to sound like a lovesick puppy, _she realizes then, and giggles quietly to herself.

But then a smile forcibly makes its way onto her face. She bends down and ruffles through her bag, eventually pulling out her A4 pad and a pen. And with the sudden strike of inspiration that's now hit her, she begins to write.

.

She grabs the bottom of the heavy garage door and pulls up, hard. Groans with the exertion of it until it's finally locked into place above her head. Then looks down and sees Cook ahead of her, adjusting the amps. He glances up at the amount of noise she's made. "Ah Naomikins, you're here!" he says cheerfully, still not dropping the wires in his hands. "All set for a bitta practice, or did ya just come here for a willy waggle?" he asks, his tone mischievous.

Naomi rolls her eyes and steps inside. Then lets the door down after her and tosses her satchel aside. "I'll pass on the second offer, thanks" she snaps, smirk firmly in place. Cook shrugs, clearly not bothered by her rejection. The blonde glances around. "Freds and Effy not here yet?" she asks.

Cook shakes his head and sets down the wires. "Naw, not yet. Freddie's on his way, said his lecture ran late. And Eff...well, she's usually with you in' she?"

His tone isn't accusing, just genuinely curious, yet Naomi feels the sudden need to defend herself. "I wasn't with Effy. I was with Emily" she murmurs, her tone harsher than she intends it to be. Cook looks up at her again, surprise colouring his features for a moment.

"Oh. Okay" he says quietly, his expression becoming unreadable all of a sudden.

Her blue eyes narrow. "What?" she barks, her brow furrowing. _Emily's my friend. Of course I'm allowed to spend time with my friends. What does Cook know anyway, the lazy cu–_

"Nothing" he says quickly, running a hand through his sandy hair. Then his expression changes, and his familiar cheeky grin is now back in place. "So, how is Emilio anyway? Still looking smokin', I bet" he enquires, wiggling his eyebrows.

_Yes, _her brain agrees at once, although she daren't say so out loud. "She's fine" the blonde answers curtly, now walking towards the set. She distracts herself with her guitar, which is perched atop it's stand towards the edge of their dingy little stage. She picks it up and plucks through a few notes, only to grimace at how out of tune it is. "Jesus" she groans, rolling her eyes. She begins tweaking at the tuning pegs, figuring she has nothing better to do whilst waiting for Effy and Freddie to arrive. Figures it's better than being grilled by Cook, whether it be intentional or not.

They spend the next ten minutes or so in silence, the only noise being Naomi and Cook testing their instruments. Eventually, Cook says, "I've booked us another gig. It's in the middle of December, not long before Christmas". Naomi strums through the chords of one of their songs, then looks up at him and nods her approval.

"Nice one, Cook" she says, impressed. "Where is it?"

Cook sighs. "Not too far off the city centre, actually. In a place called 'The Blue-Room'. Which means it's gonna be hella busy, especially 'round Christmas time. We don't have a lot of time to practice between now and then. So that means we have to start playing our arses off, Blondie, 'cause we have to be fuckin' good" he says sternly, almost critically.

She recoils slightly. "Jeez Cook, take it easy! We'll get it done" she tries to reason, although she can't help but feel a bit nervous at the prospect of playing to such a large amount of people.

Her attempt at comfort falls on deaf ears; Cook thuds heavily on his drum with his drumstick, as if trying to drown her out. Then his dark, beady eyes meet her cool blue ones across the space between them. "I hope so" he says in a hushed voice. Then he exhales harshly. "I just want to do somethin' new, y'know? Just, wow the crowd maybe". He squints at her. "Any bright ideas, Naomi? I've told Eff and Freds to keep thinking about stuff we could do, but you're usually the one with the plans around 'ere". He grins widely, pleadingly then. Naomi bites her lip. Suddenly finds her neck growing flushed, as an idea indeed hits her.

"Well, actually..." she mumbles, before hesitating. Then she pulls off her strap from around her neck and places her guitar down. Hurries over to where she discarded her bag and rummages through it, eventually pulling out a piece of paper. "I was in college earlier and was thinking about stuff so I, um..." she feebly explains, before simply handing Cook the page. He takes it from her and casts his eyes over it. Her mistakes have been scrawled all over the flimsy bit of paper, each failed attempt now crossed out with ugly black marks. But Cook's gaze is now hastily flickering through her final draft. The only draft she didn't find was absolute and utter rubbish. After what feels like an eternity of silence however, Naomi begins to feel self-conscious. Wishes she'd never shown him the page in the first place. "Cook, it's fine, we...we don't have to use it. I was daydreaming earlier and I just...well, I know it's probably shit. Just forget about it" she says in a rush, leaning forward to grab the crumpled piece of paper from Cook's hand. Although when she attempts to do so, Cook jerks his hand out of the way. Her eyebrows rise up her forehead. "Cook seriously, give it to me and I'll throw it away–"

"I dunno what you're talking about Blondie" he says in a strangely even voice, before getting to his feet. "This...I see no shit here. This is fuckin' ace!" he exclaims then, giving her a hard slap to the shoulder. She's so stunned by what he says that she barely notices the pain of his touch – she stares at him, openly dumbfounded.

"Wha...I mean, what are you on about?" she asks disbelievingly.

Her friend chuckles heartily then and shakes his head excitedly. "What I'm _on about_, Naomi, is that this is some good writing 'ere. Writing that we can _use. _Hell, maybe we'll even put it into our lineup for 'The Blue-Room', yeah?"

She pauses. Almost can't believe what she's hearing. Sure, she's written a lot of their bands stuff before, but the song she'd just handed to Cook was the one she wrote earlier. The one that was written whilst thinking mainly of Emily. And, according to Cook, it's actually _good. _Huh. "You...you really think it's okay?" she asks, her voice quite low and timid.

Cook laughs loudly again and reaches out to ruffle her hair. "Yeah Naomikins, I do. Don't get me wrong, we're probably gonna have to change some stuff around. Plus, we have to add a melody. But yeah, I think it's really good. Like, poetic or summit..." he says, his expression becoming contemplative. Naomi cracks a smile. Feels inexplicably proud of herself.

They're discussing possible sounds for the song, what kind of song it'll be like – slow or fast, harsh or soft – when the garage door opens once more. Freddie and Effy appear from behind it a moment later, with Freddie's long arms holding the door above his head. "Sorry we're late guys" he says apologetically as the brunette walks past him and he shuts the door. "First the late lecture, then a late bus. You know the way it is. Then I ran into Effy so...anyway, we're here!" he blurts out in a rush, marching quickly towards Cook's couch at the back of the garage. Naomi watches Freddie until he flops his lanky form onto the sofa, but when she looks around once more it's to see Effy's piercing blue eyes staring directly at the piece of paper in Cook's hand.

"What's that?" she point-blank asks, no hesitancy in her tone. Naomi finds the anxiety she felt earlier rising within her again, although this time for an entirely different reason. But before she can deflect the brunette's attention, Cook starts to wave the sheet around enthusiastically.

"Blondie's only gone and written us a corker!" he says triumphantly, a smug grin plastered on his face. The blonde watches as Effy's eyes narrow imperceptibly, and her anxiety flares up even further.

"Really? Lemme see" she hears from behind her, then glances around to see that Freddie has reappeared and snatched the page from Cook's grip. His eyes quickly scan along the lines and then his face breaks out into a white, crooked grin. "Wow Naomi, this _is _really good" he agrees, his head nodding approvingly. Naomi blushes and smiles awkwardly at the compliment, but then she abruptly remembers Effy. Realizes that the brunette will want to read her lyrics too.

"Pass it over, then" commands Effy calmly then, as if right on cue. Freddie happily hands her the sheet and walks off towards his bass. Cook likewise follows suit and returns to his drumkit, leaving Naomi alone with Effy and her impending verdict on her work.

Her neck has grown hot again. Her palms are slicked with a light coat of sweat. Her heart rate has quickened, and it's only amplified when she sees the slightest of frowns cover Effy's normally stoic features. A frown so small that an ordinary person might not see it, but Naomi was no ordinary person to Effy. She doesn't know why she's feeling so tense over this. The song...it's not overtly telling or honest or anything. It doesn't even mention Emily's name. Okay, so it mentions some of her features perhaps...but nothing that's too incriminating on Naomi's part. Nothing that should spark too much suspicion in most circumstances. Except this is Effy, and Effy always picks up on the first hint of something suspicious.

As if to confirm this notion, the brunette chooses that moment to look up. Her expression hasn't changed even a little, although if Naomi were to be precise then she reckons she can see that those pale eyes are a little darker than before. "Yeah. Creative" she offers in that monotonous voice of hers. Her chapped lips purse together. "When did you write it?" she asks.

Naomi frowns. Is thrown off by the question. Why does it matter _when_ she wrote it? "Eh...this afternoon" she replies, her tone betraying her confusion.

Effy nods, satisfied. "Cool" is all she murmurs, before handing Naomi back the sheet and walking past her to the keyboard. Naomi stands there for a few seconds longer than necessary, trying to see if there was something wrong about her response. There wasn't, at least not to a normal person. But Effy Stonem isn't normal, which means there could've been a number of things wrong about her answer. Things she would never know about, because Effy would never be likely to share such things.

Instead she chooses to ignore it. Lets Effy carry on with her cryptic shit. Like she cares, anyway. So she joins the other three and picks up her guitar, ready to play through their practiced set as usual. Except she can't help but feel Effy's gaze flickering repeatedly over to her, and it throws her off. It was like that night, where Effy's penetrating gaze had bored down on her from that higher platform. Where her gaze had added even more weight to her revelation over Emily. But she hadn't voiced her thoughts. Hadn't breathed a word of her discovery to anyone. And if Effy had seen her change in demeanour, sensed her discomfort and fear over the redhead, she hadn't said anything. They'd gone home together that night. Went to bed together. Fucked. Fell asleep together. And then things had carried on as normal. They'd been okay. They'd been them. So why does Naomi suddenly feel like _that_ – their whole system – isn't good enough right now?

"Righ' lads, we're gonna have to come up with a tune to Naomi's new song. I want us to give the audience at this next gig somethin' to remember" Cook's voice rings out after a few minutes once they've gone over they're intro song. The four of them all stare at each other dumbly, with none of them having a clue where to start. But then Naomi thinks of something.

"I have an idea of how we could start" she mumbles quietly, and sees an eager look appear on Cook's face. Then her eyes inadvertently cross over to Effy, and she sees that the brunette's stance is challenging. Daring. And Naomi inexplicably thinks of Emily, and finds herself wanting to meet Effy's challenge. Finds herself not wanting to disappoint either of them. So she plays.

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	9. Double Vision

_I don't own Skins, but if I did I'd be writing scripts instead of fics!_

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* * *

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A puff of smoke leaves Freddie's lips and she watches as it wafts up into the cool Winter's air above them. Her eyes linger on the spot where it evaporates before slowly looking back down at her friend. His spliff is hanging limply from his fingers and he's wearing a lazy grin.

Naomi takes a drag from her own joint and frowns. "What?" she asks him, her voice dry and cracked.

He chuckles. The tone of it is low. "Your hair is blonde". Another drag. "Like, _really _blonde".

Naomi quirks an eyebrow. Has to keep herself from smiling. "Oh, well spotted. I've only had it like this since the entire time you've known me" she snaps back, although with a light-hearted edge to her words.

Freddie snorts. Flicks some ash onto the pavement by his feet and then rests the arm which holds his spliff across his bent knee. "I didn't mean it like that" he murmurs. "I just meant that it's really bright. Would you ever think about changing it?" he asks, and it would've almost sounded like an intellectual question if it weren't for the glazed look in his eyes.

Naomi shrugs. Hasn't really thought about the question before. Decides to answer honestly. "Dunno. One day, maybe. But I like it like this right now. It's kind of...eye-catching, no?" She wiggles her eyebrows and tries to keep a straight face, but the effort doesn't last long – the weed has made her brain all fuzzy, and at that moment she fails miserably to keep herself from giggling. A squeaky, almost girlish laugh erupts from her lips as she sways a little where she sits. Then she looks up again to see Freddie smirking at her.

"Quite eye-catching babe, yeah – blonde hair, nice tits. My kinda girl" he says evenly, sending her a cheeky wink. Naomi bites her lip and grimaces. Leans forward and gives Freddie a hard shove. "Ow, that was a compliment!" he exclaims as she pulls away.

She takes another lengthy drag and eyes him squarely, again trying to force down a laugh. "Yeah well, you might wanna watch it. I think the spliff's loosened your tongue a bit" she replies cuttingly, but with a smile all the same. Freddie merely shakes his head and ruffles a hand through his mop head of hair.

She knows he's only messing with her. Their relationship has always been sort of lazy and banterous like this. They just click. Hence why they'd decided to room together. She's known Freddie since school, back in a place called Roundview. In fact, all four of them had been in the same year – her, Cook, Freds and Effy. They'd set up the band not long after they'd finished their A-levels. While she always felt slightly guarded with Cook and Effy – Cook with his lewdness, Effy with her omniscience – it wasn't really ever like that with Freddie. He was kind of a happy-go-lucky sort of guy, and things tended to be very simple with him. I mean, who else could she just sit and have a spliff with whilst sitting at the back end of some college building? Not many, that's for sure.

"Although" she hears him say, and glances back over at him. He's just pulling his joint away from his mouth again, and there's an expression of quiet amusement on his face whilst he exhales. "I don't think you really need to catch anybody's eye Naomi...I mean, Eff's well into you isn't she?" he says, and she feels her brow frown slightly at the unreadable look that appears in his eyes. "Unless," he says next, swiftly covering up his falter, "you were trying to catch someone _else's _eye?" he says lightly, wiggling his eyebrows and chuckling deeply once more. Naomi grimaces in spite of herself. Tries to ignore the flash of red that immediately pops up in her mind at Freddie's words and instead rolls her eyes.

"As if, Freddie" she snaps, and falls silent. Briefly considers expanding on her reply, but decides against it. That would only warrant questions, and the last thing she needs is a stoned Freddie Mclair asking her useless and probing questions. Especially if she isn't exactly sure whether she'd be able to answer them. Instead she takes one final toke from her spliff, extinguishes it, and puts the butt back into her ciggie pack. Then she shakily gets to her feet. Her vision shakes along with her movement. "C'mon, I think you've had enough brain cells killed for one day" she jokes, extending a limp hand for him to take. He too pockets his spliff butt and takes her hand, lazily pulling himself to his feet and groaning.

"Fuck off" he retorts. Then pauses. "I'm smart" he insists, although unconvincingly. Naomi giggles again. The weed is still keeping a goofy smile planted firmly across her face.

"Sure you are" she mumbles, although in a lacklustre fashion. Freddie merely shoves her playfully, before they both gather their bags and leave the cozy little passageway they'd been occupying for the past hour or so. They walk slowly towards the main square. The world around them suddenly seems much mellower and pleasant than before. A thought crosses her mind and she scoffs loudly. Bumps into Freddie's side as they walk. "You're screwed, you know" she says, suddenly remembering that Freddie has another class later and she, thankfully, doesn't.

His arm shrugs alongside her own. "Wouldn't be the first time I was stoned during a class, Naomi. You should know me better by this stage" he says casually, and Naomi looks up at him with a wry grin. _Oh Freds, _she thinks disbelievingly, yet affectionately at the same time. _You're such a lovable waster. _

They're approaching the square then, laughing and chatting idly, when Naomi's attention is abruptly pulled to the side. There, leaning against one of the college buildings, stands Emily. Only it's not Emily as Naomi's known her – she looks different. So much so that Naomi stops dead in her tracks and openly gawps at her.

"Naomi?" questions Freddie in confusion, having stopped a few paces ahead of her. "Something up?"

But Naomi doesn't really register his concern. In fact, before she even realizes it, her feet have started walking of their own accord towards her friend. "Hey!" she calls out upon her approach, waving manically. _Fuck's sake. What are you doing? _her brain scolds as she walks, but the drugs in her system hastily quieten the critical voice. The drugs also cause her to act like an overenthusiastic fool, but she doesn't care. Doesn't care that her hidden feelings towards Emily may be on full display right now. She'll blame it on the drugs. Simple.

Emily vaguely looks around at the sound of Naomi's voice, but apparently doesn't notice her. Naomi walks quicker now, a smile widening across her face and her waving becoming more erratic. "Hey" she says breathlessly once again as she comes within speaking distance of the girl. Emily looks up at her greeting, definitely seeing her this time. A look of confusion flits across her face, and Naomi is thrown off for a moment. But then she redirects her attention to Emily's appearance. The difference she initially spotted is all the more prominent at this distance – she sees that Emily's clothes are bit more...out-there today. She's wearing closed-toe high heels; a very short skirt; lace tights and a leopard-print cardigan. Her makeup is a little bolder than it normally is. But...her hair. It's the hair that first drew Naomi over; gone are the shiny, crimson red locks that so alighted the blonde's imagination and in its place are strands of a deep purple. Naomi fails to notice Emily's look of growing confusion and instead blurts out, "Wow!"

Emily's brow furrows and she smirks exasperatedly. "What?" she replies shortly.

Naomi gestures uselessly at Emily's form. The weed that's still coursing through her system is causing her thoughts to become temporarily muddled. "You...you look so different" she says ineptly, smiling and shaking her head disbelievingly. The former redhead raises an eyebrow, and Naomi backtracks. "I mean, I like it! It's nice, I mean, uh...you look nice. The hair, I mean, wow...it's really different" she babbles, slapping her arms back to her sides stupidly. Emily snorts and rolls her eyes, and Naomi feels her heart sink.

"Okay...whatever" she says dismissively, before turning away from Naomi and literally giving her the cold-shoulder.

Naomi just stands there, her mind reeling. Wonders with dismay as to why Emily is being so short and cold with her. She hasn't done anything, has she? _No, _she concludes quickly, knowing that she definitely doesn't deserve this sort of treatment. From a close friend, no less. Okay sure, Naomi wasn't exactly the most cheerful or optimistic of people at times...but surely she doesn't deserve this sort of coldness from Emily? She hasn't even done anything wrong. And normally she'd act just as indifferently in this situation and walk away. But this was Emily. And that sole fact makes her stay. Makes the indignance she feels pour from her lips.

"What the fuck is your problem?" she blurts out in a rush, her befuddled mind causing her words to jumble. Emily's gaze snaps to hers again, and gone is that look of exasperation and in its place lies an incensed look. It momentarily stuns Naomi. She wasn't sure Emily possessed a look like that.

"My problem is," the former redhead begins, talking a few threatening paces towards Naomi, "that some blonde bimbo has come up and tried to talked to me when all I want is to be left alone, yeah? Or can you not understand that through that obviously thick skull of yours?" she says cuttingly, lisping apparent throughout her rant. Naomi abruptly realizes that she wasn't aware of Emily having a lisp. _Well, apparently that's not the only thing I don't know about her, _she thinks sombrely, and can't help the feeling of hurt that tugs at her then. This thought makes her anger flare up again, but before she gets the chance to retort she hears someone speak from behind her.

"Um, Naomi? Is everything alright here?" asks Freddie's soft yet slightly worried voice. The blonde looks around and sees a look of concern in Freddie's thoroughly glazed brown eyes. She doesn't know what to do. The spliff should, if anything, be subduing her anger...yet her hurt feels just as sharp and painful as if her mind were as clear as day. Sure, Emily and her weren't _anything_...they were mates, they would only _ever_ be mates, but...despite her own uncaring nature, she finds herself disappointed by Emily's complete disregard for her feelings.

She breathes in deeply. "Oh yeah Freds, everything's fine". She looks back to glare at Emily. "My friend's being a bitch to me for no fucking reason, that's all". Emily growls loudly and shakes her head in exasperation, which if anything incenses Naomi even more. This is why she doesn't make friends. This is why she doesn't let people in. The fall hurts too much.

"I'm not your fucking friend you twat!" Emily yells, lisp flaring up once more. "What the fuck are you on about you dozy cow? Leave me alone!"

Naomi feels her cheeks growing hot. Her palms growing sweaty. And the final, fatal blow is about to leave her lips when suddenly, out of nowhere–

"KATIE!"

Both of their heads whirl round – as well as Freddie's, presumably – and Naomi has to keep her jaw from dropping at the sight she's met with. Running towards them is, unmistakably, the figure of Emily Fitch. The Emily Fitch that Naomi_ knows..._with her familiar crimson red hair bobbing along behind her as she hurries towards them. But...if _that's_ Emily, then who's...

Naomi's shaken blue eyes come to rest on the girl she'd previously assumed was Emily. On closer inspection – sans her anger or giddiness – the blonde suddenly realizes that this girl is most definitely not Emily. She looks very much like her, yes. Except with subtle differences. Her face is slightly rounder. Her lips are a bit more pouted. She holds an air of confidence and arrogance about her that Emily does not. Before she can come to a conclusion however, Emily finally reaches them all. Naomi feels her stomach flutter despite herself; her affection towards the girl swells at the sight of the redhead's flushed and blotchy face whilst she recovers from her exertion. Quite a contrast to how the blonde felt towards her a moment ago.

"Katie..." Emily repeats, her husky voice breathless. "What's...what's going on?" she asks, and Naomi can't help but notice the edge of panic in her voice. Naomi meets the stranger's – presumably named Katie – gaze again. Her irritated stance has now been replaced with a look of amusement.

She clears her throat. "Well Emsy" she says smoothly. "This weirdo girl here wouldn't leave me alone. So I gave her a piece of my mind" she explains rather frankly. Naomi feels her eyebrows rise up her forehead. Is surprised by the girl's blunt honesty. Glances back towards Emily and sees that the girl looks conflicted. Her brown eyes flicker up to meet Naomi's shyly, and the blonde sees that they're duller than they usually are.

"Naomes...this is Katie. She's my twin sister" Emily says in a quiet voice, gesturing feebly towards the girl. Naomi's gaze flickers between them both, Emily's words simultaneously spinning around her skull.

Twin. Emily has a twin. _Didn't see that one coming, _her mind voices, and she mentally agrees. "Oh" she breathes out softly, feeling embarrassed all of a sudden. Realizes that she was about to shout down Emily's own flesh and blood. Except then she remembers how cruel the twin had been to her first, and feels her indignance flare up again.

Except then the voice of reason cuts in and speaks for them all. "Well, I guess this has all been one huge misunderstanding" Freddie's calm voice says, and he steps into Naomi's view. He has that trademark lopsided smile on his face, and it's now directed towards the twins. "I don't think we've been introduced. I'm Freddie" he says in his most charming tone. It's almost as if he hadn't been toking up less than a half-hour ago, but then Naomi gets a sudden whiff of that sickly-sweet weed smell as he leans past her to shake both girl's hands respectively. Emily's expression is merely polite as she greets Freddie, but Kathy's – or whatever her name was – looks a little more intrigued by Freddie's presence. The blonde has to keep herself from smirking.

"Honestly Ems, how the hell do you keep meeting such weirdos? First JJ and now her?" Emily's twin abruptly says, gesturing flippantly to Naomi. "She was waving at me like a right git. Couldn't shake her off!" Naomi feels her cheeks blush with embarrassment at that. Not at the insult, but at the jibe over her enthusiasm. But suddenly Katie takes a long sniff and screws up her face. "Ugh, _and _she stinks of spliff! A fucking druggie too? Fuck's sake Em...it's about time I introduce you to some cooler people" she says haughtily. But then Katie's gaze flits to Freddie. "Um...I don't mean you though, Freddie" she hastens to add. Her tone changes imperceptibly then. It's sound is much warmer than when she was addressing Emily and herself. Freddie, predictably, fails to notice; he continues to smile awkwardly and stares blankly at them all.

Naomi expects Emily to share a comeback towards her sister then, but to her surprise the redhead merely offers a feeble, "Piss off Katie", before training her eyes on her shoes. Naomi smirks in disbelief. The spliff has quickly subdued her mood once again, so she now finds the situation she's stuck in rather amusing. Spurred on by this notion, she addresses Katie.

"Well Katie" she starts, her voice impressively light, "unless Emily's willing to ditch me for somebody cooler, I guess you're stuck with me". She extends a friendly hand. "I'm Naomi". Katie stares unsurely down at her hand for a moment or so, but then snorts. Begins to back away and shoots Naomi a disinterested glance.

"Whatever" she snaps. "I don't have time for this. You coming Emsy?" She eyes the redhead questioningly, but Emily has that conflicted look on her face again. She glances up at Naomi and then back towards Katie.

"Just...give me a minute, okay?" she says in a hushed voice, almost pleadingly.

Katie hesitates. Then sighs loudly and rolls her eyes. "Fine. I'll be sitting on that bench over there, yeah?" she says, pointing just ahead of her. "I just hope no other random stoners or weirdos come and disturb me this time" she says, throwing a disdainful yet slightly amused glance at Naomi. Naomi returns it with a tight smile.

"Nice meeting you too" the blonde says, and surprisingly earns a smile from the twin in return. Then Katie walks off towards the bench. A couple of seconds pass in her absence until Naomi remembers Freddie. She turns towards him. "Hey Freds, you mind if I talk to Emily alone for a sec?" she asks.

Freddie waves her off dismissively. "No problem Naomi. I'm gonna go get something to eat anyway. I can feel the munchies coming on" he says lightly, chuckling. "See you later, 'kay? Remember, it's your turn to make dinner tonight". He smiles crookedly at them and turns away, heading in the opposite direction to where Katie went. Presumably towards the nearest shop. Naomi watches him with a fond smile on her face, before turning back around to meet Emily's gaze. Is surprised to see that Emily's withdrawn stance has now disappeared, and in its place is the bright-faced, happy girl she's so used to seeing.

"Sneaky spliff, eh?" Emily questions with a wink, giggling.

Naomi raises an eyebrow in challenge. "Sneaky twin sister, eh?" she counters, and Emily immediately shuts up. The redhead's eyes cast downward again, and the dullness in them return. It puzzles Naomi – how the mere mention of her sister brings out this more subdued version of Emily. She doesn't ask why though. Knows it's none of her business. Instead she probes on the more pressing inquiry. "Why didn't you ever mention her?" she asks kindly, her tone genuinely curious.

Emily hesitates, and it takes a couple of moments before she eventually shrugs pathetically. "I just...I just never felt the need to bring her up, okay? She doesn't go here...she's only visiting me" she explains in that same hushed tone, her voice cracking a bit.

The blonde smiles in spite of herself. The drugs are keeping her loose, so in turn it causes her to remain puzzled as to what Emily's problem is. "Okay. Still thought you might've mentioned having a _twin, _at least. Might have saved me the embarrassment of making such a tit of myself before" she says jokingly, laughing softly. Emily doesn't crack a smile, nor laugh. In fact, Naomi notices her form tense up a tad.

"Yeah well...I don't know about _you _either, really. Why should you know about me and my family when I barely know about yours?" the redhead suddenly snaps, and when she raises her eyes back up to meet Naomi's, the blonde can see a sudden fiery heat in them. It takes her aback. She doesn't know where her friend's sudden frustration has come from. _What's the big deal? _she can't help but wonder while she stands there dumbly.

"Well, I...I mean, uh..." she stammers, feeling abruptly tongue-tied. Like she did when facing what turned out to be Katie. Before she can unscramble her thoughts however, Emily lets out a long sigh. Her stance softens a bit, and her brown eyes flash with regret.

"Look, I'm sorry. Can we discuss this later? I'm going for lunch and then shopping with Katie, and by the looks of it she's going to blow another fuse if I don't get over there right now". Naomi's brow furrows again, and sure enough when she looks around it's to see Emily's sister tapping her foot repeatedly and shuffling impatiently on the bench she's sitting on. She looks back around. Emily's biting her lip apprehensively. "Talk to you later, Naomi" she says, and then walks past the blonde without a second glance back.

Naomi continues to stand there stupidly even after she's gone, and for a moment she's unsure of what to do. The spliff has made her entire reaction-process sluggish, so she doesn't even know what to feel at her friend's abrupt dismissal. Briefly wonders which version of Emily – fake or real – she disliked the most today. Blunt, cutting, bitchy fake Emily – better known as Katie? Or defensive, quiet, closed-off real Emily? She contemplates this for a while as she begins to head for home, and eventually decides that neither tickles her fancy. Although the longer she continues to imagine the torn look that was on Emily's face earlier, the more she veers towards the latter option.

.

A few hours later and Naomi is sitting cross-legged on her bed. She's hunched over a sprawl of books and sheets covering her duvet, her concentration rapidly flickering from one item to the next. Her belly is contently full from the pasta dinner she'd cooked for her and Freddie earlier, and her high from the weed has pretty much worn off by now. There's only the odd bit of swaying to her vision which indicates otherwise, but nonetheless she's fine. At least that means she's not left utterly useless in regards to focusing right now.

The only question is – _what_ to focus on? She's got several different things staring her in the face, the most important including a text analysis assignment and numerous song sheets. _Fuck. Wake up Naomi, _she urges herself as the remaining sluggishness continues to ebb away from her senses. She's torn. On the one hand, she really fucking needs to get this assignment done. It's due in two days. On the other hand, the big 'Blue-Room' gig is only a week away; she needs to have all her riffs and chords down. Especially for one song in particular, which is glaring menacingly out at her at the moment more than any other piece of paper around her. She sighs harshly as her gaze unwillingly falls upon it yet again, and grudgingly snatches it up from underneath one of her folders.

This is the big one. After many hours of brainstorming and practicing, the band eventually came up with a sound to Naomi's song. And not only that, but Cook also came up with an idea they'd never done before – the use of a back-up vocal. It seemed suited for the type of song. Except not just any old vocalist had been picked. Each of them had tried harmonizing along with Effy during the song, but eventually Naomi had been chosen to back Effy up. Their voices compliment each other in terms of the melody, it turns out. It's a soft number; initially it was hard to find a place for it in the set-list, particularly because it was much gentler than their other tunes. But ultimately they made it work. It found a place. But what the others – unfortunately – don't know, is that Naomi is secretly terrified about the prospect of her vocal debut. She knows she has an okay voice – soft and sometimes resonant, although not lead vocal material – but playing an instrument _and_ singing at the same time is an entirely different thing altogether. She always had to wonder how Effy did it so effortlessly. If she were to lose her concentration even for a moment, she'd fuck up the song for all of them. And given that this song has unintentionally become quite important to her, she doesn't want to disappoint her friends. Disappoint the audience. Disappoint herself.

She's disrupted from her train of thought however by the sound of her phone blaring. She sets down the song sheet and searches wildly for the noise's source, but it's nowhere to be seen. After a few moments of digging though, she pulls her phone out from under the pile of papers laying beside her knee. "Hullo?" she answers hurriedly, not having bothered to check the caller ID.

"Uh, Naomi? Hi it's, um...Emily, here" mumbles the timid and familiar voice of her friend. Naomi's eyebrows shoot up – half from surprise and half from amusement.

"Hey Ems. What's up?" she asks evenly, disguising the slight hint of hurt in her voice as she abruptly remembers the redhead's dismissal of her earlier.

As if reading her mind, Emily's husky voice speaks quickly. "I said I'd talk to you later, remember?" Then a pause. "Or has the high blotted out your memory a bit?" she adds, laughing nervously. Naomi doesn't join in. Can tell that Emily's skirting around the bigger issue with humour. Knows the redhead assumes as much too when she quickly stops laughing and lets out a long sigh. "I just wanted to call and apologize for earlier. Katie...I didn't expect her to visit me. It came as a surprise. She called me yesterday and just, like, _announced_ that she was coming to see me. Then we agreed to meet-up in the college square and...you unfortunately got to her first" she explains in a rush, her tone apologetic.

Naomi shrugs, although Emily can't see it. "Don't worry about it Em. I've been called worse than a weirdo and a git, trust me" the blonde reassures her, a smile involuntarily tweaking at her cheeks.

The redhead sighs loudly again. "It's not okay. I didn't mean to snap at you, but...she can be a bit of a handful. Her arrival has left me a little stressed, to be perfectly honest" she murmurs, her voice growing quieter with each passing word.

The blonde scoffs. "You don't say?" she quips sarcastically, and feels her stomach flutter when her words elicit a tentative laugh from Emily. Maintains that she loves to hear Emily laugh.

"Yeah, I know..." the girl gingerly agrees. "I'm sorry she was so rude to you though. She's like that a lot. Don't take it personally". Naomi chuckles earnestly and bites her lip. Is about to reassure the redhead of her worries once more when Emily hastily speaks again. "I just hope you're not mad at me".

That catches the blonde off-guard. She stops laughing and scrunches her brow together. "Mad? Why would I be mad at you?" she asks, genuinely confused.

Emily hesitates, and Naomi can almost hear the cogs turning in her head through the phone. "Well...she's my sister, and...she was mean to you" she begins slowly. "I wouldn't blame you for being mad at me because of her behaviour. I mean, we _do_ look rather alike – sure, you mistook her for me. And it wouldn't be the first time she's gotten me into trouble" Emily clarifies.

Naomi has to repress a disbelieving laugh. _Fuck – can she be any more adorable? _she thinks fondly to herself. "Emily...she's your sister!" the blonde exclaims. "Why would I get mad at_ you_ for something your sister said? Yeah sure, you look alike...but you clearly don't _act_ alike. You're two different people".

There's a long pause on the other end of the line, and when a good thirty seconds pass by Naomi wonders if Emily has hung up on her. She's about to address as such when she hears a muffled sound. It sounds like Emily's – if she's still there – taking a big breath in.

"Listen...me and Katie are heading out for drinks later" mutters Emily's husky voice finally, and the blonde can't mistake the wavering emotion in her voice. "You're more than welcome to join us. You know, like...as a token-of-apology, sort of thing" she says, her voice strengthening up a bit. Naomi hesitates for a moment. Her immediate answer is no, but it's not for the reason that her friend will probably think.

"That sounds lovely but...I can't" she says tentatively, running a hand uneasily through her blonde locks.

"I get it. Enough of us for one day?" Emily concludes as predicted, although Naomi can detect a hint of disappointment in her voice. It tugs at her chest a little.

"No! No, it's not that...Although if anything, I think your sister would be less pleased to see me than if it were the other way round" the blonde reasons, and hears a light giggle erupt from down the line. Then she sighs harshly. "No it's just...I'm meeting up with someone else" she continues on hesitantly. There's another pause at Emily's end, and before Naomi can enquire as to why, the girl abruptly asks;

"With Effy?"

Her heart clenches a little in surprise. There's a clear bite to Emily's voice. Honestly, her friend could read her so well. Better than she first assumed, as a matter-of-fact. She's not sure whether to be worried or flattered by that little fact. "Yeah" she eventually admits, defeat in her tone. "With Effy". She waits for Emily's response. Wonders whether the redhead will be annoyed. It was immediately clear from their first meeting that Effy and Emily didn't like one another. Nowadays it's turned into apathy – neither passes much remark on the other anymore. Sometimes it makes Naomi feel like she's in the middle, but she tries to disregard their mutual indifference to one another. And even though Naomi's sure that Effy's coldness stems from feeling a little bit threatened by Emily – although she's been very careful about not mentioning Emily whilst around Effy – the blonde's at a loss as to why Emily might hold a grudge towards the brunette.

Emily proves this notion a few seconds later; sure enough, her voice chirrups down the receiver. "No problem. Some other time then" she says buoyantly, much to the blonde's astonishment. Another pause. "I better go, Naomes. Katie's just gotten out of the shower and we both need to get ready. Enjoy your night".

Naomi barely has time to mutter a hasty, "Goodbye", before the phone clicks. And for the second time that day, Naomi has been dismissed by Emily Fitch. It makes her feel slightly confused. Exasperated. But still, she hadn't been lying when she said she was meeting Effy. They were going out for drinks. Something they didn't do too often, admittedly, but whenever they did it was usually a pleasant experience. She really should be using tonight to finish her other tasks, but fuck it. A couple of drinks couldn't hurt, right? She probably could do with them after the day she's had.

So once again, Naomi attempts to rid herself of the red that's pricking at her periphery. Promises herself to have a good night. Next week was sure to be hell anyway. Might as well enjoy herself while she still has the chance, despite the heavy feeling that's suddenly started to press down on her chest. She remains baffled as to how Emily can make her feel this way. She's never felt anything like it with anyone, ever. Nothing comes close to it. But it doesn't matter though, because their friends. Just friends. So it's safe to mess around with Emily. Even safe to argue and banter with her, because neither of them can really get hurt in the process. It's that thought alone which makes her push the mess on her bed aside and stand up to get ready.

It's that thought alone which forces her to replace Emily's face in her mind with Effy's.

.


	10. The Gilded Goose

_I don't own Skins, but if I did then Naomily would have numerous appearances in the upcoming new series..._

_._

* * *

.

Effy pushes open the heavy wooden door and Naomi follows her in, her blue eyes immediately casting themselves around the room. After an initial onceover, she's left pleasantly surprised. Admittedly she was a bit sceptical when Effy first suggested this place, but now finds herself impressed with the brunette's choice.

Earlier on the two of them had been debating on where to go for drinks. Numerous options had been thrown about, with Naomi even suggesting Cook's uncle's pub down in Brockley for something different. They hadn't been there in a while. But Effy had vetoed that option at once – her argument being that they hadn't been to Keith's pub in a while for a reason. And well...Naomi couldn't really argue with her logic. The place _is_ kind of a dive.

So Effy came up with this new place; 'The Gilded Goose'. At first it sounded to the blonde like some sort of old man's pub, where the two of them would become easy meat to middle-aged, smelly drunkards. But according to the brunette it's fast becoming a place that's popular amongst old and young alike. So she gave in. And here they are now – standing in the doorway of a rustically decorated pub, with a decent crowd consisting of both adults and college students alike.

"Whoa" the blonde breathes out eventually, eyebrows raised in wonder. Effy casts a glance over her shoulder and smirks knowingly.

"Told you it was good" she says superciliously, turning her head to look forward again.

Naomi scoffs and rolls her eyes. Walks forward and takes one of Effy's hands, pulling her into the fray. "Come on Stonem. My round" she offers, before pulling them past a group of students toward the bar. "Two vodka and lemonades please" she calls to the barman once they reach the counter. He nods in answer and goes off to mix their orders. Naomi looks around to see Effy staring at her inquisitively. "What?" she asks impatiently. She always feels like the butt of some unknown joke with the brunette. It can be aggravating – but she'd never admit that it also makes up Effy's charm. Her mystery.

Effy smiles softly and shakes her head. Allows a rare soft smile to tweak at her cheeks, which in turn causes Naomi to loosen up. "Nothing. It's just funny to see how bossy you are with my drink orders" she explains, quirking a knowing eyebrow.

Naomi scoffs and smirks. "Well, if I let _you_ order, you'd just get whiskey. And then I'd have to carry you home before the night is out" she counters. Effy laughs quietly and runs a hand through her messy brown hair. Naomi ignores her lack of comeback and instead focuses on her actions. Becomes entranced by it. Sometimes she forgets how beautiful Effy really is.

After they receive their drinks they move over to the far corner of the room, where the pub further continues to show off it's contemporary links – they spot some empty bean bags and plonk themselves in one each. Naomi immediately becomes sucked into her seat. Escape becomes impossible. "Fucking hell! I forgot how these things could be death traps" she grumbles aloud, shuffling ineptly in the seat and sighing. She glances sideways. Effy of course has managed to gracefully seat herself; she's perched in such a way that she's not stuck in her bean bag, yet completely comfortable. Her expression is amused as she watches Naomi wriggle in her bag, clearly trying not to laugh at the blonde's misfortune. "Shut up. You wouldn't be laughing if you were stuck" she snaps, frowning.

Effy shrugs and sips her mixer, eyebrow firmly cocked. "That never happens" she says in that obscure way of hers once more, and Naomi knows what she's referring to. The girl rarely manages to embarrass herself or appear clumsy in any sort of way. And even if she does, she usually tends to cover it up or pass over it in such a way that makes her seem graceful and elegant. It annoys Naomi. Makes her feel self-conscious that Effy doesn't have to try nearly as hard as she or anyone else does in certain situations.

"Fuck off" she retorts petulantly. Puts down her drink beside her bean chair and crosses her arms for further effect. Effy lets out a breathy giggle. It sends a shiver up Naomi's spine. Okay, so she forgot how much she liked that sound. Effy's voice always was kind of captivating. Silvery. With all the Emily stuff that's been clogging up her mind recently, she finds it hard to remember certain little things.

Fuck. Emily. She'd forgotten about her too. Miraculously. But now their telephone conversation from earlier is back and fresh in her mind. It makes her chest tighten a little. _Forget about her... You're supposed to be having a good night and not thinking about her, remember? _she swiftly reminds herself. This thought in mind, her stance softens and she glances over to Effy. Sees the girl appraising her with her piercing blue eyes, before suddenly putting down her glass and getting up with just as much grace as when she sat down. The blonde wriggles more in her seat. "Oh, no. I don't need your help–"

That's about as far as her protest gets before Effy's lips are on hers. She can't even repress her surprise; a choky squeak erupts from her throat as the brunette glides a hand up to cup one of her cheeks. A few seconds later and she feels Effy's form lowering onto hers, and soon her lithe and slender body is leaning into Naomi's completely. That and she's slowly sinking lower into her bean bag under the weight. Not that she cares anymore.

Now firmly aware of what's happening though, Naomi tentatively places a hand on one of Effy's hips. Strokes her thumb along the exposed skin above the girl's waistband and revels in the slight moan it elicits from above her. Moves her other hand to the back of Effy's neck, just below her hairline, and grips at the soft hairs flowing from there. In response, Effy opens her mouth a bit more and deepens the kiss. Her lips move softly against Naomi's, and the blonde can't help but become lost to the world. The skin and hair underneath her fingertips is soft. Unbelievably soft. Effy moves her free hand to the hem of Naomi's shirt and trails it smoothly and gently up and underneath it. Her nails scratch along the blonde's torso and it causes Naomi to shudder with delight. "Fuck" she growls hoarsely against Effy's mouth, before pushing their lips firmly back together.

"Take her clothes off!"

The loud, belligerent voice causes them to break apart. Effy very slowly pulls away, and when Naomi's dazed blue eyes open again she sees the brunette shooting a disdainful glare over the blonde's left shoulder. Naomi shuffles upward slightly and follows Effy's line of sight. The group of students they'd passed by on their way in are now hovering not too far away. There's a large, stocky fellow – definitely of a rugby build – standing to the forefront. He's grinning most of all and has a lecherous glint in his eye. Clearly, he was the one who'd shouted. His friends are giggling behind him. Naomi groans loudly and rolls her eyes. Feels Effy starting to shuffle off of her, but grabs her wrist and holds her in place across her lap.

"Show's over guys!" the blonde calls out sharply to them, rising more in her seat and twisting around to address them. "Go find yourself someone else to perve over, since you all obviously have nothing better to do. And you, rugby boy–", She says sharply, pointing at the bigger guy, "–you and your crayola boner can fuck off now. Bye bye". The group of them stop laughing then and grudgingly begin to move off, but a few scoffs are audible as they cross over to the bar. Rugby boy follows them after a moment or so, but not before Naomi catches the fiery blush that's spread across his cheeks. She smiles smugly and turns her head back around. Effy's still sitting across her lap and is staring at her with something akin to amusement.

"Tasteful" she says snootily.

Naomi's smile widens and she shrugs. "Yeah well...thought we could do with a little privacy" she replies, her voice growing quiet. Effy quirks an eyebrow. Wiggles off of Naomi and lays next to her on the bean bag, their sides pressed flush against one another. Their eyes lock, blue on blue, and Effy begins to twirl a strand of Naomi's blonde hair between her fingers.

"Did you now?" she enquires, her voice husky. The wrong kind of husky. Naomi shakes this off. Shrugs and glances away.

"Maybe...although I suppose it _is _a little early for that kind of thing" she reasons. "That, and we're in the middle of a busy pub". She feels the weight of Effy's stare on her at that. Drags her own gaze upward and sees that there's a familiar glint in those empyreal blue eyes. A mischievous one.

"But Naomi" she begins in a deep yet deceptively innocent voice. Then she leans in to Naomi's ear. Her warm breath dances across Naomi's neck. It tickles. Causes the blonde to squirm in her seat. "This is only the start of it" she whispers, and another shiver rips through Naomi for an entirely different reason. She pulls back and meets Effy's eyes once more. Knows that her expression must be one of surprise and intrigue right now. The brunette, seemingly satisfied by her reaction, leans upward once again and stretches towards her own bean bag. The blonde observes as she grabs her drink and necks the rest of it down in one go. Observes as she pulls the glass away from her mouth, smacks her lips together and looks back at Naomi. "Next round's on me. Finish up your drink babe and I'll get you another one" she directs in a murmur, before sweeping herself into a standing position and gliding off towards the bar.

Naomi watches her go in a daze, before vaguely registering her instruction. She leans down and grabs her own glass and downs it like the brunette did. Licks the sticky, sweet residue from her lips and decides to have a look around in Effy's absence. She hadn't noticed at first, but there's loads of decorations on the walls. Mostly to do with music. LP covers of classic bands stuck all over the walls; pictures of music contemporaries, some of them signed; framed abstract paintings filled with colour. It's quite pretty. Eclectic. She's glad Effy picked this place. She's a feeling they'll be back. The place, the ambience. It's nice.

After a minute or two more of admiring, Naomi decides to use the loo while she's waiting for Effy to return with their drinks. She clumsily shifts and wiggles in her bean chair until she successfully gets to her feet, her legs feeling oddly unsteady now. Quickly crosses to the bathroom marked 'ladies' and pushes the door open. There's no one in there, so the blonde walks into one of the three free cubicles. She hears someone else come in around a minute or so later; their heels clack heavily against the tiled floor and it sounds like they've headed toward the sinks. She's done not too long afterward and swiftly exits to cubicle to wash her hands. Her eyes flit upward to the mirror before she reaches the counter and she stops in her tracks.

Katie Fitch's reflection is staring back at her.

Fuck.

It feels as if the breath has been sucked out of her lungs. Emily's twin is busy applying a thick coat of lipgloss and clearly hasn't seen her yet. But Naomi can't move. Can't speak. Her mind screams _Run! _so that she can avoid another ear-lashing, but her feet are rooted to the spot. Eventually her slow-thinking gets the better of her. Katie's brown eyes – the same brown doe eyes that Naomi admires about Emily – flicker upward and the blonde witnesses as a visible wave of comprehension hits her. The comprehension that soon turns to disbelief.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Katie bluntly asks, whirling around so that Naomi is now faced with the real thing and not just a reflection.

She hesitates. "I'm, uh...Well I'm um, erm..." she bumbles stupidly, literally lost for words.

Katie's disbelief changes to amusement; a smirk tugs up at her rouge lips. "Jesus. You're just as useless with your words now as you were earlier" she murmurs, giggling to herself. Then she turns back around and searches through her bag which is lying on the countertop. Continues applying her makeup, ignoring Naomi completely. The blonde still doesn't move. Nor reply. Can't fathom why she's so tongue-tied with Emily's sister, when she's only just met her today. And with the way things have gone between them already, it's clear they won't be buddy-buddies anytime soon. So why does she give a fuck, when she shouldn't? "Are you always this incompetent around people, or am I just special or something? Or is it that you've been toking up again or shooting up or fuck knows what else?" Katie wonders aloud, not even batting an eyelid.

That pricks at Naomi. Abruptly, she feels the life rush back into her once more. If there's anything she's good at, it's a bitchy comeback. "No drugs right now Katiekins. Although now I'm stuck with you I could probably do with some" she retorts, smiling smugly. The blonde watches as a flash bounces through Katie's brown eyes; she spins around and openly glares at Naomi, eyes narrowed.

"Watch your mouth, babes. That kind of talk might earn you a smack to the face. Wouldn't wanna mess up that pretty little mug of yours now, would we?"

Naomi's eyebrows raise. "Pretty, am I?" she asks, grinning even wider.

Katie growls and shakes her head. "Yeah, kind of. Except it looks like you've been getting style tips from a homeless person. Or even worse, Emily's mate JJ. Upgrade your fashion sense and then maybe we'll talk" she says frankly. Naomi scoffs loudly. Feels the tension dissipate altogether within a matter of moments. It seems they've reached a mutual understanding. Bitching. If they were to get along, bitching would be the way to do it. "Anyway, you didn't answer my question Naomi" the twin says suddenly, snapping Naomi from her musings. The blonde steps forward and abruptly remembers that she was about to wash her hands. "What are you doing here?" Katie asks while Naomi lathers her hands with soap.

The blonde finishes and shakes her hands to dry them a little. "I'm having drinks with my g...my friend" she says hastily, dabbing her hands dry on a nearby towel. "Besides, I could be asking you the same thing" she counters.

Katie doesn't falter. Just continues dabbing on a fresh coat of blush. "Me and Emsy are here having drinks too" she says. Naomi winces, but conceals it from the girl. Dammit, of course – Emily had invited her to come with them. But of all the places they could've picked, why _this_ pub? It's not even that well-known yet...couldn't they possibly have chosen somewhere else? Anywhere else? Still, there's nothing the blonde can do about that now. Perhaps if she were to grab Effy, they could sneak out before Emily notices–

"Right, I'm all done here. You coming, Naomi?" Katie says suddenly, grabbing her handbag and turning to face her. "Or are you just gonna start stuttering at me like a fool again?" she adds, eyebrow quirked.

Naomi snorts and bites her lip. "I think I'll manage this time" she mutters sarcastically, earning a small smile from the twin. Katie then walks towards the bathroom door, Naomi following close behind her. Once back in the main room, her blue eyes immediately begin to scan around wildly for any sign of Effy or Emily. At the same time her mind tries to formulate a plan to get her and Effy out unseen. Sure enough she spots Emily, and her stomach bubbles a little with excitement in spite of herself. Then she spots Effy. Well, that was easy. Except for the fact that they're right next to each other. _And_ talking to each other.

Double fuck.

Naomi watches helplessly as Katie also spots her twin and begins to move off towards her, heels clacking sharply against the wood beneath them. "Jesus Katie, were you applying a year's worth of Mac makeup in there?" the blonde hears Emily say as her sister approaches both her and Effy. "I nearly could've gone through two more drinks by this stage– Oh Naomi, hi!" she says, abruptly changing tack as her eyes wander past Katie's shoulder and land on a frozen Naomi. _Busted, _she thinks forlornly, hesitantly meeting the eyes of Katie's twin. Those brown doe eyes are alight with their trademark sparkle as the redhead surveys Naomi, her expression conveying authentic happiness at the blonde's presence. Then her eyes flicker past the redhead's form and meet Effy's cool blue ones. She's holding one of the drinks she'd obviously bought for both of them. Her face is as stoic as ever, although Naomi can see an almost indulged smirk curling at her lips.

"Well? Are you gonna just stand there like a muppet again, or come join us?" Katie's voice calls out to her, ripping through her mental dilemma. All three of them are staring at her, and it's under the weight of their gazes that Naomi shuffles forward to meet them.

"Hey uh, Emily" she mumbles quietly when she joins the circle. "Katie said you two were here. Small world, huh?" she says, her tone fringing on awkward. _So fucking small, _her brain can't help but chime in bitterly. Involuntarily her eyes flash upward to meet Effy's again; even through her impassive expression, Naomi can tell she's sharing similar thoughts. She hands Naomi one of their drinks, to which the blonde nods her thanks.

"Yeah. We were going to go to the SU bar, but Katie didn't want to go" Emily replies quietly, and Naomi finally looks at her properly. She's dolled herself up since earlier. Her red hair is tossed and glossy looking, tussled about to frame her small face; she's wearing tight skinny jeans which help to accentuate those short yet slim legs; her torso is dressed in a sleeved cream chiffon top that falls just below her waist; there's small, peep-toed heels on her feet to heighten her petite frame. To top it all off, she's applied a pale yet glowing coat of makeup which is further set-off by a darker, heavier eyeshadow. It all works to make her look older. More sophisticated, even. Not to mention fucking gorgeous.

"Does she always decide where you two go?" Effy suddenly says, and Naomi flinches. Is brought back to reality to see the brunette's gaze flashing between both twins, her expression probing and contemplative. Surprise colours Naomi's face and she takes a drink from her glass. It seems like an out of place question. Then again, things are rarely 'out of place' with Effy. Emily appears just as surprised by the brunette's interjection.

Her brow furrows together in thought. "Well...not all the time" she mumbles slowly, her words unsure. "Sometimes I pick...but Katie's visiting so I suppose–"

"I'm sorry, but who the fuck are you?" cuts in the redhead's sister, her words challenging. All of their stares flicker to Katie. Out of the corner of her eye Naomi sees a smirk pull up at Effy's lips. She smoothly, patiently takes a sip from her drink.

"I'm Effy Stonem. Naomi's girlfriend".

Um. What?

Her body seizes automatically. With a huge amount of effort, she barely manages to mask the look of utter horror – along with a touch of outrage – that threatens to break out over her face by taking another hasty gulp from her drink. But then her eyes unthinkingly seek out Emily. A look of surprise crosses the girl's face fleetingly, before her expression glazes over to become blank. And it hurts. Hurts Naomi a bit, even though she knows nothing can happen between them. Finds herself wanting the redhead to be jealous, despite just how incorrect Effy's little statement was.

"Oh, so you're lezzers then?" Katie replies, her face and tone of voice conveying far more astonishment than her sister. She glances between Naomi and Effy, but then a wry grin spreads across her face. "Actually it doesn't really surprise me, to be honest. I got a muff-munching vibe off you earlier Naomi. Maybe my gaydar isn't too bad after all–"

"Katie!" Emily exclaims, her expression disgusted. "That's rude" she scolds, her tone then dropping to a grumble.

Katie shrugs unapologetically. "Whatever. I just don't see the appeal, that's all". She looks down and begins to rummage absentmindedly through her bag. "I'd pick cock any day. It's what I've always said to Em. She hasn't had a boyfriend in fuck knows how long. It'll probably turn her into a horny bitch if she doesn't get any soon–"

"Fuck, will you just leave it?" Emily interjects, her voice on the verge of breaking. Naomi's attention is pricked by the weak sound. She glances at the redhead to see that she looks hugely embarrassed; her previously pale face has flushed to a deep red, and her eyes have turned wild with panic. It surprises the blonde. Again causes her to wonder why Emily lets her sister get away with such talk. Although she'd be lying if she said she wasn't glad that Emily hasn't had a boyfriend in a while. Not that that changes things, or anything.

"Actually, Katie" Naomi murmurs, mentally deciding to take the pressure off her friend. "I'm bi. So's Eff" she says unashamedly, taking another drink. She ignores the feeling of both Effy and Emily's stares on her. "It's much more fun. Means we get to, oh, how you say...have our pick of the crop?" she finishes, her accompanying smile wide and a little filthy. She hears a loud chuckle at that, and recognizes the musical sound. Looks to her side to see Emily giggling appreciatively, her eyes much brighter and amused now. It's clear that she's thankful for the distraction.

"Ugh, honestly" Katie snarls. Naomi looks back at her to see that she's pulled her phone out of her bag. "You shouldn't be hanging out with her Emily...she might give you ideas" Katie says, and Naomi is immediately irked by the open disapproval in her words. Can't help but gauge Emily's reaction by default; again the redhead stays mum. Her eyes cast downward and become unreadable. "Anyway, me and Emsy would love to stick around and chat," the twin says somewhat sarcastically, clearly reading the time off her phone, "but we're gonna head to the clubs. See what London's got on offer" she explains with a wink towards her sister. Emily smiles feebly and nods, but then meet's Naomi's eye hesitantly.

"You guys are welcome to come if you want" she murmurs, and Naomi can see by the hint of hope in her expression that the offer is genuine. But there's one small matter, and she can feel its source boring holes through her. Sure enough, she glances around to see Effy eyeballing her carefully. Curiously. Waiting for her next move. And the blonde can't help it. She lets out a sigh and caves.

"Another time, maybe" she says quietly, her words apologetic. "I'll leave you to have fun with your sister". Katie seems relieved by Naomi's rejection, but Emily's face looks strangely understanding. And there's that feeling of hurt again, pinching at Naomi's insides. _For f__uck's sake, get a grip. Effy would have your neck if you went, _she reminds herself hastily, forcing a smile. But then Effy decides to offer her two cents, and abruptly Naomi wishes she hadn't sided with her.

"Are you two coming to our gig next week?" the brunette asks monotonously as she swallows the last of her drink. There's the slightest bit of musicality to her words, which Naomi is quick to pick up on. She throws a glare towards Effy, not even bothering to conceal her resentment.

"What gig? I haven't heard about it" Emily's soft voice admits then, and Naomi looks back around to see that the redhead looks a little disappointed. _Fuck. Now I've offended her. Brilliant, _she thinks despairingly. But there's nothing she can do. The jig is up, and Effy knows it too. Might as well be the one to explain.

She sighs harshly. "We're playing in a place called 'The Blue-Room' next Wednesday. It's going to be a pretty big gig, so–"

"Ooh, 'The Blue-Room'? That's meant to be well lush!" Katie suddenly chirrups in, her eyes now much wider and eager.

Naomi ignores her. "Anyway...I think it's a ticket event, but it should be a pretty good night all the same". Naomi forces another smile at that, and feels her stomach flutter despite herself when she sees genuine enthusiasm appear in Emily's brown eyes.

The twins leave not long after that. It's only after they're gone a few minutes that Naomi turns on Effy. "Why were you talking to Emily? Why'd you tell them about the gig? And what the hell was that 'girlfriend' thing all about?" she demands in a rush, but is surprised by the threat in her tone. Effy doesn't bat an eyelid. Begins to fiddle with her fingernails, her expression bordering on amused.

"Emily's your friend. Any friend of yours is a friend of mine" she says coolly, although putting a little too much emphasis on the word 'friend'. "And as for the gig...you wouldn't want her to miss our performance, would you? Especially since you're going to be singing" the brunette replies, her voice still aloof.

Naomi blanches. Fuck. The song. She'd completely forgotten. A surge of heat courses up her body at the remembrance, only to settle in her cheeks. Emily's going to hear her sing. Hear her sing a song that's, indirectly, about her. Jesus. She's fucked. But perhaps...perhaps by some miracle, Emily might not even notice. She might just get away with it. Although, Emily's a smart girl...

Her body deflates then as she considers the alternative. She can't even attempt to hide the despair in her voice when she repeats her question.

"Why did you tell?"

Effy's pale blue eyes flicker up to meet hers. A flash of heat courses through them turning them momentarily dark, before hardening once more. "I thought it might be interesting" she says in a low voice. Another flash surges through her eyes, and Naomi quickly finds a name for the emotion. An emotion that is admittedly not often seen on Effy. Hurt. Effy's hurt and jealous...and once Naomi knows this little tidbit of knowledge, she abruptly realizes that she's just gotten the answer to her third question. Great. Now she's offended two people. Who's next – Cook? Freddie, maybe? One of her lecturers?

But then Effy takes her hand, her demeanour taking a one-eighty turn. "C'mon lezzer" she says in imitation of Katie. It results in a light chuckle from the both of them. "Let's get out of here. You've got a nine o' clock in the morning". They then leave, hand in hand, and Naomi is left with two reasons to be nervous on Wednesday.

.

* * *

.

_Hello friends. This chapter originally wasn't supposed to exist. I was actually going to skip right to the gig, but the thing about me is that I often just type what comes into my head. Hence this chapter. Hope the result was okay. I'd forgotten how much fun it is to write Katie. That KFF...always a pleasure, that girl. _

_As always, I'd appreciate your thoughts. You guys have been amazingly cool in your reviews and I'm really grateful for the encouragement. 'Till next time!_


	11. Monotone

_Skins isn't mine..._

_._

* * *

.

She can feel her fingers trembling slightly as she grips them hard around her glass, the condensation pooling against her skin. The club is filling up, fast, and she can't tell whether the erratic beating she's hearing is from the surround sound or her own heartbeat in her ears.

"Whoa, fuck, take it easy there Naomi. You still have to be able to play, you know". She thickly swallows her large mouthful of jack and coke at Freddie's incredulous voice. Coughs a little as it goes down the wrong way and fixes him with a watery stare.

"Sorry Freds" she mumbles hoarsely, rubbing her throat uneasily. "I'll be okay. Just a bit nervous, that's all".

Freddie's stance softens and he goes to stand beside her at the bar. Joins her in watching the ever-growing number of people that are arriving by the minute. "You always get nervous, babe...but then we end up doing great! There's no need to worry. This night will be no different from our other gigs. Just enjoy it" he says, cheerful smile firmly in place. She looks up at him. Makes sure to keep her expression blank, despite the scared thoughts screaming and kicking and punching their way around her brain.

Oh Freddie. Poor naive, optimistic little Freds. There is plenty of reason to worry. There is plenty of reason to be ten times more nervous tonight. Because tonight is going to be different from anything Naomi has ever experienced before – and it has absolutely nothing to do with the gig or her singing. Everything _but _that. She's never felt so torn in her life. This...this is why she's avoided getting too close to people. Avoided situations like this a lot of the time. It saves people from getting hurt. Saves herself from getting hurt. Except she really has no idea what's going to happen later on. Has a horrible feeling that somebody is going suffer tonight.

The only question is; who?

She swallows the last dregs of her drink and passes another glance around the crowded room, taking in her surroundings in order to gain a better grip on her reality. Katie hadn't been kidding when she'd said this place was "lush" – it really is. As clubs go, 'The Blue-Room' seems like a pretty classy place. Not Naomi's kind of thing ordinarily – she's more into the indie, grungy pub locations herself – but she can't help but admit it's nice. In fact, she wonders how Cook managed to get them into a place like this at all. Probably had to do some serious sweet-talking. There's three floors – plush velvet couches along the walls; a massive dancefloor on their current level; a large, roomy stage at the front of the floor; balcony overlooking the proceedings, where people can watch the performances. It's the stage she's most impressed by though. Normally the four of them have barely any room to move around. Naomi oftentimes is confined to moving one step to her left or right during their shows. But this one easily dwarfs any other stand they've played on before, and she knows it's only because a big stage would be needed in a fancy place like this. Plus, with several acts playing tonight, the spaciousness is essential. She's not complaining anyway. One less thing for her to worry about – no chance of 'Naomi Campbell: the Amazing Flying Guitarist' rearing her ugly head, if she were to tumble and soar into the crowd. _Good riddance, _she muses thankfully to herself.

It's a couple of minutes later when the first band start up. There's three acts tonight, and 'Silverflux' are up second. Freddie and Naomi watch from the safety of the bar, neither of them having moved. Freddie's now drinking a Heineken whilst Naomi sticks to her jack, finding its helping to ease the bubbling in her stomach a little.

"Naomi!"

Her stomach lurches at hearing her name being called in that familiarly melodic voice. _Fuck. Spoke to soon, _she thinks sombrely whilst turning her head. Sure enough she sees Emily's gorgeous figure approaching them, her petite body squeezing past groups of people. A moment later and the blonde sees that the redhead's being followed by Katie, JJ and a dark guy that Naomi's never seen before.

"Hey guys" the blonde manages to croak out when they stop before her, masking her anxiety with a small smile. A smile that's further helped along once she's clocked what Emily's wearing. She's wearing a plain tank-top, which is cinched in at the waist by a gorgeous, glittery high-waisted skirt. Unlike back at 'The Gilded Goose', there's sky high stilettos on her feet today; they almost make her as tall as Naomi. Her long red hair is wavy and lightly curled, leaving it to bounce adorably while she moves. And her makeup is similar to the way it was back at the pub. Sophisticated yet subtle. The whole package makes Naomi feel even more nervous, and abruptly she can hear that frenetic beating again.

"Fuck me, this place is well packed!" Katie suddenly exclaims, turning all attention onto her. She's dressed rather nicely, although much more over-the-top than her twin – which doesn't come as a surprise to Naomi. Although, the blonde has to stifle a smirk upon spotting the shiny pencil skirt she's wearing. She won't be doing any moshing in _that_ thing. "Your band better be good, Naomi. I had to pay a tenner into this place, and that was a discount!" the twin continues on exasperatedly, abruptly whirling around and glaring pointedly at the guy Naomi doesn't know. He pulls an innocent face, and the blonde raises an eyebrow questioningly. "Oh, hey Freddie" Katie purrs next, glancing past Naomi's shoulder and spotting her mate.

Freddie, who had been quietly observing the exchange, now turns and smiles in greeting. "Hello ladies. Glad you could make it" he says in a friendly manner. Then his eyes shoot past them. "And who are you guys?"

JJ cautiously steps around Katie and offers his hand. "Jonah Jeremiah Jones, or they call me JJ. They, um...right here" he bumbles meekly, gesturing feebly towards Emily and the other two. Naomi sees Katie roll her eyes and Emily smile fondly. "Nice to meet you...?"

"Freddie" her friend says simply in reply, and even over the music currently booming around them Naomi can hear the amusement in his voice.

The dark guy steps forward once JJ pulls away. "I am Thomas. So glad to meet you" he says politely as they shake hands, and immediately Naomi can tell he's not from around here. It's hard to find those kind of manners in this part of London. "And who might this lovely young lady be?" he says next, and Naomi realizes with surprise that he's talking about her. Normally she'd find his courtesy a bit ridiculous, but the nerves must be screwing her up a bit because she feels herself blush instead. She grabs his extended hand and answers with a quiet;

"Hi. I'm Naomi".

Things loosen up a little after that. The new arrivals all order drinks between them as the first act continues to play, all except for Thomas of course. Turns out he works behind the scenes here, hence why he can't be drinking on the job. It's also why Katie threw him a filthy earlier on a count of him not getting her a cheaper ticket. He actually turns out to be a very charming, interesting guy – he originally hailed from the Congo and happily regaled Naomi and Freddie the story of how he came to end up in Britain in search of work. Freddie seemed to get on well with JJ too, and Katie of course was fully enthralled with his company; batting her eyelashes and nodding enthusiastically to whatever Freddie had to say.

It's three-quarters of the way through the band's act when Naomi finally gets the chance to have an individual conversation with Emily. "How are you feeling?" the redhead asks caringly, leaning into her a bit as the others chat away behind them.

Naomi shrugs. Tries not to focus on Emily standing so close to her, on how warm the girl's skin is as their arms accidentally brush. "A bit nervous" she lies, her voice deceptively strong. "In case you can't tell, this is nothing like the last time you saw us play" she says evasively, gesturing widely around the room. "I don't want to mess things up".

Emily takes a tiny sip of her drink. Then she looks back at Naomi, her brown eyes warm. "You won't" Emily says, her voice growing softer if possible, and she lays her hand on Naomi's upper arm. The blonde's stomach lurches again, and she feels her forehead grow clammy despite already feeling hot from the club. Emily's hand on her skin feels so light, so comforting, yet it almost feels as if she's being scalded at the same time. She fights the urge to wrench her arm away. Fights against her feelings, because Emily can't grow suspicious of her motives. Can't grow suspicious in light of what's to happen later. Except the redhead seems to be a little taken aback by her own actions as well for some reason, because no sooner has she placed it there than it's gone. She hastily sips the drink in her hand again. "You'll be great" she continues afterward in a low murmur, her husky voice wavering a little. "I know you will".

The blonde swallows harshly, her throat dry. Suddenly wishes she had another drink. Emily's conviction in her is almost as unbearable as her being disappointed in her. It's driving Naomi insane. Here's Emily. Emily being a good friend, and now Naomi's going to muck everything up. She's going to ruin things for them, because if Emily cottons onto things tonight then their friendship will be all but over. That's a guarantee. And Naomi can't explain the inexplicable despair that makes her feel. The despair she would feel if she were to lose Emily.

"Hey" she hears an ethereally soft voice murmur from behind her then. Her eyelids wrench shut of their own accord. _Not now. Please, not now, _she silently prays, hoping against hope that the voice's owner will disappear if she begs hard enough. No such luck, of course – she hesitantly opens her eyes once more and looks around, only to see Effy's enigmatic form standing behind her. _Fuck. What the hell is she doing here? _she thinks disbelievingly. Effy always slinks onstage at the last moment, to ensure the maximum 'awe' and 'graceful' effect – why has she chosen to disregard that now?

Those sharp blue eyes pierce through Naomi, a knowing smile on the girl's pale face. "We're almost up. The others are finishing up soon". Her gaze flashes from Naomi to Emily. "Emily" she says in greeting, and Naomi definitely knows she's not imagining the curtness to Effy's tone.

The blonde unthinkingly glances at Emily, whose stance has stiffened slightly. "Hi Effy" she returns quickly. A smile flickers across her face for an instant, but it doesn't reach her eyes. Then her brow scrunches together in thought, almost as if she's contemplating something. "Good luck tonight" she offers, her voice lighter now. Naomi has to repress a fond smile. _Oh Emily. Too polite for your own good, _she thinks affectionately. Then she catches herself and looks back at Effy.

"Where's Cook?" she asks, suddenly remembering she hasn't seen her friend since they'd arrived here for rehearsal.

Effy rolls her eyes dramatically. "Chatting up some whore. You know how it is" she says, almost indifferently.

Naomi snorts. "Jesus, that boy can't keep his dick in his pants for one lousy sec–"

"Effy, hey" Katie's voice cuts in, and Naomi looks around to see that the other four are staring at them. "All set for the show?" the twin asks. Effy shrugs detachedly. Katie scoffs. "Well, you're lucky you get to play in such a cool place. That way if you're shit, it won't be that big of a deal–"

"Katie" Emily warns, although Naomi can tell it's more for her own benefit rather than Effy's. Naomi looks back at the brunette to see if she's offended by Katie's insinuation, but in contrast a deviant glint has appeared in her eye for some reason. Fuck. This can't be good.

"Oh, don't worry. Tonight's going to be very entertaining indeed. Right, Naomi?" she says innocently, and she even cocks her head to the side like an inquisitive puppy. Naomi freezes. Tries to suppress the sudden burst of anger that's begun to rush around her system. _Why the hell are you doing this to me? _she thinks crossly, and she has no doubt that her blue eyes, flashing with electricity, are conveying this uncomprehending thought. But as Effy meets her eyes again, she's surprised to find that they're stony. Completely unreadable. It throws her off.

"Yes" is all she manages to choke out, before hastily averting her gaze to the stage. The band have just finished.

"Well, I guess we better start getting ready" Freddie's cheerful voice says then, completely oblivious to the sudden air of tension that's appeared to his right. "Hope you guys enjoy the show" he says with a smile to the others, before disappearing beyond a group of people nearby. Naomi watches him depart for longer than necessary. Then her gaze flickers back to Effy.

"Guess that's us" the brunette says coolly. She fixes Naomi with a cocked eyebrow, before practically twirling around and stalking off. Naomi grudgingly watches her go and then apprehensively faces the others. They're all wearing looks of anticipation, albeit Emily's expression seems a little puzzled.

"See you" the blonde offers in a hushed voice, turning to follow Effy. She's barely walked two steps when she feels a warm hand slide into her own. Gasps at the heat and strength in it, before looking over her shoulder for its source. Emily is staring at her, an odd mixture of determination and enthusiasm etched into her soft features now. "Emily..." she breathes out of her own accord, her voice not entirely her own. She glances upward and sees that the others are unaware of their exchange. Looks back at the redhead and watches a reassuring smile flicker over her face.

"Good luck, Naomes" she says earnestly, with much more sureness in her tone than when she'd said it to Effy. "You'll be amazing" she adds quietly, squeezing Naomi's hand firmly.

Naomi can't even reply. Can only nod dumbly and squeeze back whilst looking deep into Emily's sparkling brown eyes. "Thanks" she croaks eventually, before gently – and regretfully – pulling her hand out of Emily's and following in Effy's wake at last. She circles around the bustling, vibrating crowd toward the stage and sees upon her approach that all three of her other bandmates are up there already. "Where the fuck have you been?" she spits at Cook once she hops up, a little too harshly on a count of what just happened to her. She's still in a state of shock.

Cook seems to find her quip no different from the way she normally speaks to him; he continues checking his equipment, making sure everything's in order. "Somewhere you know all too well Naomikins – fannyland" he says frankly, chortling. Naomi screws up her face in disgust. "Met some bird downstairs. Gaggin' for it, she was. Was fingering her barely twenty minutes after I first started talking to her–"

"Ew, jesus! No, Cook. You're disgusting. I don't need to know of your sexcapades" Naomi admonishes him, horrified. Her eyes drift to his neck, and sure enough she spots a big, greasy lipstick kiss smudged along the side of his neck. A badly concealed smile tweaks at her cheeks. Cook always did manage to amuse her in even the most dire of situations.

He merely shrugs. "You were the one who asked, Blondie. Anyway, how are ya? Got any news for Cookie?"

Unconciously, she finds her gaze flashing to Effy. The brunette is delicately pressing her keys, testing the sound. But almost as if she senses Naomi's stare, she looks over her shoulder a few moments later. A wry grin twitches at her thin lips, before she looks back down again. Red inadvertently flashes across Naomi's mind, and she bites down hard on the inside of her cheek. The metallic taste of blood appears in her mouth at once.

"Nope. None whatsoever" she replies curtly.

.

It's coming. She knows it is. They've practiced their routine what must be a million times over the past several weeks, and she knows that the thing she's been dreading is finally catching up with her.

They're halfway through their act, and Effy is rasping out the words to this current up-tempo number. Her whispery vocals drift resoundingly around the audience, causing every eye in the room to be firmly glued to her.

And indeed, the crowd is enthralled. Most people are bobbing their heads enthusiastically right now. Others are jumping up and down to the beat, throwing their hands up in the air. Some are merely gazing up at them appreciatively, listening and taking in the music with thoughtful expressions and wide eyes. Except every now and again Naomi's stare will inadvertently come to fall upon some familiar faces, and she can't help but analyze over what they're doing. What they're thinking. For one thing, they seem to be enjoying the performance. They're not jumping up and down like the people around them, but JJ and even Katie – who's unsurprisingly rather confined due to her tight skirt – are looking up at them with enrapt looks on their faces from the far left of the stage, four or five rows from the top. Thomas is nowhere to be seen. Presumably he's off attending to some club-related affairs. And Emily, oh sweet sweet Emily. Every time Naomi's wild blue eyes meet those shining brown ones, she practically has to look away again in fear. They're just so _powerful. _Warm. Inviting. How she even managed to land a friend who was so beautiful, so caring, was anybody's guess.

Wonder how much longer that will last?

"Oy oy folks! We all enjoying ourselves?" Cook bellows into his mic a few minutes later during a pause in their set. The crowd cheers and whoops in reply, and Naomi smiles in spite of herself when she sees Emily and the other two scream loudly in response. "Brilliant, that's what Cookie likes to hear!" he replies heartily, satisfied. Then he clears his throat. "Okay, listen up though, yeah? Today's your lucky day lads and ladettes, 'cause we're gonna try something different righ' now". A murmur of curiosity sweeps over the crowd, and Naomi glimpses Emily's brow furrow in confusion. Her gaze then flickers to Effy. The brunette is standing in a rigid sort of way. It's usually unlike her to look so tense – she normally displays such an aloofness to her. "We're gonna play a new song for ya now, and our very own guitarist Naomi–", he gestures exaggeratedly towards her and the blonde waves stupidly in response, "–is doing backup vocal for the first time. So be nice, yeah? Or I'll fuckin' gun ya later". There's a collective chuckle that erupts from the crowd, followed by a round of applause as all four of them get themselves ready to start up again. A stagehand hops up and tweaks at the mic that was placed in front of her earlier, before giving her the thumbs up and dashing off again.

Her muscles and limbs all tense up at once just as the beginnings of Freddie's bass notes sound out. _Don't look at her. Don't look at her, _her mind commands repeatedly, knowing that if she were to gauge Emily's reaction it could throw her off. But of course she's never herself when it comes to Emily, so barely a moment later does she glance up for a fraction of a second. It's not long, but it's enough to take in the throughly astonished and excited look on the redhead's porcelain face.

But her attention is firmly snapped back to the present when she hears Cook begin to beat on his drums, which is also her and Effy's cue to start playing. She plays her first few chords, at the same time her gaze flickering over to the brunette. Effy's nimble and white fingers begin to press down gently on her keys and the eerie synth noises quickly reach everyone's ears. It has an immediate mellowing effect; Naomi can visibly see the crowd relax and deflate after their jumpier tune beforehand.

_It's been too quiet_

_For too long_

_Now you're here_

_It's not as silent anymore_

It's quick. So quick that normally she wouldn't catch it, but Naomi manages to pick up on a bitter edge to the first couple of words. But then Effy's usual ethereal, majestic voice rings clear throughout the room, leaving everyone who hears her powerless to tear their eyes or ears away. She purrs gently at first, delicately, until her voice gradually begins to grow louder. Naomi's voice softly sings out after the first verse, adding a lightness to the words that Effy's tone lacks.

_The world is dark, cold, lonely_

_You make it bright_

They continue through the song at their soft, melancholy pace, but eventually it hits her with striking clarity how odd this is. Odd that Effy's the one singing. Maybe she hadn't noticed it as much beforehand when they were playing in Cook's dingy little garage...but with the bright spotlights beaming down on them, awed faces staring up at them and the brunette's otherworldly tones echoing off the walls, she suddenly finds everything surreal. Effy singing her lyrics – _her_ feelings, _her_ thoughts, _her_ perceptions – on a line as blurry as this, is hugely surreal. And yet...the girl's mythical voice manages to wrap itself around Naomi's words and give them a strength the blonde didn't think was possible. And all she can do in the meantime is try to match along with her own softer, lighter voice, and hope it's enough.

_Monotone, no more_

_Show me colour, show me light_

The erratic beating returns as they near the end. Is stronger than before. Is spurred on by the mixture of emotions rapidly surging through her veins. Excitement; a quick once-over of the faces below show that people are genuinely wrapped up in the song. Fear; she refuses to let her eyes drift to a certain point in the crowd. Dread; even as her voice descends to a hushed murmur and Effy's a raspy whisper, she can't help but worry over what will happen next. With the crowd. With her friends. Mostly though, with Emily.

_Stay, stay with me_

_This is too good to give up now_

_Keep me from the grey_

_Show me the way._

Her last chords rings out and hers and Effy's voices lower like that of a volume button being turned down. Then there's a pause. A pause that feels agonizingly long to Naomi – so much so that she suddenly realizes how much her hands are shaking now that she's finished playing.

But then, like the abrupt crack of a whip, there's an eruption of tumultuous applause and cheering. Naomi's shocked. It's one of the loudest they've received all night, and she feels like her body's not her own all of a sudden. They like it. They like her song. The one she thought was rubbish. The one she, deep down, didn't want anybody to hear, least of all Emily. But they like it. _Love _it, since their enthusiastic response seems to be carrying on way longer than necessary. And after this notion eventually burrows its way past her thick peroxide set of locks, she can't help but let an awkward grin stretch over her face.

She likes being proven wrong.

"Phwoar! I was wrong before – _that's _what I like to hear!" shouts Cook's voice out of the blue, and she whirls around on the spot to see her friend speaking into the mic hovering above his drumkit. Even from here she can see the crooked beam on his face. "Told ya you were in for a treat. Merry Christmas, eh? Yous heard it here first folks, that one there was 'Monotone'" her friend continues to say cheerfully, and she can tell he's just as surprised by the crowd's reaction as she is. "Righ' then, enough small talk though. Let's keep the momentum going, shall we?"

Some people whoop in agreement, and Cook pulls his mouth away from the mic. She catches his eye briefly and he gives her a proud, unabashed wink. It makes her blush. Then her eyes flicker around to Freddie and Effy. Freddie gives her a discreet thumbs up and a reassuring smile. Effy however isn't even looking at her. Is staring off into space instead. The tension in her frame has dissolved slightly, but there's definitely still something off about her demeanour. Naomi ignores her. Fiddles with her guitar for a couple of moments instead as they all get ready to start into the next song. She's glad she isn't singing for this one. Feels entirely too shaky to continue with this singing lark. Has to admire Effy for doing it so flawlessly most of the time.

After another minute or so, Effy eventually cues everyone in with her synth. Naomi relaxes. Feels the weight lifting off her shoulders now that she's playing something familiar and is done with the thing that's been causing her such grief. Plucks away leisurely, enjoying the crowd's renewed enthusiasm. But her idleness gets the better of her, because without thinking she allows her gaze to drift too far to the left. JJ's shuffling away on the spot, and she can't help but think that he looks a little cute doing it from where she's standing. Katie's standing still like before, except her trademark smirk has now turned into a genuine wide smile. Naomi feels happy at the sight of it. Feels happy that Katie's enjoying herself.

Except then her gaze shifts another bit, and she has to keep herself from fucking up a chord. Feels her stomach fall, probably along with her face. Out of all the things Naomi expected to see on Emily's face, this was not even close. Enjoyment. Dislike. Indifference. Any one of these were what the blonde was mainly expecting. But she can't even begin to name the emotions rapidly flashing across the redhead's face when they eventually lock eyes, blue and brown.

Emily looks...conflicted. Pained, almost. Like she's currently suffering from a huge mental battle. But mostly, she just looks angry. Angry? Why on earth should she be angry? But despite all the emotions burning in those big brown eyes, Naomi can't explain the reasons for them. So instead, she assumes the worst.

_She hated it. She hates me._

_._

* * *

.

_Hmm...so that was 'The Blue-Room'..._

_Yes I didn't include the whole 'song', in fear of me writing an epic fail/cringy thing so I hope what came out sufficed enough. The second part to this will probably be up quick enough. I know what I'm going to write but I didn't want to make this chapter too big. Leave 'em wanting more, eh? (I hope!)_

_And guys...I think I'm a little bit in love with the new cast. Some of them are so adorable after watching their interviews, and I'm properly looking forward to Series 5 now for the first time. But of course, Gen2 will always be number one in my Skins heart. _

_Anywho, leave a review if ya want. They make me happy. x_


	12. Broken Rules

.

"Hey Naomi, how's it going– whoa! Where are you off to in such a hurry?"

Damn. No other option now – Naomi has no choice but to stop and acknowledge Freddie, whose body she practically crashed into her eagerness to pass by. Not the best place to stop though. They're both standing at the edge of the crowd now, Thomas and JJ also at Freddie's side, and people are shoving and pushing at her back while they all hop around in their enthusiasm to the band currently playing. Her friend's enquiring and slightly concerned brown eyes are staring down at her, and unwillingly she lifts her frantic gaze up to meet his.

"Nowhere" she lies, her tone clipped. "I'm not hurrying anywhere".

Freddie raises an eyebrow, but an amused grin stretches over his face nonetheless. "Could have fooled me. You nearly knocked me down babe" he replies, chuckling lightly. She sees Thomas and JJ share a smile as well, but Naomi doesn't join in. Can only offer a weak grimace in reply so as not to be completely rude. Her courtesy and patience went out the window ages ago though, and she really wishes Freddie would let her continue her search in peace. Well...maybe not in _peace _exactly – her muddled brain is seeing to that – but at least let her go.

But her defences crumble the longer she remains under his caring gaze, and she lets out a long sigh in defeat. "Sorry. I'm just a bit jumpy" she says quietly, her voice surprisingly honest. She feels her chest tighten a little.

JJ clears his throat. "I can't say I blame you, Naomi. I'm not very well-equipped to deal with crowds either, especially since I suffer from severe social anxiety sometimes and this large amount of people would normally have me 'locking-on'. But I must actually be enjoying myself tonight because I always get a higher release of endorphins when I'm enjoying myself and that tends to keep the anxiety at bay–"

"JJ, it's not that" she eventually cuts in, somewhat impatiently. JJ stops speaking at once, a quick blush spreading across his cheeks. If it were at any other time she would have backtracked and apologized for her shortness, but right now she's not in the state of mind to do so. Thomas must feel so too; he leans towards her then, his voice raised due to the loud music pounding around them.

"Will you be alright? Would you like me to get you some water?" he asks courteously, concern and something the blonde can't place in his expression.

She smiles in spite of herself. "No, I'll be fine" she says, turning back towards Freddie. "It's nothing, really. Just...if you see Em...um, if you see the twins or anything, let me know. Okay?" she says to her friend, making to move away at last. Her precious time is dwindling by the minute.

Freddie nods, his warm brown eyes narrowing a little. "Yeah sure. No problem" he answers in confusion, giving her shoulder a light pat. She nods in thanks and is finally allowed to leave. Leaves the three of them behind so they can actually enjoy their night, unlike her, as she resumes her futile search for the elusive Emily Fitch.

She can't help but mull over how déjà vu this whole scenario is. The redhead disappeared after her last gig too, but at least the blonde managed to catch her last minute back then. The effort had turned out to be in vain however – Emily couldn't have gotten out faster if she'd tried. But Naomi can only hope that the girl hasn't done the same thing tonight. Can only hope she finds her, because those emotions she witnessed...she needs to know the cause. Needs to know why Emily might be angry with her, because she can't for the life of her figure out why the redhead would be mad. Surprised, maybe. Confused, but not _mad. _

So the blonde carries on pushing and pressing past people hopelessly, not taking in any faces or voices. Only looking for that one glimpse of red which will point her in the right direction. Her heart beats harder and her stomach bubbles at the thought of it.

But then she feels a hard yank on her arm and is whirled around only to come face to face with Effy Stonem. Can't even begin to stifle her surprise and incredulity before she feels the brunette's lips pressing firmly, roughly against hers. When her mind catches up with her body however, she grabs the girl by the shoulders and forcefully pushes her away. "Eff, what the fuck?" she spits out unceremoniously, glaring at her through narrowed eyelids. Except Effy doesn't seem offended by her resistance. In contrast, she has a genuine, wide smile on her pale face and a distant look in her normally piercing blue eyes.

"Naomi, babe" she whispers in that silvery voice of hers, taking a step closer once more. Then, to the blonde's surprise, those blue eyes look her up and down, taking an extra amount of time to linger on her tits. Despite her current agitation, Naomi can't help but flush under that sudden lusty gaze. "You look fucking hot" the brunette says unabashedly then, leaning into her ear and grazing her teeth along the lobe. It causes Naomi to shudder, despite the mixture of emotions running rampant inside of her. The feeling of an icy hand slipping underneath her top though, coming to rest on the heated skin of her abdomen, snaps her back to the present.

"What do you want Effy?" the blonde says, her tone bemused now rather than irritated. Effy pulls back and cocks her head to one side. Surveys Naomi's face for a long time, not one word being spoken. But the blonde's frustration swells again when the girl tucks her lip between her teeth. "Eff, stop fucking about, alright? I said, what do you–"

Thud. Next thing she knows, her back's to the nearest wall and Effy's form is pressed flush against hers. Her eyelid cracks open a fraction in order to grasp what's happening, and she sees that the brunette has steered them towards a darker area of the club. There's still people around, but Naomi's vision and mind is so blurry right now that she can't tell up from down. Can only submerge herself in the sensation of Effy's chapped lips roughly claiming her own; she feels a tongue push past her lips, and the fire between them both increases rapidly. Effy's cold hands are everywhere, and Naomi feels powerless. Feels like a useless mass of pent up energy as Effy's frantic – and almost desperate – touches sear across her skin.

"I want to fuck. I want to fuck you" she growls against Naomi's lips then, and even adds a menacing giggle to the end. But her dirty talk seems to be the wrong thing to say altogether, because it's then that Naomi's common sense kicks in. A burning flash of red kicks her motions into gear, and she shoves Effy hard. Nearly causes Effy to land on her arse on the dirty, sticky floor, but the girl manages to keep her footing just in time. Once there's space between them, the blonde realizes that she's panting profusely. Feels her limbs shaking, like she's exhausted. Her gaze flickers back to Effy, whose eyes are wide and whose head is tilted like that of an inquisitive puppy again. It causes Naomi's incredulity to flare up once more.

"What the hell are you playing at?" she croaks out, eyebrows furrowed. "We're in the middle of a club, Eff". Effy giggles in that weird way again, and Naomi's brow furrows even more. Except then she suddenly notices that those pale blue eyes are very dilated and faraway. Everything clicks into place.

"You never used to mind, remember?" Effy says, her voice hoarse. "It's not the first time I've fucked you up against a bathroom stall, Naomi" she says, her tone practically a growl now.

Naomi feels her top lip curling up in agitation. Feels annoyed by Effy's games, or whatever this ploy of hers is. The brunette could barely even meet her eye earlier, and now she wants to shag? _Whatever, _the blonde thinks to herself, exasperated. This thought in mind, she shakes her head and sighs harshly. Fixes Effy with a hard stare. "I dunno what you've taken, but I don't have time for this" she says shortly, and goes to stalk past Effy. Finds her path blocked when the brunette steps in front of her once more and runs a hand lasciviously up her arm.

"C'mon babe, don't be like that" she purrs, flitting her fingers downward and brushing them against Naomi's hand. "I'm just trying to have some fun. You can have some stuff too, if you'd like" she murmurs into Naomi's ear, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively. Then she gestures towards her pocket, and Naomi has to repress an eyeroll. Doesn't feel up to taking anything tonight. She really just wants to find Emily, and her opportunity to do so is being shortened the longer she stays here with Effy.

Their eyes meet again, blue and blue, and Naomi shakes her head. "Not tonight Eff. Just leave it, yeah?" she pleads, pulling her hand away from Effy's. But again Effy stops her in her tracks, only now the playfulness in her stance has all but disappeared. In its place is a look Naomi's never seen before. She can't quite put a name to it, but it's enough to keep any words from leaving her throat.

"Why her?" Effy whispers then, her tone hushed and cracked. Her dilated pupils flash with some indecipherable emotion, and Naomi can only stare into them dumbly. When the girl gets no response however, Naomi watches her face screw up a little. "Why not me?" she asks obscurely, and Naomi's all but lost. Doesn't know what to take from Effy's words, because she's already been confused enough by the brunette all throughout tonight.

But she knows she can't brush off Effy's comment, so answers in a more sympathetic tone. "I'm sorry, okay?" she says. "I'll see you later". Then, not sure of what else to do, she plants a soft kiss to Effy's temple and turns away before she's stopped again, her feet being the only things carrying her forward.

Her brain's gone into overdrive. Emily. Effy. Emily. Effy. Stupid Emily. Stupid Effy. Why do things always have to be so complicated? All she wants is for things to be easy, but her life has never been like that. No matter how much she drives for simplicity, she's never going to get it. So she has no choice but to persevere in her search for her friend, despite knowing that what she might hear might be a bit tough to take in.

As she continues pushing past the copious amounts of club-goers however, her sight eventually lands on Cook. She desperately heads in his direction, only to see that he's in the middle of chatting up some girl. Chatting and mildly groping. "'Sup Blondie!" he says in greeting as she approaches, wide and filthy grin in place. "Have you met Candice? She's the girl I was telling ya about earlier–"

"I need you to distract Effy" Naomi blurts out, completely disregarding the caked-up brunette he's trying to introduce her to. "Please".

Cook fixes her with a confused look, his eyes flickering pointedly between her and Candice. "Naomio, I'm kind of in the middle of something 'ere" he says, practically chuckling. It's then that she notices the lipstick kiss still smudged along his throat, except there's also a new one on his cheek. "Can't ya get somebody else to distract your girlfriend?" he continues.

Naomi ignores his words. Needs Cook to understand, to help her out. She can't stay with Effy. But with the state the girl's currently in, she's afraid to leave her alone either. "Please, Cook" she tries again, her tone and stance growing weary now. "Find her and distract her for a little while, okay? There's something I need to do". He eyeballs her questioningly for a couple more moments. Candice is looking huffily between them, clearly not impressed by Naomi's interjection. The blonde represses the urge to snarl at her.

Eventually Cook lets out a defeated sigh. "Bloody hell...fine!" he concedes. "I'll keep her busy for a while, yeah? You've got half an hour, but then I'm gone" he says sternly. Naomi nods enthusiastically, enveloping him in a quick hug just as Candice crosses her arms petulantly.

"Thank you, I owe you one" she says hastily, trying not to throw Candice a filthy before darting past him.

"You're damn righ' ya do!" she hears him call from behind her, and she can't help but laugh. It's only when she's walking away though that she realizes that the other band's still playing. She quickly glances towards the stage, and sees the crowd dancing and cheering and thoroughly enjoying themselves still. This act have been playing for a good forty minutes now. 'Silverflux's' set only lasted just under an hour, and Naomi was off and looking for Emily almost as soon as they'd finished. Unfortunately the redhead had disappeared not long after they'd played 'Monotone'. Naomi can remember the distinctly helpless feeling she'd experienced whilst watching the redhead pushing her way back through crowd, knowing that she couldn't do a single thing to stop her.

But she knows this band have not long until they're finished, and then the club is supposed to pack it in. That means she has to find Emily, and soon. She doesn't particularly want to wait until tomorrow to have her questions answered. But with all the confusion and impatience and desperation currently surging through her system, she abruptly realizes that she's dying for a fag. Bickers with her mind on whether to give in and have one, knowing she'll probably have very little time left if she does. _Fuck it. One ciggie can't hurt, _she reasons, hurriedly steering herself towards an exit.

She's currently on the second floor, so has to make her way downstairs to find a path outside. The nearest exit she finds leads to a dark and dingy alley, but she figures it'll do. She's not going to be spending a long time out there anyway, so she pushes open the heavy steel door leading to the alleyway and steps into the cold, wintry air. "Jesus" she groans quietly to herself, running her hands briskly up and down her arms. She curses herself for not having brought a jacket, but nevertheless shoves her hand into her pocket and pulls out her cigarette packet and a lighter. Sticks the fag in her mouth and fumbles with the lighter for a few seconds, although she's met unsuccessfully. "Fuck fuckity fuck" she curses in an angry murmur, her fingers desperately fiddling with the valve in hope of some sort of ignition.

"Need a light?"

Her hands freeze their actions, along with her entire body. She tries to register if she's hearing things, or if she really did just hear that familiar husky voice speak to her. Glances up from her slightly blue fingers to the opposite side of the alley.

It's Emily alright. The redhead is leaning against the wall across from her, ankles crossed and a sparked-up cigarette hanging from her pouted lips. She's openly staring at Naomi, and even from this angle Naomi can see the darkness in her normally bright brown eyes. But the blonde's initial surprise turns into lust the longer she eyes the redhead standing there. She looks damn sexy right now; all sultry and sophisticated looking as smoke drifts up from her lips. But then the lust is overcome by confusion and panic.

Her feet move forward of their own accord. For all the searching she's been doing, she finds she's utterly unprepared now that she's actually found Emily. Has no clue what to say to her. "Uh...you don't smoke" she says stupidly instead, coming to stop a few inches in front of Emily. The redhead doesn't even bat an eyelid. Merely exhales another puff of smoke before shrugging.

"I know. I'm making an exception for tonight" she says monotonously, and Naomi can't help but notice how dead her voice sounds. Her hand reaches into the bag hanging off her shoulder. "Need a light?" she repeats, taking one out from her bag.

Naomi gawks at her. Doesn't say anything else. Just takes the lighter and lights up her cigarette at last. "Thanks" she says quietly, then falls silent and drags on her cigarette. The rush of nicotine through her system feels like home, and abruptly she has a better grasp on where she is. Realizes why she came to find Emily in the first place. "Why are you out here?" she asks quietly, surprised by how vulnerable her voice sounds.

Emily glances away. Trains her eyes on a flickering lamplight hanging overhead and then takes another long drag of her cigarette. "I just needed some air" she eventually replies, coughing a little on her exhalation.

Naomi can't help it. She grins. "Lot good that'll do you" she says, gesturing towards the cigarette clutched in the girl's fingers. Her attempt at lightening the situation backfires entirely. Emily's eyes narrow to a glare and she steers it towards Naomi. It causes the breath to be sucked from the blonde's lungs. Emily's eyes can be very powerful when she wants them to be.

"What do you want Naomi?" she asks curtly, stubbing out her fag on the wall behind her and crossing her arms. Naomi hesitates. Fills in her time by dragging on her own cigarette, rapidly trying to come up with a plausible reply. _I want to know why you're out here, and not with me. I want to know why you're angry with me. I want to know why my heart's beating so fast right now, _her mind rattles off hastily, although none of it reaches her cowardly lips of course.

"I wanted to see you" she says softly instead, her tone growing even more vulnerable if possible. She might be imagining it, but she's pretty sure Emily flinches then. Except her stony demeanour quickly falls back into place a second later. "You, um...took off rather quick during our act. That's all" she lies, raising her fag to her lips once more in an attempt to mask the ache she feels.

Emily fixes her with a raised eyebrow. Then bites on her pink bottom lip. "I'm just thinking, okay?" she says, her tone much gentler now.

Naomi can feel her heart stalling a bit. Curiosity gets the better of her. "About what?" she pushes in a whisper.

Emily stares at her for a long time. Naomi doesn't move. The cigarette remains idly clutched in her fingers, the skin rapidly being eaten up by ash while she waits. But eventually Emily lets out a long sigh, and the blonde observes as a torn look flashes across her beautiful face. "I'm thinking about a lot of things, Naomes. A lot of confusing, fucked up things. And I don't know what to do about them" she says, her voice husky yet honest. The blonde feels her brow furrow in confusion. But Emily's not done. "Tell me something" she says, leaning back off the wall and standing directly in front of Naomi. The blonde searches her eyes, silently imploring her to continue. Emily chews on her lip again, cocking her head to one side. "Was it Effy's?"

Naomi stalls. Drops her charred cigarette and raises her eyebrows. "I beg your pardon?" she asks uncomprehendingly.

Emily's expression doesn't waver. "'Monotone'. Was it Effy who wrote it?" she explains, her voice becoming lifeless once more.

_Oh. That,_ she realizes, trying not to add a mental 'duh' to the end. But the redhead's question takes her aback nonetheless. She expected to be out here talking about Emily, and now the spotlight's been turned onto her. And if Emily's unfaltering stance is anything to go by, neither of them are leaving here before she gives an answer. "Um...no. She didn't". The blonde watches Emily's eyes flash, and automatically predicts the follow-up question. "I...I did" she mumbles, the words barely audible.

Emily's eyelids slip closed and she takes a deep breath in. Naomi watches, fascinated, while at the same time her heart continues to race at a million miles an hour. Something tells her that they're about to steer into dangerous territory. It's what she's been dreading for weeks.

But then the redhead's dark brown eyes reappear from weary lids, and Naomi almost has to gasp at how emotional they are. She can see Emily's walls flickering through them. "Who?" she asks, her husky voice brittle.

"Who what?" the blonde responds, brow furrowing.

"Who was it for?" she asks, and a hint of hysteria creeps into her tone at the end. Naomi winces. Feels her throat grow dry and her palms grow sweaty. Suddenly wishes she had her cigarette back, because Emily almost looks...pleading right now.

"It...it wasn't _for _anyone" she says in a hushed tone. It's not a total lie – the song is _about_ someone, and technically that someone was never supposed to hear it in the first place. But Emily isn't having any of her excuses; the redhead lets out a growl – one that could match one of Katie's – and whirls around, her back now facing Naomi.

"You're so bloody annoying!" the redhead exclaims then, and Naomi winces again. Feels her resolve growing weaker by the minute as they both stand there in this dark, dirty alley in the cold cold night. All she wants in that moment is to embrace Emily. To protect her from the cold, from whatever is causing her anger. No. What she really wants is to rewind time so that she never wrote that stupid fucking song in the first place, so that they still might be able to leave here as friends.

"I'm sorry" is all she can say, although she's not really sure what she's apologizing for. Her effort has the opposite desired effect – Emily whirls around again, her face screwed up in frustration. It pierces Naomi's chest. Makes her feel tiny and awful.

"You should be fucking sorry" Emily growls, and her voice is on the verge of breaking. Naomi can only stand there hopelessly. It's clear. Emily's figured it out. She's figured out that Naomi likes her, and now wants absolutely nothing to do with her. Who can blame her, really? She never was a very good friend in the first place. Emily deserves better. Emily doesn't deserve a selfish person like her, who can never make her mind up when needed.

Nevertheless, the blonde can only watch helplessly while Emily begins to pace frantically before her. The girl stumbles in her heels, but bats Naomi's hand away when she attempts to help her. "No, don't touch me" she growls again, and Naomi immediately obliges and withdraws her hand. Feels her heart clench at the pained look on Emily's face. "You can't touch me, alright? You can't touch me. Not after everything I've done. Not after everything I've put myself through to be a good friend to you" she babbles, her voice broken and rushed.

Naomi bites down hard on her lip. Feels tears beginning to pool in her eyes, as she realizes just how much she's fucked things up between them. "I didn't want this to happen...it just did. I'm sorry" she apologizes again, her words weak and hopeless. Emily continues to pace, her expression completely overwrought with confusion and despair. Naomi doesn't know what to do. Emily's normally so calm, so cool, so laid-back. She's never seen her like this. Can't understand how she's _this_ upset.

"You fucking write a song like that...and expect me to be okay with it? No. I can't do this, I can't fucking do this anymore. It's too hard" she murmurs, although it's said more-so to herself. Naomi merely remains a bystander, watching the redhead while she attempts to keep her own self together. Attempts to keep silent while her heart beats painfully in her chest.

"I know. I'm sor–"

"And you don't even care. You're off fucking Effy, acting as if everything's okay between us, when I'm fucking going crazy here. When I'm fucking feeling like this. Nobody should have to go through this, it's too hard" she continues, her eyes becoming glossy now. Naomi pauses. Runs over the girl's words in her head, and suddenly realizes that not everything is adding up. "I can't be your friend when you don't even care. It isn't going to work. I'm always going to feel this way, and I can't even do anything about it because you're with Effy and I'm nothing more than a friend to you–"

Emily's rant is well and thoroughly cut off as Naomi lunges forward. She can't help it. Emily's words. Emily's voice. The misery. The defeat. The utter agony. It doesn't sound like something a friend would say. So it's then – while Emily's eyes are blazing with fire, while her body is wracked by grief – that Naomi finally puts two and two together. And suddenly she can't get close to Emily fast enough.

She throws her arms around the petite girl's body, one arm locked around her waist and the other wrapped up in her long red hair, and crushes their lips together. Emily squeals against Naomi's lips in surprise, but soon gives up any attempt at resistance when Naomi guides them back towards the wall. Their bodies collide, flush against one another, and Naomi is left to drown. Drown in the exquisite taste of Emily's lips finally, _actually _against hers. And better yet, Emily is kissing back. Those lips are kissing her back, and they're softer and needier than Naomi can ever have imagined. It's too much. It's too much fucking happiness for one person to handle.

She glides her hand from around Emily's waist and clutches at her hip instead, her nails digging in. Emily's hands come up to link around her neck in response, the sensation sending ripples up Naomi's spine. Then the blonde untangles her fingers from Emily's hair and places her hand gently on the girl's cheek. Opens her mouth further to deepen the kiss and slip her tongue into Emily's mouth, to which the redhead obliges.

A soft moan escapes Emily's mouth, and it causes another shudder to fly through Naomi's system. She's on fire. Emily's tongue is frantically pressing against hers, and she's ablaze. Are things capable of being this heated? She can't even remember if she ever felt this dizzy, this euphoric with Effy. If so, then it was a long long time ago.

But then a thought manages to cross her mind – which is quite a feat – and she abruptly pulls away from Emily's lips, resting her own lips against the redhead's ear. "It...it was for you. It's always been you, Ems" she whispers softly, and she's shocked by her own honesty. She's never felt so controlled by her emotions before – normally it's her head that does all the talking. But it seems to have been the right thing to say, because Emily pulls back and looks deep into Naomi's wild blue eyes. That sparkle is back in those brown eyes, and Naomi's never been happier to see it. All that anger and despair from just a few moments ago has all but disappeared, and in its place is one of the softest looks Naomi's ever seen. It makes her stomach fizzle with happiness, her heart thump in triumph.

"Did that really just happen, or am I imagining things?" Emily asks, and her voice is unbearably husky and tentative. It makes Naomi blush. Makes a beam break out over her face as she stares down at the redhead.

"I think it did" she replies, laughing awkwardly. She rearranges her hands, linking her fingers around Emily's back against the wall. "Otherwise we've both gone crazy" she adds, her smile turning into a smirk.

Emily giggles happily then, and fuck Naomi if it doesn't sound _girly. _It makes the butterflies flutter around her stomach some more. But then Emily's expression changes, and a seriousness sweeps over her face. She lowers her hands, leaving one to rest at Naomi's collarbone and the other to twirl with the ends of her blonde hair. Naomi watches her all the while, eager to know what the redhead is thinking. What's brought them to this. Does Emily feel the same way as she does? Is she actually gay? Or is this just a thing, an experiment? Convenient?

"Ems?" she pushes gently, and feels Emily's body quiver underneath her fingertips at the use of the pet name. The redhead lets out a long sigh then and finally raises her eyes to meet Naomi's. Remains silent for a few more moments, before eventually parting her slightly swollen lips to speak.

"Naomi, I...I don't know–"

"Emily! Where the fuck are you?"

The loud, obtrusive voice of Katie rings through their ears, and suddenly Emily's pushing Naomi away as if she's being scalded. The blonde ends up several feet from her, and abruptly feels ten times more cold than she did when she first stepped out here.

"Emsy! Em– oh thank fuck, there you are you silly cow!" the blonde hears then, and unconsciously turns her head toward the top of the alley. There stands Katie, arm slung through the arm of some polo-shirt wearing, creatine-muscled guy. She's wobbling a bit in her heels, and has a sloppy grin on her face. _Shitfaced, _Naomi thinks automatically. "Hey Naomi" the twin says to her, throwing her a hasty smile. Then she looks back at Emily. "Jesus, where you been Ems? This place is brilliant! This is Brian, I met him here" she says, her slurred voice turning very generous whilst she gestures to her bloke. He looks thoroughly disinterested in introductions, but is making a fine job of looking like a lecherous creep while he eyeballs Katie beside him.

Naomi drags her gaze away from them and – with great effort – looks back at Emily. Her stance is rigid, and there's a fixed smile on her face. More notably though, she's not looking anywhere near Naomi. "Nice to meet you" the redhead murmurs, stepping forward and waving in greeting. The guy's eyes light up as he takes Emily in.

"Hold up...are you guys twins? Wicked! Today's my lucky day" he says in a gruff voice. He jostles Katie's arm a bit with his and wiggles his eyebrows, but Katie merely rolls her eyes and scoffs. Emily smiles awkwardly. The blonde can see that she's wringing her hands anxiously.

"Don't listen to him. He's a tosser" Katie says, elbowing him lightly in the ribs. Brian chuckles, but then Katie returns her attention to Emily. "Anyway, as I was saying, the club's finished up now and I was thinking that Brian could come back to our place with us, yeah?" Katie explains, her glazed eyes flickering pointedly back and forth between Emily and Brian.

Naomi looks past Katie's shoulder. There's a steady stream of people strolling past the alleyway. Everyone's leaving, which means she'll have to go find the others soon. But there's something in Katie's words that irks Naomi, and she can't help herself when she voices it. Finds that her emotions are thoroughly in control of her today. "It's not _your _place, Katie. It's Emily's" she points out, her tone stern. Naomi senses Emily's gaze tentatively flicker over to her then, and the feeling pierces at her like a knife. She tries to meet those eyes, but Emily looks away too quickly.

Katie snorts, undeterred. "Whatever. She's my sister. That makes it as good as mine" she says brashly, and Naomi can't help but raise an eyebrow. Can't help but wait for Emily to fight back, to say anything, and more importantly acknowledge _her_ presence rather than just stand there like a mute. But Emily says nothing; the redhead nods slowly, letting an empty smile flash across her face.

"Sure. Of course" she says, her voice now back to that dead sound again. Naomi grimaces. Feels utterly confused and pained by Emily's drastic change in demeanour. This isn't the girl that Naomi knows. The girl Naomi just – _holy fuck –_ kissed. She finds that Emily turns into a whole other person around her sister. She's not sure if she likes this Emily. Emily's stronger than this. Emily's not a pushover.

Katie smiles widely, biting her lip. "Great. I already get your coat for you, babes. Let's go now, yeah?" she instructs, lowering her arm and linking her fingers with Brian's. Panic rushes through Naomi's veins as she watches Emily step forward to retrieve her coat from Katie. Feels her chest seizing and her palms growing sweaty again.

"Wait!" she shouts, a little more desperately than she would have liked. All three of the others stop, and Naomi hesitates. Fixes her gaze upon Emily, who's looking very white all of a sudden. "Can I...can I just speak to Emily for a sec? Please?" she asks, her voice weak and pleading. Emily still doesn't look at her, but Katie sighs and rolls her eyes.

"Fine. Me and Brian will go get a taxi. Be ready in two minutes, okay Emsy?" the twin says, her gaze flashing between Emily and Naomi in confusion. Then she steers herself and Brian towards the main street, and immediately Naomi stalks forward until she's right in front of Emily.

"Emily, what's going on? What's this all about_–_"

Naomi's urgent questions are abruptly cut off when Emily rushes forward and grabs her face with both hands, hastily pushing their lips together. Her words die in her throat as she feels Emily's soft pink lips caressing her own again, the pace much more gentle and tender this time. But there's also a desperation Naomi can sense, can feel _– _the redhead's fingers are gripping her face a little too hard, and she can hear little whimpers escaping her throat.

"Hey, hey" she coos while pulling away. She takes Emily's hands in hers and looks deep into the girl's suddenly fearful brown eyes. "It's okay. What's wrong?"

The redhead reluctantly meets her concerned stare and bites down hard on her lip. "I'm sorry. Katie, I mean...it's just bad timing" she mumbles inarticulately, her eyes hastily flickering all over the place. Naomi doesn't speak, although remains silently dubious. The last thing she wants is for Emily to be regretting what just happened. Especially when she's not sure what to make of all this herself. In a matter of minutes, they've gone from being friends to being...what exactly? And the funny thing is that although she never chases _–_ ordinarily just gets up and moves on _–_ this time she's actually dreading whether or not Emily will reject her. It was bad enough contemplating the loss of their friendship...but this has the potential to be something. Something she doesn't want to lose.

Eventually Emily lets out a soft sigh, raising her hand to stroke it along Naomi's cheek. "I can't do this. Not tonight, anyway" she says quietly, although hastily adding the last part upon feeling Naomi twitch in panic. A sheepish smile spreads over her face, and Naomi's eyes search hers expectantly. She tries desperately to conceal the hurt she secretly feels at Emily's words. "Tomorrow. I promise. We'll talk tomorrow" she whispers reassuringly, and leans forward to place another soft kiss to Naomi's lips before backing away entirely.

Naomi's struck dumb. Just about manages to mutter out a silly, "Okay", at Emily's retreating form.

The redhead pauses just as she's about to round the corner, and offers a soft, "Goodnight Naomes", before disappearing.

And Naomi is left in that dark and dingy alleyway. Is left to think about the rollercoaster of emotions she's experienced tonight – the fear, anxiety and dread; all morphing into lust, euphoria and happy disbelief; turning back into sorrow, loneliness and grief again. And she knows she couldn't feel more alone right now if she tried. Can only pray that Emily keeps to her word, and talks to her tomorrow. Because no matter how much she'll try to brush things off like she usually does, like with Effy for instance...she knows she'll end up wanting and waiting to hear that husky voice again.

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	13. Insomnia

_I know. I'm sorry. There's no excuse for such a late update. Especially after leaving you all hanging like I did. But I'm literally swamped with stuff to do, and exams are fast approaching. Plus, my writer's block got pretty bad during the interval. I just hope this chapter makes up for my disappearance, although it could be awful for all I know. It's a shortish one, but I figured you guys deserve an update._

_I don't own Skins, oh as is life._

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* * *

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The phone brings many things. Relief. Panic. Apprehension. Anticipation. Giddiness. Butterflies.

Just feeling, mostly.

Naomi hasn't slept. Has been on autopilot from the moment she'd watched Emily's small and chagrined form retreat out of that alleyway. From the moment she'd watched Emily abandon her. But after staring at the spot from which she'd disappeared for a good ten minutes, her feet directed her back into the club. It was empty by the time she returned to the stage – only Freddie, Thomas, a couple of employees and the other two bands were left amongst the wreckage.

She didn't join them at first. Watched them from the shadows instead, silent and curious. Thomas' silky, easy voice. Freddie's effortless lopsided smile, pulled all the more askew by his slight inebriation. The laughter they all shared, the other lads jeering and chuckling along as well. Envy had pricked at her, but it was not enough to break through the numbness. What she wouldn't have given to be in Freddie's shoes then. Carefree. Happy. While she was trying to keep herself from deteriorating. The questions. Pulling at her from the inside. But she pushed it all back. _Morning, _she'd commanded herself. _Just until morning. Then I can breathe. _

The moment has come. The phone bells tauntingly on her nightstand while she's sitting on her bed, and although she's been waiting all of eight hours for it's sound through a painful night of insomnia, she finds she can't even answer the fucking thing now. Her fingers are frozen, her motor skills all but failing her. She leaves it for a good ten seconds or so, sure that it's bound to stop at any moment while she just stares at it dumbly, but then the voice of her subject of obsession drifts into her head. _"Tomorrow. I promise. We'll talk tomorrow"._ The voice is as steady now as it was then. As sure as the real thing. And it's soon followed by an image. An image where those bright brown eyes are staring up at her adoringly. Right after they'd kissed.

She answers without another moment's hesitation. "Hullo?" she murmurs hoarsely, her voice raspy from lack of use. There's no reply at the other end. She can hear her though. Her soft, quiet breaths. Immediately Naomi can tell they're a bit more laboured than they usually are. It's something she's noticed. Whenever the redhead is apprehensive about something, her breathing grows imperceptibly tighter and harsh. Even through the phone she knows. And that makes her feel a little more justified in how she's feeling.

"Hi" mumbles a painfully timid voice eventually, and Naomi feels the first flicker of emotion she's felt in hours. There's a long pause. "I'm keeping my promise" Emily says then, her voice a little stronger now. A small smile tugs at Naomi's lips. Even in the most awkward of situations, Emily always manages to make her smile. It simultaneously comforts her and irritates her in this instance.

"Yeah. So I noticed" the blonde says eventually, trying to keep the sarcasm out of her voice. It's a defence mechanism, but she knows it's not appropriate for this moment. Knows this is completely serious. She bites hard on the inside of her cheek, inadvertently opening the wound from last night in the process. She ignores the taste of blood in her mouth. "Do you regret it?" she blurts out then, ignoring her sense of tact as well. Oh well. Straight to business then.

There's another long pause, and Naomi hears those breaths puff out a little harder. "No. Not for a second" the redhead whispers huskily, and Naomi's stomach gives a feeble little lurch of happiness. _But. There's always a but, _she reminds herself swiftly, and waits for Emily to continue.

"But" Emily murmurs, and Naomi has to keep herself from scoffing. "You know this is complicated...don't you?"

Naomi hesitates. Understands what Emily's trying to imply. Of course this is complicated. They're friends. What happened, what could happen...it has the potential to change everything. Even though they've only known each other a short time, Naomi can't bear the thought of losing Emily over this. She's spent so much time in this secluded little world she's created for herself, yet somehow she's glad that Emily's become a part of it. It makes her feel less alone. Less lonely.

Then there's everything else to think about. Everyone. Effy. A nauseating sensation wracks through her abdomen as the brunette's eerie presence suddenly – finally – washes over her. Effy always knows how to dig deep to the core. How to crawl beneath one's skin. But this is something else entirely. Although she's not even here, Naomi abruptly feels those piercing eyes boring into her from all sides. The blonde had managed to keep her mind off of the brunette up until this point. She'd numbed the guilt. But now Effy is everywhere. And she knows. How could she not? She's been fuming over her and Emily for weeks, but it never became a problem because Naomi knew nothing could never happen. Would never happen.

Well, turns out there's a problem now.

_"Why her?" _she'd asked. Naomi's face scrunches up at the mere memory of the agonized sound of her voice. "_Why not me?" _Truth is, Naomi will never be able to answer that question. Because she doesn't know either. Wishes she did, because things would be so much easier otherwise. She could just carry on living this easy lifestyle. No feelings or people or potential pain to deal with. Just herself. And Effy lets her do that, no questions asked. But she can't help it. It's her heart, not her head, that pulls her towards Emily whenever she's near. And she's starting to enjoy the feeling. Starting to enjoy letting someone else in.

"Naomi?" Emily's unsure voice suddenly cuts in. The blonde realizes she's been silent for a good thirty seconds or so whilst her mind was off in space. But Emily's husky voice brings her back. So she pushes Effy, pushes everything else away for the moment. _Later, _she decides. _I can think about them later. _Emily is definitely her first priority.

"Yes. I know it's complicated" she answers monotonously. Then she licks her lips, tasting dry blood. "It doesn't have to be, though" she adds quietly, her voice uncharacteristically uncertain. There's an edge of hope tagged on at the end, but Naomi feels her stomach drop when she hears the redhead sigh defeatedly.

"Effy" is all she says in reply, and the blonde grimaces. The image of the enigmatic brunette tries to force its way back to the front of Naomi's mind, but she just pushes it back again.

"I'm not going out with Effy" she says defensively. Emily snorts. The blonde continues on hastily before Emily can interject. "I swear. Yeah we're...seeing each other, but...that's all we've ever been doing. She's not my girlfriend. It's the same way for her" she tries to reason.

Emily sighs again, and Naomi can picture a sad look on her face. "I don't believe that Naomi. And somehow, deep down I know that you don't either. Despite what you might tell yourself" the redhead explains, her tone a little more steely now. It surprises the blonde. "You can't just be with someone for so long and not _be_ with them...somebody will get hurt and..."

She doesn't finish her sentence, and Naomi can sense something deeper is at play. Nevertheless, she presses onto the urgent issue at hand. "Okay, forget about Eff for a second. What about us?"

Emily pauses. Naomi can only wait. The hard stuff's coming and they both know it. "I don't know Naomes. I really don't" she says despondently. "But that's not the point, is it? What do you expect to come out of this anyway?"

The directness of Emily's question catches Naomi off-guard. On the one hand it sounds like a challenge. On the other a threat. A double-edged sword. "Well I, uh..." she stammers feebly. She pauses to take a deep breath, calming her rapidly beating heart. Emily waits, her quiet breaths still audible down the line. Naomi in the meantime tries to think of what to say next. Anything that could steer the outcome of this conversation in the right direction. Then it hits her. "Are you gay?" she blurts out. Okay. Could've been a little more delicate. _Fucking mouth, _she mentally scolds herself.

Emily giggles uneasily, clearly amused by the lack of grace of Naomi's question. It's then that the blonde's grateful that Emily can't see her face; a blush begins to burn at her cheeks. But then Emily abruptly stops laughing. "Yeah. I'm gay" she says, her voice becoming quiet and husky again. Naomi feels a tentative smile pull at her lips.

"Really?" she asks dubiously, needing full conformation.

Emily laughs again, and the sound lessens Naomi's anxiety. "Yes! Alright?" she says, her breathy voice incredulous. "I'm gay as a window! Is it _that _hard to tell or something?"

Naomi hesitates, biting her lip and rolling her eyes with amusement. The ghost of Emily's hot and feverish kisses remains on her lips, and the mere memory of them is enough to send a chill up Naomi's spine. _There's definitely nothing straight about the way Emily kisses, _she hastily concludes. She awkwardly tugs and fiddles at the duvet beneath her. "No. I suppose not" she concedes. There. It's out in the open. Emily's gay. Maybe all that flirting-but-not-flirting they'd been sharing over all this time wasn't as imaginary as she'd first assumed...

"Listen Naomes. I like you, okay?" Emily presses on, all rather quickly. The unexpected admission causes Naomi's heart to flutter and a beam to break out over her face. But the redhead's not finished. "But...I should be asking _you_ all the questions. You kissed me, but you're going out with Effy. What the hell am I supposed to do? I don't deal with cheats Naomi, but I like you and–"

"Hey hey" the blonde interjects desperately upon hearing the panic rising in the redhead's voice. "I know, okay? It's fucked up. But, I like you too" she admits hesitantly. Fuck. She feels like a soppy little teenage girl. Oh well. Only for Emily. "What do you want me to do?" she asks, no hint of apathy in her tone.

Emily stays silent for a long beat, but when she speaks again her voice is unwavering. "I'm going home for Christmas with Katie. My parents live just outside of London" she explains. Naomi raises an eyebrow in confusion, but Emily answers her unspoken question. "I don't know if we have potential, Naomes. Well, I _won't_ know until you sort this out. You need to talk to Effy". Naomi's eyelids wrench shut. She knew that course of action was going to come up sooner or later. Doesn't mean she has to like it though.

"I know" she says in a weak voice, and her words are laced with truth. "I'll talk to her. I'll try".

Silence again, and then; "Good. If you can do that, then we can...well, we'll see how things pan out" Emily says, her voice clipped. Naomi senses that the conversation is coming to a close. Knows she won't be able to think let alone talk about potentially having something with Emily until she talks to Effy. It's the right thing to do. She just has no clue what she's going to say.

"Yeah, um...I'll see you after the holidays, so" she says, attempting to leave things between them on a somewhat positive note.

Emily laughs awkwardly. "Merry Christmas Naomi" she murmurs.

Naomi smiles weakly. "Merry Christmas Em" she replies. There's no 'goodbye' to follow it up. Naomi hears a dial tone and knows that's it. She's on her own now. So she hangs up her phone and chucks it aside before flopping onto her back on the bed. "Fucking great" she whispers aloud, dread seeping through her. She hasn't seen Effy since last night, and even then it was before she'd brushed her off and sent Cook to look after her. She doesn't even know where the brunette ended up. Hopefully she somehow made it home to her apartment, although that might be asking a bit much considering the state she was in.

It's then that the guilt well and truly hits. Stabs, more like. At last. There was genuine pain in Effy's eyes last night. And now Naomi was going to have to admit that something happened with Emily. That she basically proved Effy right. If she doesn't, she'll be letting Emily down as well. Fuck. This is why she hates caring. It overwhelms her. Things used to be so much simpler. Except she'll just have to get on with it now. Because she certainly cares what Emily thinks. Cares about Emily.

She hears loud footsteps then outside her door, coming from the hallway. Quickly realizes that Freddie's up. Tries to rearrange her face, masking her inner turmoil before she gets up to join him for breakfast. Real life awaits. Only now, she's never been so afraid to face it.

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	14. Where the Heart Is

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The excruciatingly cheerful yellow door flies open, revealing a middle-aged woman of average height with untidy blonde hair and warm brown eyes. Eyes that are of stark contrast to the cold blue ones staring back at her.

The woman's eyes light up as they fall upon the girl in front of her. "Naomi! Love!" she exclaims, hopping past the doorstep and pulling Naomi into a warm embrace. Naomi places her arms awkwardly around the woman's waist, never having been particularly comfortable with exchanges of affection throughout her life.

"Hi mum" she mumbles into messy blonde hair, repressing the urge to sigh tiredly when she feels the arms around her squeeze a little tighter. Eventually Naomi manages to shrug her way out of the hug, but is merely met with bright brown eyes gazing back at her when she pulls away.

"So glad you're back love. We'll have a lovely quiet Christmas to ourselves this year. Just us Campbell girls" her mum says, throwing her a wink.

Naomi smiles in spite of herself. Then raises an eyebrow. "Quiet?" she asks dubiously, seeming to recall that things in this house were rarely quiet whenever she came round to visit.

The older woman merely chuckles lightly and smiles. "I'll explain everything inside. Come on then, in ya pop". Naomi doesn't enquire further. Instead obeys her mother's orders and picks up the suitcase at her feet before stepping through the doorway, the door closing after the both of them.

Ten minutes later and Naomi finds herself sitting at her old kitchen table. The wood is still as worn and smooth as when she last sat at it. Her gaze instinctively flutters downward to the corner of the table, where she sees the little heart she carved into the wood when she was ten. In any other household, she would've been scolded for such an action. This was the Campbell house though. Such bouts of 'creativity' were often encouraged. In fact, she distinctly recalls her mum admiring her handiwork when she first discovered it. Naomi smiles fondly at the memory, but rolls her eyes all the same.

A heavy clinking reverberates up from the wood and Naomi looks back to see that a cup of steaming tea has been placed in front of her. The blonde watches as Gina Campbell sits herself in the chair adjacent to her, own mug of tea in hand and a content smile across her aging face. "So, what's going on with my darling daughter nowadays?" she asks cheerfully. "Soared to the top of the charts yet, have you?"

Naomi giggles. "No. I don't think we're _that _good yet, mum. You'd have to be very good to knock those other pop knobheads off the charts" she explains dryly.

Gina quirks an eyebrow. "So what you're saying, is that you're worse than a bunch of knobheads?" Gina retorts, taking a sip of her tea to hide her smile.

Naomi scoffs and furrows her brow. "You wouldn't understand" she replies huffily.

Gina shakes her head. "I grew up in the era of 'Queen' and 'Blondie', pet...of course I wouldn't understand what you lot listen to" she says knowingly.

"Careful mum. Your age is showing" Naomi throws back, grinning to herself before taking a sip of her own tea. Then she glances about the room. The first thing she notices is that it's much tidier. In fact...she can't remember the last time she saw the kitchen this tidy. Ordinarily it's strewn with banana skins and old spliff butts. It's then that she recalls their exchange on the doorstep. "So what's the story around here? Where are all those hippies and leeches?" she asks, throwing a quick glance over her shoulder just to make sure that none of them are skulking behind her.

Gina chuckles at her daughter's actions. "Gone, love. The maintenance became too much to hack on my own, so when I started asking for rent they all hightailed it".

Naomi scoffs disbelievingly. "Guess they lacked a sense of common decency as well as a sense of personal hygiene" she muses aloud, earning a laugh from the both of them. But then Naomi stops, something occurring to her. "Wait a minute...are you having trouble with the house?" she asks, eyes narrowing. Gina shakes her head, a soft smile twitching at her cheeks.

"No Naomi. It's fine. Just kind of hard to pay for things when you've got fifteen other people living with you, you know?" she says, somewhat sarcastically.

Naomi smirks. Ah. So that's where she gets it from. "Seriously though" she counters. "You're helping to pay for my tuition. If you need anything else, I could–"

"Why Naomi, don't tell me you're actually showing concern for your batty old mother? I think you've gone soft" Gina interjects, brown eyes glinting. Naomi's top lip curls up into a snarl. She blows a raspberry at her mum, making sure to follow it up with a bemused look.

"You really baffle me sometimes, you know that?" the younger girl replies, a surprisingly warm gleam shining in her blue eyes.

Gina takes a long sip from her cup and smacks her lips together. Then fixes Naomi with a steely stare. "So do you. But I wouldn't have it any other way" she replies coolly, winking again. Naomi represses a small smile. She'd never admit it, but she agrees with her mum. They may not always get on, but they share a mutual understanding of one another.

It makes a welcome change from the mess she's left behind.

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The snowflakes fall slowly, lightly. Each one's descent like a dance on it's own. The deep black sky, twinkling with stars, acts as a background to these lone travellers.

Naomi watches them fall absentmindedly as they continue to form a coat of snow across the ground. Her front garden is now covered in a light dusting of it, blanketing all green from view. Lying undisturbed as it is, it's breathtakingly beautiful. A pensive smile tweaks at her cheeks as she exhales a puff of smoke. She'd always loved snow. Not even in a physical or an aesthetic sense, but for what it does to the world around her. It makes the air she breathes crisper and cleaner. Like all the bad toxins from the world have been eradicated by this humble, frozen precipitation. Leaving nature to renew itself again.

She sighs deeply, breathing out the last remnants of nicotene from her mouth. Too bad it couldn't cover up the toxins in her life too.

A creaking sound pierces the silence. She turns her head rapidly in its direction, only to find her mother peering down at her while she stands next to the ajar door. "Need some company?" the older woman asks. Naomi surveys her for a moment. The crow's feet are bunched up around her eyelids while she smiles and waits expectantly.

Naomi raises her cigarette to her lips and takes a long, exaggerated drag. Makes sure to keep her expression neutral. "I suppose it couldn't hurt" she replies detachedly, exhaling another long stream of smoke into the night air. It's the best answer Gina will get, and she knows it. Sure enough, Naomi feels the bench beneath her dip slightly as her mother takes up the space beside her.

"Mind if I have one?" she asks cheerfully after a moment. Naomi glances sideways and raises her eyebrows.

"I thought you quit" she says, more teasing than accusing.

Gina smiles wryly. "I have. Doesn't mean I can't have one every once in a while" she reasons, shrugging. Naomi doesn't comment. Sees a severe lack of logic in her mother's words, but doesn't bother to nag her about it. She isn't exactly a great role model herself in that area. So fuck it. She pulls her ciggie pack and lighter out of her sweatshirt pocket – her _new_ woolly sweatshirt, a Christmas present courtesy of her mum – and hands it to Gina. The older blonde takes it with a nod of thanks and pulls out a fag. Then rolls the valve of the lighter with her thumb until a lone yellow flame bursts out of it. Lowers the end of the cigarette to it, igniting it quickly. "Cheers" she says, handing the items back to Naomi. The blonde smiles quickly and puts them back in her pocket before silence falls between them. "You barely touched your plum pud" Gina says a few minutes later when her cigarette is already halfway finished.

Naomi is already onto her next one. "'M not hungry" she mumbles noncommittally. Her sight flickers across the street. Two kids, a boy and a girl, from the house across from theirs have come outside to play in the snow. They're all wrapped up in coats, woolly hats and snow boots. Their dad is watching them from the doorway, a warm smile on his face while he cautiously keeps an eye on them. Naomi represses a smile and tugs the beanie on her head further down to cover her ears.

A scoff from beside her brings her back to earth however. "Bloody hell Naomi! You eat twice your own body weight on Christmas Day most of the time. You'd think you'd just come from a famine sometimes, what with the way I have to wrestle your plate off you" scoffs Gina lightheartedly. She stubs out the last of her cigarette. "Suddenly you're not hungry at all?"

Naomi shrugs, not appreciative of her mum's observation. "Guess not" she answers dryly, taking another long drag. Silence falls between them again for another few minutes, during which time the children across the road return inside. No doubt to play with their new toys or to engage in the festive spirit. _Bullshit, _Naomi thinks pessimistically. She's not usually this grouchy at Christmas, but there's a lot of stuff on her mind. Finds she's just not up to appreciating much right now.

"Okay. What's going on with you?" Gina says eventually, almost as if she's read her daughter's thoughts. Naomi exhales another puff of smoke from her lips, masking her surprise.

"What do you mean?" she replies evenly.

Gina sighs. "I'm no fool, Naomi. You've been here over two days and I've practically had to drag conversations out of you. Normally we'd be at each other's throats by now" her mum says. Naomi laughs, but the sound comes out unintentionally sardonic.

"So you're annoyed at me because I'm _not_ being a bitch to you?" she asks disbelievingly, smirk firmly in place as she looks at her mother.

Gina quirks an eyebrow. "Not annoyed, pet. Just worried" she says, her expression softening now. "You seem to be off in your own little world. Like something's troubling you". Naomi purses her lips. Raises her fag to them and takes a final, tight drag before stubbing it out on the wood beneath her.

"I'm fine" she says curtly, before casting her eyes out over the garden once more. _Drop it. Please just drop it, _she silently pleads, knowing things might become too overwhelming if she were to start discussing things properly.

Nothing's said from beside her. The blonde has to keep herself from breathing a sigh of relief. "Who is it that's bothering you?" Gina says after a long moment.

Naomi grits her teeth. Spoke too soon. "Nobody's bothering me, alright?" she says, failing to cover up the defensiveness in her tone.

Gina snorts loudly and Naomi quickly fixes her with a hard glare. Her mum merely shrugs. "Sorry, but you've never made for a convincing liar" she says. "So, who then? Cook? Is he still being a pervy little dicksplash?"

Naomi raises her eyebrows and laughs disbelievingly. "Fuck's sake mum!" she exclaims. Then rolls her eyes. "No, it isn't Cook. For once" she answers begrudgingly.

Gina rolls her lip between her teeth and furrows her brow. "Oh, well then if it isn't Cook then it must be, uh, em...that other girl you mentioned before. Buffy or something" she tries.

An odd feeling flows through Naomi's system just then and she very nearly lets her expression falter because of it. Even after a year or so of being together, Gina still hasn't met Effy. Nor can she remember her name, apparently. Yet it's only now, in the midst of all the shit she's going through, that Naomi realizes how significant that is. She swallows thickly. "Her name's Effy, mum. And yeah, I suppose she's got something to do with it" she murmurs weakly.

Gina nods, her stance softening. "Having some girl problems, are we?" she asks, giggling. Naomi can't help but snigger too. To most other mothers, that would be something you'd say to your son. Not with the Campbells' though. Sometimes Naomi forgets how lucky she is to have a mum who really couldn't give a toss as to who or what she's dating. As long as she's happy. Another sensation wracks through her body, only this time it feels distinctly warmer.

"Guess you could say that" she says, hesitating. She sighs and flickers her gaze her back and forth between her mum's caring face and the continuously falling snow ahead of her. "Girls plural, though" she mumbles, flushing.

Gina's eyes light up as comprehension sweeps across her face. "Ah, I see" she says knowingly, her gaze abruptly becoming distant. Naomi's blush intensifies. Fucking hell. She never was good at 'sharing' with her mum. They always had this little way of getting on and communicating without having to delve into personal issues. But she really is stuck on this one, and hence is becoming desperate. Naomi watches patiently as her mum's eyes snap back into focus. A wry smile twitches at her cheeks. "So, who is this other woman?" she asks.

Naomi rolls her eyes, biting back a smile. "Emily. She's a freshman. Doing arts. I met her at the start of term, kind of randomly actually. But she's...she's just nice, you know?" Naomi says quickly. "Anyway...things kind of...changed between us this past week. I don't know what to do about it. On the one hand, I like her and I like being around her. A lot. But on the other hand...I don't know what to do about Effy. I don't know how I feel about possibly ending things between us. We've been through so much together and I do love her, I think, and I'd feel like a sack of shit if I were to just end things so suddenly. 'Cause now I'm starting to think that she likes me way more than she's always let on and...and...what do you think I should do?"

Naomi's practically breathless by the end of her tirade. Her piercing blue eyes are wide and panicky as she stares at her mother, openly begging the woman for some sort of guidance. Some sort of indicator as to what she should do and what's the _right_ thing to do and..._bloody hell, how do people deal with this kind of stuff all the time? _she thinks sourly to herself.

Gina stays silent for a long time, her eyes distant once more. Naomi becomes frustrated as the seconds tick on. Is about to whinge some more when suddenly Gina starts...laughing. Seriously. She's laughing. "What the fuck is so funny?" the blonde enquires indignantly, anger flashing across her face.

Her mum chuckles on for a few more moments before falling quiet again, an amused grin still spread across her face. "I think you just answered your own question love" she says simply. Naomi's eyebrows raise up her forehead.

"What?" she asks stupidly.

Gina folds her arms across her chest. Her smile turns wistful. "Honestly Naomi...if you're thinking that much about how you should go about things with someone, and not how you _want _to go about things, then I think your path is pretty clear". Naomi tilts her head to the side slightly, surveying her mum through narrowed lids. Gina rolls her eyes. "You're trying to see who you should be with. I can see those cogs whizzing about in that idiosyncratic little head of yours, pet. Don't think I can't" she explains knowingly. "You're trying to see who's best for you, when what you should be thinking about is who's _right_ for you. Who makes you happy. And Naomi, darling...you never 'think' you're in love with someone. You know. You _know_ you love someone. No if's, and's or but's about it".

That odd feeling swells in her chest now, and the pressure makes it difficult to breathe. Her eyes start to burn. "I love Effy" she whispers, her voice breaking as tears begin to pool in her eyes. Jesus. She knew this would happen. Knew her emotions would get the better of her if she started to think about things too much.

Gina smiles sadly and reaches out a hand. Lays it softly on Naomi's cheek and wipes the escaping tears away with her thumb. "I know you do. Just not that way" Gina says kindly.

A dry sob bubbles up Naomi's throat. She doesn't have the will to argue. Because she knows her mum is right. "I don't want to hurt her" the blonde whispers, her voice crackling with sadness now. She tugs ineptly at her sleeves just for something to do.

The thumb sweeps across her cheek once more. Her eyelids flutter closed. "Sometimes we have to hurt to help" Gina murmurs wisely. Naomi's eyelids pop open again. Gina's brown eyes are filled with love. "It'll be hard at first. For the both of you. But it'll be for the best. Trust someone who knows". Naomi's eyes narrow slightly, before realizing what it is her mother's implying. Her dad took off when she was just a baby. Left her and her mum to fend for themselves. But Gina always said it was the best thing to ever have happened to her. Because her dad didn't love Gina like she loved him back then. And things could have turned out so much worse if she hadn't found that out as early as she did. So she claims, anyway.

Another thought occurs to Naomi then, and her stomach twists at the thought of it. She swallows a lump down her throat just as her mum gently removes her hand from her cheek. "What if...what if Ems does the same to me that I'm going to do to Eff?" she asks almost inaudibly, unknowingly voicing one of her biggest fears. If she really were to start something up with Emily, there would be many repercussions. Because there's a big difference between her feelings for Emily and for Effy. She could grow to love Emily. She knows that. Knows. Like her mum said. And the feeling terrifies and excites her all at the same time.

But Emily doesn't have nearly enough to lose going into a possible relationship. She could just break things off and move on. Naomi on the other hand...she has everything to lose. If things deteriorated with Effy, then the band could deteriorate right along with it. Relations could, no, would become tense within the group. The only friends she's ever known could go plummeting down the drain. All because she was, ultimately, trying to do the right thing. Trying to spare Effy from further pain. So if she were to take this fall with Emily...she has to have one-hundred percent certainty that Emily will be there to catch her. To back her up when things get nasty. Because they will get nasty. And she'll need someone in her corner when that time comes.

Gina simply cocks her head slightly and stares at Naomi as the tears begin to dry on the blonde's pale cheeks. "I don't know Emily, love. This is literally the first I've heard of her. She very well_ could _do that to you" she says evenly. Naomi's stomach twists even tighter, but the ghost of a smile graces Gina's lips. "But you know what? You have to find that out for yourself. You'll never know what could've been if you don't take that chance in the first place. Sure, I took a chance a long long time ago...and I got you, didn't I?"

Naomi sniffles loudly, rubbing her nose on her sleeve. She pushes her hat down further, feeling slightly naked all of a sudden. "But...I–"

"Like I said Naomi. I don't know Emily. You haven't even told me what she looks like. But you know what I do know? The moment her name left your lips, your eyes lit up like the sun".

Naomi coughs, literally choking on her surprise. "Really?" she asks, flabbergasted.

Gina nods, her smile widening. "Yep. I may not know Emily, but if anyone can make you look like that then they're good in my books" she says plainly. Naomi can't help it. She smiles. Feels the whirlwind of emotion inside of her threatening to bowl over, and doesn't know how to contain it. Realizes she's been emotionally exhausted over what's happened lately.

"C'mon then crybaby" her mum says abruptly as she gets up, seemingly calling time on their heart-to-heart. "If you're not hungry, we could have some hot chocolate? You always used to feel better after one of my hot chocolates" she says, turning around to peer at her daughter. Naomi stares up again into her mother's loving face. She knows Gina is trying to deflect her attention, but she can still read the sentiment in her eyes: _everything will be alright. Trust me. _And it may be the emotion talking, because normally she holds a solid front when around her mum, but for the first time in a long time, she does. She believes her.

So Naomi gets to her feet as well. "Lead the way" she mumbles, smiling ineptly. She follows her mother, hopefully shutting out her anxiety with the door behind her.

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_No Naomily story is complete without the awesome Gina Campbell. That woman is the shiz. Oh and Hack, hope you caught the little something that was meant for you! Really enjoyed writing this chapter and I hope you enjoyed reading it. Review!_


	15. The End Is Where We Start From

_Getting a bit better with the updating, right? Hopefully it lasts..._

_You know the story: Skins isn't mine. Never will be. Boourns._

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It's too soon when Naomi comes to a stop outside the all-too-familiar door. She'd been hoping that time might just slow down. Allow her to remain at Gina's; outside and disconnected from her world – the real world – and all the shit for just a little while longer. But as she's learned all too well by this stage, life can be a harsh motherfucker at the best of times. So here she stands like a child in trouble outside the principal's door.

She lets out a weary sigh. "Come on. You can do this. Now or never" she quietly goads herself, her fingers curling and uncurling into fists. It's at least another two minutes before she finally manages to raise her left fist and knock her knuckles against the hard wood. The impact however causes the door to tremble, and consequently creak open.

It's unlocked. Odd.

Although thrown off a bit, Naomi wills herself on. Cautiously pushes open the door and peeks her head inside. Her blue eyes cast themselves around and the first thing she notices is that the place is a mess. Well, _more _of a mess...for some reason it seems even less tidy than it normally is, with copious amounts of food wrappers, bottles and cigarette butts lying around all over the place. There's also the distinct smell of spliff hanging in the air, and her nose crinkles at the potency of it.

"Christ" she breathes disbelievingly, at last stepping completely into the room to have a proper look around. Her eyes flicker around a bit more, her confidence dwindling with every passing second. "Eff?" she calls out weakly, the apprehension and the sickly sweet taste invading her throat causing her mouth to become dry. She looks to the bedroom door and sees that it's closed. Steps on an empty crisp packet as she approaches it. "Uh, Effy? You in there?" she tries once more, her voice coming across as sceptical now. Her hand reaches out to the doorknob, but just as she's about to turn it she hears a noise from inside. A noise that causes a jolt of simultaneous shock and anger to fly through her system.

Groaning.

Her face screws up once the shock subsides and the anger hits full force. "What the fuck?" she roars while bursting through the door. Sure enough she sees two people – guy on top, girl on bottom – going at it in Effy's bed, only ceasing their panting and moaning to look up at Naomi in bewilderment and shock. "What do you think you're doing? You can't just...you can't...just..." But her words die in her throat once she finally catches a glimpse of their faces. Naturally she's never seen the guy before, but...she has also never seen the girl before. It's not Effy.

"Um...what do you want?" the guy gruffly asks, making no move to remove himself while the blonde just stands there stupidly. He's got long, shaggy brown hair and a chiselled face, but Naomi doesn't allow her eyes to flutter anywhere below his neckline. She isn't sure which feels worse – the embarrassment at having barged in on two strangers fucking, or the disgust at the fact that they're making no move to cover up their decency.

"Oh erm, I was...I was just, um...l-look...looking for..." she stutters ineffectually. She feels like she's having an out-of-body experience. _Is this really happening? I'm in the right apartment, aren't I? _she begins to wonder, repressing the urge to glance over her shoulder just to make sure it is indeed Effy's living room she just came from.

"If you're looking for that brunette girl, she's in the bathroom" says the girl from the bed. Her voice is low and syrupy, but Naomi doesn't have any urge to see what body accompanies the voice in fear of getting another eyeful.

"Right. Uh so, thanks. I'll...I'll just..." she mumbles helplessly, before simply turning her back on them and closing the door. Her hand remains gripped to the knob behind her while she tries to regain a grip on reality. On whether or not that really did just happen. But sure enough, it doesn't take long for the panting to resume and Naomi removes her hand as if she'd been scalded.

Still in a state of shock, she decides to act on the one piece of direction still fresh in her mind. Moves her feet slowly toward the nearest room to the left, where sure enough she sees a hazy covering of smoke just beyond a gap in the bathroom door. She tentatively pushes the door open with her fingertips, almost afraid she'll be greeted by something worse than what she'd just witnessed. Luckily for her, she's safe – Effy is lounging in the bathtub, her feet dangling over the side with a spliff hanging lazily from her lips and smoke swirling above her. Not only that, but she's laughing. At first Naomi isn't aware why, but when she looks to her right she soon comprehends.

Another girl is sitting on Effy's toilet – lid down, thankfully – and is also smoking a joint. She's got long and matted fair blonde hair. She's decked out in piercings; several in her ears, lips and nose. Despite this, she's noticeably quite attractive – bright green eyes and thin, supple lips that are stretched into an easy smile whilst she sits there in Effy's company. There's dashes of neon paint all along her arms. Naomi has clearly walked in on some joke of theirs, because they're both laughing that lazy, rumbling laugh you make when you're high. Either way, Naomi's not impressed; the smoke is stinging at her throat and eyes, and she's still shook from what she'd just walked in on.

"Effy" she says firmly, her voice surprisingly steady. Effy's eyelids pop open to reveal bloodshot, dilated pupils. A look of vague surprise crosses her pallid face for a moment upon noticing Naomi's presence in the doorway, but it quickly changes to one of amusement.

"Ah Naomi, babe" the brunette drawls lusciously, a dark chuckle following her words. She takes another long drag from her joint and blows the smoke effortlessly from her lips. "You're back" she says pointlessly.

The other girl giggles. Naomi isn't amused. "Yeah Eff. I am. And I was calling for you just there. Why didn't you answer?" she asks, her eyes narrowing.

Effy flicks some ash onto the bottom surface of the tub. Her feet wiggle as her legs still hang over the edge of the tub. "Musn't of heard you. Me and Jess here have been having some wicked fun, haven't we hun?" she says dismissively, flapping her arm uselessly towards the other girl.

Jess, or whoever the girl is, lowers the spliff from her lips and smiles lewdly. "Yeah we have. Eff and I had a whopper night last night" Jess says. Her tone is hoarse and low because of the weed, but otherwise she's got a surprisingly feminine voice – one that contrasts her appearance somewhat. Naomi had been expecting a huskier voice. "Dunno where we ended up but...all I know is that there was lots of paint and glowsticks and fucking ace music" she regales happily. Another toke. "Then we came back here. I tell ya Natalie...this is a proper girl here. Knows how to have a good time" she says on her exhalation.

Despite having been just called Natalie, Naomi is more focused on the inadvertent implication behind that sentence. And sure enough, when her gaze flickers back over to Effy it's to see those pale – yet dilated – eyes trained on her. Naomi can see a streak of the aforementioned paint across Effy's cheek. Bold red. There's the ghost of a smirk on her chapped lips. "Yeah. She does" Naomi answers sadly while she watches Effy sink lower into the tub and throw her head back. She curls her legs into the bath with her. The blonde sighs harshly. "Eff...I just walked in on two people shagging, yeah? Who the fuck are all these randoms?" she asks bluntly then, folding her arms.

Effy extinguishes her spliff on the edge of tub next to her. "It's the holidays Naomi. Lighten up! Not as if anyone else has been around here anyway" she says. It's said casually, but there's a heavy undertone to her words. An undertone that rubs Naomi the wrong way.

"Well...I'm back now" she replies, somewhat defensively. "And I...I need to talk to you. It's important. So could you...do you mind if we, uh...speak privately?" she says bumblingly, feeling entirely self-conscious with the other girl's prying green eyes staring up at her curiously.

Effy breathes out slowly and deeply, her eyelids fluttering closed as her head lolls back even further. "Sure Naomi. We can...we can..."

She trails off, and only a few moments later her breathing evens out. Jess chuckles from below. Naomi has to keep herself from glaring at her. "She won't be doing any talking right now, Blondie" she says, unsteadily rising to her feet. Naomi winces. Cook's nickname for her has never sounded so foreign. "Might follow her lead actually. Couch sounds good, don't ya reckon?" she says. Without waiting for a reply though, Jess steps out of the bathroom and into the living room. Naomi's only left to stare at Effy's limp and oddly serene form slouched in the bath.

She rolls her eyes. "Fuck's sake" she growls. Unable to stand the smell any longer, she follows Jess out.

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There's something new on the corkboard. An old photo of herself. She knows it's old because her hair is shorter. Her expression is harder. But it's not even this that first grabbed her attention. It's the little piece of paper posted beside it. It looks like it's been torn out of a textbook. _"There's no art to find the mind's construction in the face". _She knows what it's from. 'Macbeth'. Only did an assignment on it a couple of weeks ago. The only worry is why it's tagged alongside her own face. _Is this really how she sees me? _she thinks, yet another sensation of guilt and despair stabbing at her again. She sighs and chews apprehensively on her lip. _She doesn't trust me. _

After cooling down for a bit, Naomi began to realize that she wasn't very justified in how she'd been feeling earlier. There she was thinking Effy was the one cheating on her, that Effy has been the unfaithful one...yet she's come over to essentially break things off between them. _Hypocrite, _her mind hisses severely. Her stomach clenches. This is going to be difficult. This is the first time her and Effy have spoken since she'd left. Couldn't bear facing her so soon after what she'd done. Needed to clear her head. Yet she just about managed to throw her a pathetic _"Merry Christmas x" _text on Christmas Day, only to receive no reply. She didn't blame Effy for that. Felt entirely cowardly for having sent it in the first place. Yet now here she is, expecting Effy to just sit down and listen to her pathetic excuses. When Effy has essentially spent Christmas alone. Naomi had been with her mum. Cook and Freds had their own arrangements as well. It was just her.

It's always just Effy, at the end of the day.

She hears a heavy footstep against the wood. "Where's Jess?" asks the extremely scratchy voice of Effy from the doorway. Naomi looks around. Sees the normally enigmatic form of the brunette hovering wearily in the doorway, her arms raised out to the wall to steady herself. She's only wearing a long t-shirt, which barely comes down to her thighs. Her skin is grey and drawn. Her blue eyes are uncharacteristically dull. The harsh streak of red still blazes across her cheek.

Naomi glances back around to look at the corkboard. Finds looking at Effy entirely difficult right now. "Gone. She crashed out on your couch for a while but then got up and left to get stuff for a grilled cheese sandwich. Hasn't come back".

There's silence while Effy contemplates this. "Right" is all she says, before Naomi hears her footsteps approach. When the blonde feels her reach her shoulder, she doesn't wait for the proceeding awkward silence. Rattles off the first thing that comes to mind.

"I had to kick those other randomers out though. Needless to say they weren't too happy. And, uh...you might want to wash your sheets" she says, her voice high-pitched and unnatural. She throws a glance over her shoulder towards the bed and crinkles her nose disdainfully. Then smiles tightly. "Some wild parties you must have been having around here, Eff. Place is a bit of a kip, I suppose...it probably won't take long to clean up though. Maybe when you've sobered up a bit we could–"

She chooses that inopportune moment to look at Effy at last, and sees those searching blue eyes boring through her. Despite being bloodshot, they've gathered some heat within the last few moments. "What do you want, Naomi?" she asks monotonously. A hint of venom coats her name as she says it, but it's enough to cause a shudder to rip silently up Naomi's spine.

She feels her stance soften. Sadden. "To talk to you...to see how you are" she mumbles weakly.

Effy nods curtly. Naomi watches as the brunette steps away from her and crosses the room to her nightstand. Pulls out the drawer and takes out a beaten-up carton of ciggies. Offers one to Naomi, who declines, before sitting down in an armchair in the corner of the room. "Wrong way round" she murmurs quietly.

Naomi furrows her brow. "Sorry?" she asks in confusion.

Effy shakes her head, a sad smile pulling at her lips. "Nothing" she says, taking a drag. She blows out the smoke and fixes Naomi with a firm stare. "Well. Talk then. Did you have a nice Christmas?" she asks, voice clipped. Again disdain creeps into her tone, and Naomi swallows thickly.

"Yeah it was...it was nice" she says timidly. Her hands feel awkward at her sides. She unfurls her fingers and raises a hand up to tuck some hair behind her ear. "Mum's fine. Got me this jumper" she says, tugging ineptly at the woolly jumper she's wearing. The small box inside her pocket jiggles at the movement. "She um...she got rid of those people in our house too. The place was so quiet. Couldn't believe it". She tries for a weak chuckle, but Effy's expression doesn't even flicker. She merely takes another drag, her eyes distant.

"Nice" she plainly says, running a hand through her scraggly brown hair.

Naomi nods stupidly, biting her lip. "So, um...what did you get up to?" she asks.

Effy shrugs. "Nothing much. Partying, clearly" she says. Another drag. Exhale."Tony came to visit".

Naomi's eyes widen. "Tony...what?" she croaks out.

Drag. Exhale. "Yeah. Tried to pull that brotherly bullshit on me. Tried giving me a present and all, but I just shoved it back in his face. Wanker" she explains, her voice too dead to be sincere. But then Effy's pale eyes flash up to Naomi, daring her to say something. The blonde wishes she was sitting down. Feels entirely too naked standing here by herself.

"Must have been nice to see him though" she tries ineffectually. Attempts a smile.

Effy stubs out her cigarette on the wall behind her, charring the wallpaper in the process. "Not really" she says, crossing her arms over her chest. It adds to the way her legs are curled beneath her. Makes her look entirely too much like a little girl right now. There's clearly something she's not sharing. But falling back into old patterns, Naomi doesn't delve. Doesn't try to scratch beneath the surface. _It's not my problem. It's her business. It's not my problem, _she tells herself on repeat.

As if sensing her discomfort, Effy sighs heavily and cocks her head to one side. Eyeballs Naomi. "Enough about that though. That's obviously not why you're here" she says, a weird smirk plucking at the corner of her mouth. "Come on Naomi. Tell me something true".

Naomi is taken so off-guard by her directness that she literally chokes on a cough. "Oh, well I uh..." she splutters out eventually. She's growing increasingly hot around the collar whilst continuing to stand on the stage Effy's set for her. Desperately wants to sit down somewhere; the bed is out of the question and the floor seems a little inappropriate for the situation at hand.

Effy doesn't make any move to coax her. Why should she though? She just continues to sit there; legs and arms curled into herself and expression stoic and quietly blazing. The contrast between the two is distinct. "Tell me" she says, enunciating the syllables. A flash of something crosses Effy's eyes. Like all those other foreign emotions Naomi's witnessed on the brunette as of late, it throws her off. So much so that she goes entirely off-script.

"I kissed Emily" she blurts out, hand flying to her mouth as soon as it's said.

Effy's expression doesn't waver. Only her mouth gives her away. That strange smirk twists further, contorting her face slightly. "Is that all?" she says, her voice unnaturally even. Naomi feels her brow crease. That was all wrong. She was supposed to have eased Effy into it. Supposed to have recounted the good times they'd shared, how much they'd grown together...and then mention how they were growing apart. How it was time for something new. She wasn't supposed to throw _Truth. Boom. _right into Effy's lap.

So why isn't Effy breaking right now?

Naomi can only watch as Effy suddenly prances to her feet and crosses the room to look at the corkboard. Comes to rest at where Naomi had been standing a few minutes ago. Her t-shirt has slumped down her shoulder, leaving her swallow tattoo in full view. The dim light they're standing in makes it look strangely dark and sad. "Why aren't you mad?" Naomi finds herself asking, unable to hold herself back. She knows she's being a shit. Being a shit for doing this at all. Having cheated on Effy. Kind of. But a part of her feels indignant at how blasé the brunette is being. Feels hurt that she's not more angry by her betrayal. Naomi knows _she_ would be, if the situation were reversed.

But Effy merely laughs an empty laugh. When she turns around, that sadistically cheerful smile is all the blonde can see. "Why would I be mad? It's not as if I didn't see this coming a mile off" she says detachedly. She scoffs. "I mean, you've basically been eyefucking her every time you see her. You'd have to be blind not to see that you want to shag her brains out–"

"Don't, Eff" Naomi growls, suddenly wishing she hadn't asked anything at all. Her chest tightens at the concealed acerbity in Effy's voice. She knows Effy is all-being and all-seeing, but has it been _that _obvious? Has she been living an obvious lie right in front of Effy's face, all this time? Nevertheless, she needs to press on to the issue at hand. "I care about you. You know I do" she murmurs, voice cracking. "I just...I just thought..."

"You don't have to think about anything, Naomi" Effy interjects, shrugging ineptly. "I know what this is. You want to cool off things between us? I get it, it's fine" Effy says, all rather quickly. She whirls around, her back facing the blonde once more. Naomi watches as her arms go up to cross over her abdomen again.

"That's not what I meant, but..." she mumbles, trailing off. In all honesty, Effy's implication is correct. It's just the phrasing that's off. Naomi sighs harshly, linking her fingers together anxiously. "Listen...I don't want to leave things like this, so...are you okay?"

There's a long pause. As time ticks on, Naomi experiences the pressing urge to go over to Effy. Comfort her. Hug her perhaps, although it would be entirely uncharacteristic of her. But something in her mind holds her back. Keeps her from reaching out and leaving Effy with something substantial. "I'm okay" the brunette says finally, again in that even tone. Then she turns back around slowly. There's no smile this time, but her eyes look very far away. "I'm not upset, if that's what you're worried about. Nobody breaks my heart" she says, running a hand hastily through her hair. Then she hesitates and fixes Naomi with a narrowed stare. Approaches tentatively, her eyes flickering back and forth between Naomi's own. Then reaches a finger up to her own cheek and draws it through the streak of paint there. A blot of red coats her fingertip when she pulls it away. Drags it slowly, achingly slowly, across the blonde's cheek. Naomi's breath hitches at the contact. When Effy pulls her hand away, she laughs weakly. The sound is hollow. "This was always just a 'thing' for us. We had fun". She walks back over to the armchair and sits down again, taking out another cigarette from the pack in the drawer. "See you around" she murmurs, lighting it.

The abrupt dismissal leaves Naomi at a loss. She tries to voice some sort of goodbye. Finds the task practically impossible, so settles on a parting gesture instead. She pulls out the box from her pocket and walks towards Effy. Leaves it on the bedside table next to her. "Yeah, well...I got you that...for Christmas, anyway. I know this is kind of, um...but, I...I hope you like it" she says ineffectually. Effy doesn't even look up. Just stares blankly at a point beyond Naomi's shoulder; her face is expressionless while smoke drifts from her lips. Naomi ineptly swings her arms at her sides. "So, um...see you" she says eventually, before turning around and walking swiftly out of the room. Through the living room and out of the apartment. Shutting the oak door behind her. Shutting Effy behind her. Her fingers feel numb upon releasing the doorknob.

She tries to think about what just happened. What should've been an emotional moment turned out to be the opposite altogether. It was quick. Painless. Easy.

Too easy.

Should there have been tears involved? A heartfelt goodbye, of sorts? No, of course not...they practically see each other all the time anyway. But still...Naomi feels that parting to be oddly...empty. Incomplete. Still, she's not entirely sure how these things go. Avoids the relationships to avoid the break-ups, essentially. That was what _that_ was, right? A break-up? Yeah, it must have been...I mean, she's been seeing Effy longer than many other people have been seeing each other and...and..._Oh shitting hell, _she thinks, leaning back against the door and letting her head loll back against the cool wooden surface.

She stays like that for a couple of minutes. Allows the truth to seep in. It's the end. The end of her and Effy. The start of something new. Her throat grows dry as a thought crosses her mind. Her hand raises up absentmindedly to stroke at the paint Effy had drawn across her cheek.

The start of something new. With Emily.

This thought in mind, she finds her hand shooting into her jeans pocket of her own accord. Pulls out her phone and hastily scrawls a text, her brain whizzing at a million miles an hour. After several failed attempts of writing something she's happy with, she decides to keep it short and sweet. Short and honest. To the point.

_It's over._

She clicks send and sinks to the ground, her eyes wrenching shut.

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_Not entirely sure how that went to be honest. It's definitely what I had in mind in the context of things, but I suppose I'll have to see what outside opinions I get..._

_Anyhow, I'm actually also going to use this space right now to plug for once, which I don't ordinarily do. I'm sure many of you around here have read 'Abnormally Attracted to Sin' by_ PersephonesNauticalNun _at some point_._ But if you weren't already aware, she has a new story out – 'Octahedron'. It's not only an interesting Emily POV, but it's an entirely unique style of writing in itself. I really recommend it, because it's starting to turn into a cryptic and pretty intriguing read._

_'Till next time!_


	16. Clean Slate

_I had something completely different in mind for this chapter, but this just...happened. I find that happens a lot with this story haha. It was a hell of a lot of fun to write though. Hope you enjoy it!_

_I don't own Skins, but that doesn't stop me from loving Gen 3 :-)_

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"Here ya go Naomikins" Cook says, mischievous smile firmly in place as he discreetly hands Naomi the small bag of white powder. "Finest coke on offer. You're in for a whopper night with that, babe".

Naomi doesn't say thanks. Merely nods curtly and pockets the bag, before whirling around and taking off. Doesn't stop until she's pushed through the door to the bathroom and has locked herself into a cubicle. Sits down on the closed toilet seat, drops her handbag to the floor and stares blankly ahead. Her breathing comes fast and shallow.

There's unintelligible scrawl scribbled all over the door – _"Jessie luvs Danno xx"_ and _"Alexis wuz here"_ are some of many that aim to represent the calibre of literary genius on offer. Naomi chews on her lip, her fingers rolling against the little plastic parcel in her pocket. If she had a pen on her, she'd probably add her own thoughts to the wall. Nothing too inspirational. Nothing to show off her English degree, that's for sure. No. She'd probably keep it simple.

_I am lost._

She hears the bathroom door open. The sound of at least several giggling and squealing girls floods into the room. The noise of the thumping bass they've brought with them from outside becomes muffled once they've shut the door behind them. Naomi continues to sit there for a while, listening to their easy chatter. One of them has spotted the guy she likes. Doesn't know whether to go up to him or not. Her friend chirps in and tells her to go for it. Encourages her. Another one agrees. Naomi sighs quietly to herself, her fingers continuing to squeeze the little bag in her pocket. It's times like these that she wishes she had proper friends.

The girls make to leave, and without any further thought Naomi pulls the bag out of her pocket. She opens it and spreads it's contents out behind her on the tank lid, fixing the powder into a straight line. Then she reaches down to her handbag and fishes a fiver out of her purse. Rolls it up tightly before leaning down, snorting the powder up through it and into her nose. The sensation tingles at first, stings almost, but it soon soothes to become pleasantly numb. She wipes clumsily at her nose before picking up her bag and jumping to her feet. The liquor she's already had makes her unsteady at first, but she swiftly manages to charge out of the bathroom and back into the club. The heat hits her face like a wave, but she embraces it. Knows it'll be much easier to not think now that she's got all these chemical concoctions into her system. She finds a nearby bin to dispose of the empty parcel and then quickly makes her way back into the crowd.

More people have arrived within the last few minutes. The crowd seems thicker. Or is that just her eyes playing tricks on her? The coke kicking in? She doesn't know. Either way, she's not complaining. Makes it easier to hide.

She shoves past a few more people before finding herself in the middle of the dancefloor. There's a heavy dubstep track on, and she finds herself immediately immersed in it. Her body begins to sway of its own accord. Her hips slowly cock from one side to the next, and her eyelids slip closed. She feels the cocaine starting to kick in fully now. Damn. Cook wasn't wrong then. This shit works fast. She feels it's lightening effects begin to take hold of her body; her arms aren't as heavy and her mind isn't as sharp now. She opens her eyes again. People have their hands in the air. That looks fun. She wants to do it too. She raises both arms and waves them. A new song comes on – _Bit of electro. Fuck yeah – _and she waves them some more. She feels a hand brush past the small of her back and she bats it away. It brushes again, grabs, but she fends it off. Not tonight. She doesn't want to be close to anyone tonight. The only person she wants to be close to isn't here. And she has no idea where she is either.

A few minutes pass and she's still swaying solo. The coke makes her want to dance to everything. Makes it all entirely too easy. But then she feels hot breath across her shoulder, and clumsily turns around to find Cook's beady eyes and toothy grin staring her in the face. "'Sup Blondie? Having fun?" he asks, his smile turning slightly lewd. Her vision is hazy, but she can see the black of his eyes. They're both high on the same plane.

"Yeah Cook. Thanks for the pick-me-up" she says, lazy smile stretching across her face. She grabs his hand and pulls him in to dance with her. He twirls her around and laughs.

"High as a fucking kite you are babe" he says, amused.

She merely smirks and ruffles his hair. It's thick with sweat. "Maybe I need to be" she says unhelpfully, shrugging. Another good tune comes on, and she starts to hop around a bit. Cook doesn't say anything else. She closes her eyes once more. Can feel his hand link through hers. He pulls at her and they dance. That's what she loves about Cook. He doesn't ask questions. Anybody else would wonder why it's just them here tonight. Just them...none of their other friends. Anybody else would ask why she needs to get so fucked up. Truth is she _is _fucked up. She's fucked two people up. He doesn't know anything about it. So she wants to forget about it. Just for tonight.

Start the new year off on a clean slate.

More time passes. _When did it get so hot?_ she realizes. She can feel the sweat coating her skin, feel the heat swelling between her and Cook and all the other people around them. The drugs make her ignore it. Her eyelids slowly open again, and everything is a blur. It's colourful. Trippy. She smiles and lets out a low chuckle. She hears Cook laugh along with her. "Fuck me! It's hot in here!" he exclaims, voicing her opinion. Her eyes fall upon him and she can see the sweat patches across his shirt.

She shakes her head and rolls her eyes. "Pussy" she spits playfully at him, throwing him a lazy wink.

He raises an eyebrow. "Cook? A pussy? Nah mate" he says, a grin widening on his face. "The Cookie Monster can stand any heat. Watch this". Without any warning, Cook raises his arms and yanks his polo shirt off and over his head. Naomi bursts into laughter as he begins to whip it around above them.

"Fuck's sake Cook! Take it easy" she says, although too light-heartedly for it to be serious. Fun. She's actually having fun. Makes a change.

Cook stops, but simply steps closer to her and begins to sway with her again. "You love it, Naomi" he says lecherously, and she gives him a light smack across his bare chest.

They both laugh, and another song comes on. Naomi's about get into it, but something catches her eye. Stops her in her tracks.

Red.

No. It can't be...can it? Fuck. No, surely not. That's impossible.

She puts it out of her mind. The coke helps her with that. So does Cook – he's hopping around now. It puts a smile on her face. But then the red pulls at the corner of her eye again, and she physically whirls around. Tries to see it properly, but everything is too blurry. She bites her lip.

"C'mon Cook. Let's go get another drink" she decides out loud, before grabbing Cook's arm and pulling him out of the crowd. He follows without complaint, but what he doesn't know is that Naomi is trying to get out of there as fast as she can. Desperately wants to get away from the cruel tricks her mind is playing on her. _Maybe the coke wasn't such a good idea, _she thinks sombrely, a hint of sadness finally managing to pierce its way through her high.

Still, she doesn't dwell on it too long. She looks behind her to see Cook throwing his shirt back on. Grins. Eventually they saunter up to the bar; by the look on Cook's face – sloppy grin and glazed eyes – he hasn't noticed anything's off with her. "What ya having?" he asks, throwing an arm around her. His arm is warm and clammy around her neck. She looks sideways at him and fixes him with a lopsided smile.

"Jack and coke" she replies.

He returns her smile and unwraps his arm. Then leans forward and practically shouts at the barman, "one jack and coke and a Heineken my good man!" before turning back around and leaning his elbows against the bartop. "So Naomi, you never told me – how was your Christmas with Gina?" he asks, his voice surprisingly steady.

Naomi raises an eyebrow. "Are we really gonna do the 'catch up' thing tonight?" she asks incredulously. "'Cause I'm not in the mood, to be honest".

Cook shrugs. "Doesn't hurt to ask" he plainly says. The bartender arrives with their drinks then. Cook hands him their fee, then gives Naomi her drink before picking up his own pint and taking a swig. "Well?" he presses.

It's Naomi's turn to shrug. "Good" she says shortly. She takes a hasty gulp from her drink. "It was nice. She's doing good". Cook nods. "How was Keith's?" she asks, eager to deflect the attention off of her. She casts her eyes ahead. Fuck, it's still so blurry. There's so many people. She wishes she was back with them. Camouflaged.

"Ah, you know how things are with me and that fat bastard" he says bluntly, chortling. Naomi scoffs. "As long as we don't get on each other's nerves, we're fine" he says. He takes another large gulp from his beer. "Heard from Eff?" he asks nonchalantly.

Naomi feels her chest seize. Even the coke can't subdue the ache that follows. "Yeah" she says quietly, then sips from her glass.

Cook nods and averts his eyes. "How is she?" he asks, clearly oblivious to the tension that's wrapped itself around Naomi's body.

She swallows. "Fine" she lies in that same curt tone. _Please don't do this, _she thinks desperately to herself. This is what this whole night was about. To forget about Effy. About Emily. Everything. _Don't drag my shadows out, Cook._

Luckily for her, Cook unintentionally leaves it. "Cool" he says, before glancing around distractedly. Naomi watches a flash run through his eyes. "Sorry Blondie, but I'm after spotting a chick in need of some serious Cookie Monster lovin'" he says. Naomi follows his line of sight toward some short, brunette haired girl. Can't help but notice the pushed up boobs and cheap extensions. Not her cup of tea, but each to their own. If it gets Cook off the Effy topic, then she's willing to let him go.

"It's okay, I don't mind" she says truthfully. "Try not to come back with any STDs. Or pass them on, more like". Cook chuckles loudly and gives her a playful shove, before marching over toward the brunette girl. As he approaches she looks sceptical, but within a few seconds of talking to him she's batting her eyelashes. The blonde rolls her eyes._ Girls,_ she thinks sardonically. Ironically.

She continues to sip her drink by herself for a while. The dancefloor has become a ball of mass energy, flickering with colour before her very eyes. She watches for a while, letting the alcohol and the chemicals continue to crawl through her system. She can see pairs of people on the floor. Clearly setting themselves up before midnight. It makes her feel a little despondent. Looks like she'll be starting this year off alone.

But suddenly, it happens again. The red pricks. Blinds. It catches her so off-guard that she jerks and manages to spill the last of her drink on herself. "Fucking hell!" she growls, half in alarm and half in frustration. She puts the now empty glass back on the bar behind her. Raises her hands and runs them through her hair. Groans. There's a cool sweat coating her forehead. She needs to get away from here. For a minute. Needs to get away from the colour, because now it's just turning evil. She forces her legs into action and walks quickly and purposefully across the club. Her vision blurs still, but she ignores it. Meanders her way up a set of stairs and finds herself overlooking a balcony to the dancefloor below. The colours still flash below her, but the red has disappeared. Thankfully.

After a while, she feels a light tap on her shoulder. Expects to find unwanted company. Like that relentless hand earlier. But then she feels someone's light breath puffing into her ear. "You're not imagining things" the accompanying person's voice murmurs hoarsely. The voice causes Naomi to start with panic. She whirls around and comes face to face with Emily. Real, solid Emily. Her hair is tangled and thrown, and her eyes are smoky. Her lips are red and luscious. Her clothes are stylish but effortless.

She's lovely.

Naomi can't speak. Knows her widened eyes must be doing the talking for her, because eventually an amused smile stretches across the redhead's beautiful face. "Hello to you too" she says huskily, the amusement evident in her voice.

The blonde swallows. "But you...you were..." she says weakly, before trailing off. She's of half-mind to think that this is her eyes playing tricks on her again. That the coke definitely must have been badly cut or something. But when she inadvertently moves her fingers a little, they brush by Emily's hand and she knows this is real.

Emily smiles. "I was. But I'm here now" she says unhelpfully. Naomi catches her eye. Her irises are black. She's on something too.

"Um, I uh..." Naomi mumbles, attempting to come out with some form of intelligible conversation. She still can't comprehend this, though. The last time they'd spoken, Emily had essentially been mad at her. And Emily also never replied to her text about Effy. For all Naomi knew, she had broken up with Effy for nothing. Well...not for _nothing_. But it felt that way. And now Emily's here? Did the redhead even know Naomi would be here? Fuck...there's a lot of questions she needs to ask, but isn't of the mind to ask them.

Emily seems to catch onto Naomi's confusion. "I didn't think you'd do it. I'm surprised" she says, a flash of something crossing her black eyes. Naomi doesn't say anything for a moment, but eventually a crooked smile pulls at the corners of her lips.

"Maybe you underestimate me" she counters, her voice steady for the first time. Emily's smile widens to a beam, and Naomi can't help but beam along with her. But then her gaze darts past the blonde's shoulder, and Naomi looks around to follow her line of sight. Her eyes fall upon a large digital timer on the wall above the dancefloor. Its time reads 23:58. Immediately alarm bells begin to go off in her head, and sure enough when she looks around it's to see a wry smirk now playing on Emily's red lips.

"Come on" she murmurs simply, grabbing Naomi's hand and pulling her away from the railing. The redhead's skin feels soft and warm against her own as their fingers interlink. Naomi watches her hips sway as they descend the stairs. She practically has a swagger going on. Naomi can't help but appreciate it. She doesn't know where this cool, confident Emily has come from – literally – but she definitely likes it. Finds the heavy sensation on her chest gone all of a sudden.

Emily continues to pull her until they're both at the edge of the dancefloor – still in the thick of things, but not being crushed by the swelling crowd. She turns to Naomi with an unreadable expression on her face. But Naomi doesn't care. The chemicals are in control of her now, and for once she's sure of what to do. She steps close, achingly close to the redhead until their bodies are pressed flush against one another. Places her hands somewhat hesitantly on Emily's hips. Then looks deeply into Emily's eyes, and if it's possible the black there has widened even further. She has no doubt her own eyes look the same. She feels Emily's arms snake up around her neck.

"You look gorgeous" the blonde blurts out stupidly, finding her mind to be no longer in control of her mouth.

Emily giggles in an almost girlish way, before fixing the blonde with a sceptical eyebrow. "You don't look so bad yourself, Naomes" the redhead replies, her voice unwavering. The compliment and the pet name cause a blush to creep its way up Naomi's neck. But before she can say anything else, a chorus of voices begin to sound from all around them.

"Ten...nine...eight" they all chant, and Naomi's head whips around to see the timer slowly whittling its way down to the new year. She catches Emily's eye again, and is surprised to see a much softer look on her face now.

"I didn't expect to be having my new year's here...with you" she confesses. A look of sadness flickers across her face for a split second as she says it. Naomi is about to enquire, but her attention is drawn away again.

"Three...two...one...HAPPY NEW YEAR!" the crowd all bellow. A stream of confetti begins to fall over everyone. Naomi watches the couples around them share the traditional New Year's kiss. She feels Emily's fingers on her chin then and looks down to see those brown eyes looking up at her expectantly. Her throat grows dry, so she swallows to clear it. Then tentatively leans forward and gently captures those red lips with hers.

Her heart begins to hammer at once. Her brow creases in concentration. All her focus goes into kissing Emily. Summoning all the earnestness she can muster. But immediately she knows this is different than the last time. The last time, it was all desperation and heat and pent up frustration. Now...it's soft and tender and full of the potential of what's to come. Because there's nothing left to hold Naomi back anymore.

Nothing except herself, that is.

Emily's lips move softly against her own, her mouth only opening up a little. Naomi doesn't mind. Feels the pace they've set is appropriate in light of what's happened. Yet kissing Emily like this – kissing her at all – causes her stomach to flutter and her mind to haze. There's no-one, nothing around them anymore. She raises one of her hands and cups Emily's cheek softly, stroking a thumb across her skin. Emily responds by tangling her fingers through Naomi's hair. The sensation causes a moan to inadvertently erupt from Naomi's throat. It's with this verbal interruption that Emily pulls slowly away. Naomi reluctantly opens her eyes, only to have her stomach flutter even more at the honest sparkle in Emily's dark eyes.

"Happy New Year" Emily says huskily, almost sheepishly.

Naomi smiles. "Happy New Year, Em" she replies softly, before capturing Emily's lips once again in a more fervent kiss.

.

A few hours later, Naomi finds herself stumbling out of the entrance of the club. Emily's at the end of her arm, and they're both giggling and flapping around like schoolgirls. Other people are stumbling out after them – it's the end of the night, and everybody's pretty pissed. Hence why nobody takes notice of Naomi practically groping Emily on this very public street.

"Jesus Naomi, keep your hands to yourself!" Emily squeals, although all rather playfully. They clumsily manage to wander over to a nearby wall, just at the mouth of an alley. Naomi shoots Emily a bashful yet suggestive smile.

"Sorry, can't help it" she replies honestly, her tone hoarse. Emily's cheeks tinge slightly pink in colour, but she merely rolls her bottom lip between her teeth and scoffs. She sneaks a hand up to the nape of Naomi's neck and draws her in. Naomi goes gladly; their lips meet in a soft yet heated kiss, and when the blonde pulls away her vision is cloudy. That may just be the drugs wearing off though. "I still can't believe you're here" she says breathlessly, and her eyes wander adoringly over Emily's face as she says it.

The blush returns to Emily's face, only it's more prominent this time. A soft smile overcomes Naomi's face in spite of herself.

It's been a hell of a night. What started out as a way to drown her sorrows turned into a emotional whirlwind for Naomi. After the countdown, Naomi and Emily spent the rest of the night making the most of their high. Dancing. Drinking. Touching. Kissing.

Lots of kissing.

But more than anything, it showed Naomi exactly why she fancies Emily in the first place. Emily is, quite simply put, _fun. _The blonde can let her hair down with the redhead. Can let her troubles take a backseat and not have to worry about them. Can be herself, and have that be okay. And although she ordinarily wouldn't leave her true self out in the open so much, in fear of getting hurt...she found that the combination of being around Emily and the drugs tonight meant her inhibitions were greatly lowered.

Emily smiles crookedly and fiddles with a strand of Naomi's hair. "You should know me better by now" she says in a hushed tone. She stares Naomi in the eye. "Besides...I wanted to see you" she admits, even more quietly.

Naomi feels her stomach bubble. It's been doing that a lot tonight. "I'm glad you came" she admits, no waver to her voice. She's about to lean forward again to give the redhead a peck, but a yell from a familiar voice tugs at her attention. She glances over her shoulder to see Cook with his arm slung around that tart of a brunette; both of them are swaying and stumbling dangerously. Like most of the other club-goers in the area, they're in search of a taxi. Naomi realizes she should probably look for one too. It's very cold, and she doesn't fancy sticking around in some dirty alleyway all night.

"I see Cook had a good time" she hears from beside her, and looks back at Emily to see that she too is watching Cook.

Naomi grins. "You know him. Throw him a girl and he's happy" she says dismissively. She steps away from Emily then, taking her hand. "What do you think? Should we get going?" she asks.

Emily hesitates for a moment. Naomi watches as an unreadable look crosses her face, but she can't understand what's behind it. It only takes a moment however for a smile to return to Emily's face. "Sure" she simply says. Naomi nods and begins to pull the redhead by the hand towards the curb. It takes a good fifteen minutes – finding a taxi on New Year's is a bitch – but eventually they're on due course for home.

"I think mine is closer" Naomi says, voicing her thoughts out loud. They're about ten minutes into the taxi journey, but when she looks back at Emily in the seat beside her it's to see her looking extremely uncomfortable. "What's wrong, Ems?" she asks with genuine concern.

Emily hesitates again. "Look Naomes, I...had a great time tonight and everything, but I...I really don't think going back to your, um...your place is the best idea" she says in a rush. Naomi merely stares at her in confusion, the remnants of the coke and alcohol still making her thoughts a bit hazy. Fuck. She's in for a bitch of hangover in the morning. But eventually her eyes widen in comprehension. A disbelieving grin automatically makes it's way onto her face.

"Wait...you thought...? Fuck, no Emily! I didn't mean it that way, I just...I meant that my place was closer. You live on campus so I...I figured I'd get dropped first, you know?" Naomi blurts out, her words just as garbled as Emily's.

A couple of seconds pass, during which time Emily is clearly trying to process Naomi's rant. Then she blushes furiously once more. "Oh...I thought...fuck, sorry...I know you wouldn't, it's just...I think we should just call it a night for the time being. You know, after all that's happened" she says hurriedly. Naomi's eyes narrow of their own accord. There's something Emily's not saying, but she figures it's best to leave it for now. Truth is, she agrees with the redhead – spending the night together would not be very beneficial in light of what they've been through. She doesn't want to rush things between them. Knows she wants this to last, much to her own shock.

"It's fine Em. Don't worry about it" she says earnestly, before they both fall silent. The rest of the journey pretty much passes in silence, both of them too tired – and somewhat embarrassed – to exchange any further meaningless conversation. When the taxi pulls up outside Naomi's flat however, the blonde turns to Emily in her seat. "So...you sticking around London this time?" she asks.

Emily smiles and nods tiredly. "Yeah, I am" she replies. Then bites her lip anxiously. "Actually...you doing anything tomorrow?"

Naomi feels her heart skip a little. "Not that I know of" she says evenly.

"You up for getting some lunch? That is...if you haven't KO'd tonight?" she says cheekily.

Naomi quirks an eyebrow. "You're on Fitch" she says playfully. She hands Emily her half of the fare, then opens the door of the taxi and backs out of it. "Send me the time and the place. I'll be there" she says confidently. Emily shoots her a glowing smile just as Naomi closes the door. The blonde steps onto the curb and watches the car pull away. Watches it until it's all the way out of view. Wonders what she's gotten herself into here, as her stomach flutters and her heart beats rapidly.

If things keep going they way they are already, she's in for a pretty amazing year indeed.

.


	17. We Will See When It Gets Warm

_A cute Naomi and Emily chapter for you. Figure you guys deserve one._

_Skins ain't mine. _

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* * *

.

The air is crisp and clean, and it makes her head feel clearer. Less foggy, despite the throbbing sensation that irks at the fore of her skull. The paracetamol is finally starting to kick in, but being outside and moving around helps keep her mind off the hangover.

The quietness of the streets helps too, although it does surprise her how seemingly empty everywhere is. Well, not _empty _– but in London, this is as close to peaceful as you'll get. After all, you'd have to be a fool – herself included_ – _to be caught dead hanging around on New Year's Day. Most shops and restaurants are closed. People are all tucked up at home; either in bed or lazying about. As she should be. Except she's not. No. Instead, she's standing outside the gate of a small park in London, with no idea what lies in store for her or why she's here. Except she wouldn't have dragged herself from her perfectly comfortable bed and warm apartment if it weren't for one thing.

Emily.

Yeah. Turns out all it takes to get a stubborn blonde out of bed is a persuasive redhead. Or more specifically, a persuasive redhead with a surprise in store.

_Still up 4 that lunch? :-) _she'd texted at the impressively early time of ten o' clock. It had taken Naomi a few minutes to shake off the grogginess, all brought about by the comedown and the booze wearing off. When she did though, man, did her mind go on a trip. All the memories of the night before...Emily kissing her...Emily _being _there...it almost didn't seem real. But it was real. It _is _real _– _because Emily was texting her, which meant she hadn't imagined that conversation in the taxi home.

_U know I'm up 4 anything. U on the other hand...I dunno. Sure ur head feels up to it? ;-) _she'd texted back, when her cognition and caustic nature began to slip through the tiredness.

A couple of minutes later, upon returning from getting a glass of water, a new message lay waiting for her. It simply read: _Anything u say? Hmm...I mite just take u up on that. _Naomi had grinned then. An exchange of banterous texts had followed, before Emily finally left her with a series of directions as to where they were to meet.

And that's where she is now...rocking back and forth nervously on her heels, trying her best to hug any warmth close to her in her jacket. She'd forgotten to bring gloves or a hat due to the hangover aftermath, and is now severely regretting it. Her hands are bundled tightly into fists in her pockets as the wind continues to slice past her face. The tips of her ears feel cold. She sweeps a hand through her hair, causing some of it to fall down over her ears to protect them.

As the minutes drag on, she wonders whether she's at the right place. She knows London pretty well, but she's actually never been here before. It's pretty out of the way too. Hence Naomi's surprise that Emily might know a place like this. She looks back around to affirm this notion, casting her tired eyes over the park once more. It seems like more of a quaint garden rather than a park to be honest. She can see several of people traipsing through it, but otherwise it seems rather lonely. An elderly couple; a man with his two kids, who are giggling and running around; a lone woman strolling about. Seriously, why is she here? Maybe Ems made a mistake. Maybe–

"Naomes!"

She starts at the sound of her name being called and turns her back to the gate. Feels the jitters return upon seeing Emily hastily approach, her cheeks flushed and her smile wide. Naomi lets a small yet slanted smile pluck at her lips too. Emily stops in front of her, rucksack on her back, slightly breathless but – considering the circumstances – looking remarkably fresh-faced. Jeez...this _is _the same girl who was out with her last night, isn't it? I mean, she looks fine! Lovely, even. Yet last night Naomi distinctly remembers her being off her face and high as a kite.

An urge strikes her then. She leans in to greet Emily with a hug before either of them can say anything. Wraps her arms tightly around her waist, out of the way of the rucksack, and squeezes. Finds that she wants to keep herself there. Doesn't want to let go.

Still, it has to end sometime. Emily is the first to pull back, but does so with a kind, "Hey, how are you?" coming from her lips. Naomi looks at her face again, and sees that renowned sparkle lighting up her brown eyes.

"I'm good. How about you?" the blonde replies. She feels a slight blush creeping up her neck now. Notices a streak of blue paint along Emily's jawline as she's about to answer.

"I'm great. Little bit tired, but I'm fine" she says.

Naomi can't help but snort, grinning. Emily's brow furrows in confusion. "Honestly Em, after last night? What gives? You look...I mean, you look..." she says, trailing off upon realizing she doesn't know how to describe how Emily looks. Those brown eyes narrow in suspicion while Naomi stumbles over her words. Truth is...Emily could get run over by a bus and Naomi would still think she looks amazing. It's something she's never felt before. And honestly...it has made her feel nervous about her own appearance all of a sudden. She was a little bit worse for wear when she got up this morning, and now worries it's been reflected in her makeup and hair. Eventually though, Naomi manages to release a long breath, her entire body relaxing along with it. "You look great" she murmurs, a sheepish smile spreading over her face.

Emily's stance softens immediately at the compliment. "I don't get bad hangovers...but thank you" she says quietly. "So do you" she adds, and Naomi can detect no hint of falseness in her husky voice. It makes the butterflies flutter in her stomach.

"So, what's the story?" the blonde says then, eager to change subject. "I've never been to this place before" she says, gesturing over her shoulder.

Emily smiles softly. "Not many people have" she says. She steps closer to the gate, right beside Naomi. "My dad had taken me, Katie and James – that's my little brother – into town one day when we were younger. We were wandering around all day, but eventually we got lost. My dad wouldn't admit that though, of course" she explains, giggling a little. Naomi smiles. "Anyway...eventually we gave up and were trying to find our way to the nearest Tube station, when James took off. The slippery little bugger. When we eventually found him again, he was running around in there". Emily gestures to the garden. "Then we just kind of...hung out here for a while. All four of us. It was the least stressful moment of the entire day and I...I come back here whenever I need some peace and quiet". A pensive smile lights up Emily's face. Naomi feels her heart skip a little. Realizes that Emily's after sharing a fond memory with her, and finds herself touched.

"How come we're here then?" Naomi asks, but not unkindly.

In response, Emily merely smirks and shrugs the bag straps off her shoulders. "Feel like a little picnic?" she asks, glint in her eye.

Naomi laughs and shoots her a surprised look. "Suppose" she says, feigning indifference. Emily's smirk grows wider.

Ten minutes later and they've situated themselves beneath a large beech tree, sheltering themselves from the wind. Naomi's hangover is long forgotten. They're both splayed out on a rug that Emily thought to bring in her rucksack. Naomi's currently leaning back on her elbows, tucking into one of the many sandwiches Emily packed. Is trying not to eye up the cupcakes she brought too. Emily is sitting cross-legged next to her – but not close enough. Somehow, a gap was decided upon them when they both sat down. Naomi is busy contemplating on whether or not the distance should be shortened, and how.

"These are well good Ems" she says to distract herself, holding up the sandwich in her hand.

Emily smiles bashfully. "I used to have to make lunches for James. Guess I unknowingly became good at it" she says dismissively, shrugging.

Naomi nods, grinning. "Well...maybe I can be the new James then" she says, winking. Emily scoffs and leans over to shove Naomi playfully. Doesn't move back when she does so. Problem solved.

"Fuck you" Emily says mischievously, laughing. Her laughter is whimsical and melodic. It soothes Naomi's nerves. Soothes her beating heart. She looks around to distract herself again.

"Seriously though" Naomi says. "Why here? I mean...it's lovely, it's a lovely place, but...why'd you bring me?" she asks, growing self-conscious with every passing word.

Emily's expression softens. "When I asked you last night, I forgot that not a lot of places are open today. I was even thinking of cancelling until tomorrow, but...I figured, fuck it. Why not try something different? And I...I didn't really want to wait, if I'm being perfectly honest" she says, her cheeks growing red.

Naomi rolls her bottom lip between her teeth to hide her smile. There it is again. Emily's uncanny ability to show no reservations about being utterly honest and frank with her intentions. It both astounds and scares Naomi.

Scares her in both a good and a bad way.

At the moment, she runs with the former. Completely bridges the gap between the two of them by reaching out her hand. Lies it on top of Emily's, stroking her thumb over the back of her hand. "I'm glad you didn't wait" she says, her voice vulnerable. She's not used to bearing herself so openly. Is going with instinct for once, instead of logic. "I'm glad this is different. I'm glad you're different" she says, her voice growing exceedingly gentle. Naomi means it as a compliment, but knows it could be taken the wrong way. Meets Emily's eye in an unwavering stare, and is relieved to see heat in those deep brown eyes. Relief that suddenly turns into desire when Emily's eyes don't look away.

Instinct takes over again, and Naomi completely closes the distance. Leans up off her elbows and snakes a hand around to Emily's neck, bringing her head down to meet hers halfway. Their lips meet. Softly. Gently. A realization hits her. This is the first time she's been entirely sober kissing Emily. Relishes the fact that she can be as careful and in control of her actions now. Takes advantage of the clarity by merely ghosting her lips against Emily's. Caressing them, so she can just about feel and taste the moisture of Emily's lips. It causes an indescribable feeling to settle in her chest, but she pushes through it. Tries not to gasp when she feels Emily lose patience and push their lips together fully. Not harshly, but still enough to feel every movement. Emily's breath trickles past Naomi's lips. It's warm and sweet. Causes the sensation to swell in her chest.

The kiss remains gentle and tender. Lasts for several minutes or so, before Emily pulls away. Naomi opens her eyes to see dark brown ones staring back at her. Her throat grows dry. She reaches out to Emily once more and brushes back some hair off her face. Emily half-smiles at the gesture.

"So...what do you want to do now?" Naomi asks, her tone surprisingly tentative and hoarse.

Emily bites her lip, a warm look crossing her face. "Does it matter?" she asks, eyebrow quirked. Naomi thinks about that.

No. It doesn't.

.

Several hours later and Naomi still has a grin on her face. She and Emily are walking side by side through the sparsely populated college campus. Naomi's fingers are laced tightly through Emily's. It's still cold out, but the blonde finds that Emily's hands make a nice substitute for gloves.

Overall it's been a lovely day. Despite her nerves and anxiety earlier this afternoon, Naomi's expectations have been blown completely out of the water. After their picnic, the two of them spent the rest of the day pretty much mucking about London. Not doing anything in particular. Just being together.

They got some more food. Stopped and watched some street performers for a while as they were going to pass by. Did a bit of window shopping. Talked. Laughed. Held hands. Kissed a bit more. But more importantly, they got to know each other. As first dates go, it was something to revere. In fact...Naomi can't remember being on a date where she felt so at ease and so connected with the other person. Effy and her had never dated properly, although that was to be expected. They just fell into a routine of sorts, and neither of them thought to question things. With Emily...well...she's beginning to wonder why it's already so easy to just _be_ with Emily.

Should it be this easy?

It's dusk now; the winter sun sports a glorious orange hue as it hangs low in the sky. Naomi – upon her insistence – is walking Emily back to her apartment on campus. It's as they're walking past a window however that Emily abruptly stops dead and sighs. "What's wrong?" Naomi asks, being forced to stop herself because of Emily's hand clutched in hers.

Emily is staring into the window screen, her fingertips scratching at her chin. "There's still some left" she groans, rubbing harshly. Naomi rolls her eyes. Whilst they were window shopping earlier, Emily finally noticed the paint along her jaw when she saw her reflection. Had scolded Naomi for failing to tell her. Apparently she was painting this morning, and had missed a bit when she went to clean herself up. Naomi was more surprised at the fact that she was even up early enough to do anything, let alone 'channel her creativity'. Hell, Naomi had practically been comatose.

Still, the blonde had thought Emily's tantrum to be rather cute though. Turns out she was more embarrassed than angry – but of course Naomi doesn't think to care what Emily looks like. In fact...the paint made her seem more human. Imperfect. Less intimidating. Which is something she is glad to know since they're crossing _that _line.

"I'm getting rather curious about your artistic skills" Naomi simply says in reply, tugging Emily away from the window. Emily resumes walking beside her, albeit grudgingly. The contents of her rucksack jingle on her back. "Especially since you can't seem to keep your art off yourself half the time" the blonde adds, smirking. Emily shoots her an unamused look. "You must show me sometime" she says then, her tone gentler now.

Emily swings their hands between them. Her expression becomes unreadable when Naomi glances sideways at her. "Sometime. Yeah" she says quietly. Then a flash runs through her eyes and she smiles. "If I do that though, you have to play me something" she says, her eyes narrowing.

Naomi quirks an eyebrow. "You've already heard me play" she counters.

Emily sighs and shakes her head. "You know what I mean" she pushes. Naomi feels a thumb stroke across the back of her hand gently. "_You _play me something. Not onstage. Just you" she explains, her expression soft. Naomi blushes upon comprehending what Emily means. She's never really played for anybody one-on-one before. Has always just practiced acoustically by herself. Alone. It'd be a strange experience to play for just one person. One person who makes you feel things you've never felt before, yet at the same time makes you wish you didn't feel them.

Still, she doesn't have to deal with it now. She'll deal with it when the time comes. _If _the time comes.

"Sure" she replies eventually, her voice uncertain.

After a couple of minutes Emily comes to a stop, which in turn causes Naomi to stop as well. They're stood outside one of the Halls blocks, clearly Emily's. Naomi didn't know whereabouts she lived on campus. "Well, this is me" she says pointlessly. Naomi turns to her and smiles. Emily smiles right back. "I had a lovely time Nao–"

The front door bangs open behind them, and out steps a girl. Emily's hand surreptitiously slips out of hers. "Hey Em!" the girl calls, spotting the two of them there. Emily waves cheerfully at her. The girl approaches, her white smile wide. "How's it going bruv?" she asks lightheartedly.

Emily meets Naomi's eye for a second, before her gaze settles back on the girl. "Hey Liv. I'm great, thanks. You look nice. Where are you off to?" Emily replies politely. Naomi remains silent during their exchange, but decides to take it upon herself to affirm Emily's comment. She casts her eyes discreetly over the newcomer's form. There's large, dangling hoop earrings hanging from her ears; a small stud piercing in her nose; her hair is combed up and to one side, with multi-coloured streaks running through dark brown strands. She's wearing a colourful, yet baggy, playsuit underneath her parka jacket. All this taken into account, Naomi finds her to be quite attractive. Feels that odd, angry feeling she felt with Cook that one time ages ago rise within her again.

"I'm off for drinks. Got myself a date" the girl, Liv supposedly, replies contentedly. Her eyes finally meet Naomi's. "Heya. I'm Liv" she says warmly, extending a hand towards Naomi. Naomi takes it and shakes, ignoring her suspicion.

"Naomi, hi" she replies brightly, smiling.

"Cool. So, where have you guys been?" Liv says, retracting her hand. There's a certain something to her voice as she stares at them both, grinning.

Naomi glances at Emily, who's biting her lip. "Just around. You know...messing about the town" Emily says evasively. She smiles uneasily, and Naomi has to keep her eyes from narrowing. "Who's the lucky guy?" she asks.

Liv shrugs. "Ah, just some guy I was with at a party last night. Seems a bit up himself, but hey – if I can get a couple of drinks out of him, then who am I to complain?" she says, winking. Emily chuckles and Naomi cracks a smile too in spite of herself. "Anyway, I'll leave you guys to it. Nice meeting you Naomi" she says then, moving off. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do!" she calls back at the last minute, throwing a wink at Emily over her shoulder. Emily's cheeks tinge slightly pink in colour. Naomi notices.

"So...Liv, huh? Who's she?" Naomi asks, trying to keep the edge out of her voice.

Emily rolls her eyes playfully. "Friend of mine. She lives in the room next to mine. She's a good laugh, but a complete headcase sometimes" she says, albeit affectionately.

Naomi quirks an eyebrow. "She's hot" she quips bluntly, her tone even.

Emily laughs, her eyebrows shooting up. "Yeah, I guess. Why, were ya looking?" Emily jibes, leaning forward a bit to nudge Naomi in the abdomen.

Naomi scoffs. "Nah..._you_ though, well...wouldn't blame you for being tempted" she replies lightheartedly. There's an undertone to her words however. Wonders if Emily can pick up on it. It's not so much Liv that's bothering her. It's why Emily felt the need to remove her hand so quickly when she appeared. Besides...it was clear from Liv's demeanour that she knew they both weren't 'just friends' hanging out.

Emily shakes her head and grins. "Liv's as straight as they come" she says, and as if reading Naomi's mind, makes to reclaim her hand. Naomi lets her, although secretly does so grudgingly. "'Sides...I've got you, haven't I? That's all I need". Emily hesitates then, her expression changing. Naomi's brow furrows in question. "Well...that is...if there's more dates on the cards" she says, and her voice grows small and husky.

Naomi's resentment diminishes in a second. She tugs Emily closer to her body by her hand, so that they're pressed together. Ignores the jingling sound coming from Emily's rucksack at the movement. Stares deeply into the dark brown eyes looking up at her. "I definitely think there's more on the cards" she replies sincerely, a half-smile tweaking at her mouth. She leans down and presses a chaste kiss to Emily's lips. "Although this one could be hard to beat" she says when she pulls back. "I mean...a winter picnic? You're a little romantic at heart, aren't you Ems?"

Emily's blush intensifies. "Maybe" she mumbles reluctantly. "You could try to outdo me, though" she suggests, smiling widely.

Naomi pretends to contemplate. "I could...we'll have to see" she says in a falsely dismissive manner, pulling Emily back towards the door. Suddenly they're back to where they were. Before Liv's interruption. "Thanks for today" Naomi says softly. Seriously. She reaches up and brushes some hair from Emily's face. Watches as the girl's eyelids flutter at the touch. "I'd a great time" she says, her heart pumping furiously in her chest.

Emily nods, her mouth pulling up at one corner. "Yeah. Me too" she says simply, before leaning up slightly. Naomi meets her lips halfway in another soft, yet needy kiss. It's slow and tender, but manages to fill Naomi up on the inside. Makes her feel warm and assured.

She doesn't want it to end.

But it does. She pulls away slowly, opening her eyes to fix Emily with a soft stare. "I'll see you soon" she says assuringly, releasing Emily's hand from her grip.

Emily nods and smiles warmly. "See you" she says. Then retreats through the door and closes it behind her. Naomi waits a couple of moments before turning back around and walking off. Eyes the sun as it finally dips beneath the horizon in the distance, leaving her immersed in a dusty-coloured darkness.

Her thoughts spin continuously around her brain. On how pleasant and lovely this entire day has been. On how funny and cute and nice a person Emily really is. On how easily they get along with each other. And then...how strange it was for Emily to let go of her hand. How she's possibly...ashamed? Of Naomi? Of herself?

Frankly, she doesn't know. Was so used to ignoring any issues with Effy, because it never bothered her enough to ask. But this time _– _for the first time _– _it worries her. Worries her that Emily may have something to hide. And she may not be brave enough to deal it with herself.

She passes through a gate out into the main street. Internally shakes herself out of her head. _Don't think. Thinking just gets you into trouble, _she tells herself soothingly. _Just have fun. You can have fun for now, right? _Yeah. She knows she can. She's the master of being detached. Only perhaps matched by Effy. And it's been, what? One date? _You're reading too much into this, _she concludes, and practically scoffs as she mentally agrees. She can just enjoy herself. Enjoy this new and unfamiliar feeling that Emily evokes within her. Stay the way she is.

For a bit.

.


	18. Facing Consequences

.

The honeymoon period is in full bloom two weeks later. Naomi and Emily have met up several times since their New Year's date, and Naomi doesn't see herself getting bored with the redhead anytime soon.

They've gone to the cinema, gone for coffee, met up one night for drinks and have just generally been hanging out. Enjoying each other's company. Getting to know one another.

Okay, well...to be fair Naomi already _does _know Emily quite a bit, considering they were friends first. That's the thing though, isn't it? Once you've crossed that line, from friendship to a romantic relationship, you realize there's all this stuff you didn't really notice about the other person before.

Take Emily, for instance. Naomi has only now started to notice the redhead's little tendencies. The way she twirls her hair when she's bored. The way she bites down on her lip when she's nervous. The way her eyes light up when she's really happy.

Naomi's especially noticed the latter lately. Silently hopes it has something to do with herself, because she sure as hell has been feeling a lot happier lately.

Today comes as an exception though. Right now she's sporting an uneasy frown on her face while she steers herself along the familiar route to Cook's place. Thinking about Emily won't help her today for once, although it does lessen her tension a little. What lies in wait for her is something she can't brush off, can't ignore. She finds her skin becoming flushed as Cook's place draws nearer and nearer. Finds herself suddenly wishing that her friend lived farther away.

It's been two weeks since New Year's night – the night things changed between her and Emily. Unfortunately, it's also been two weeks since things ended between her and Effy. So far Naomi's managed to do a pretty good job of avoiding the brunette, both physically and in conversation. Freddie's brought her up once or twice, but even then Naomi's been able to give a satisfying response and change subject quickly enough. It's times like those when she loves Freddie – he can be quite simple-minded sometimes, and doesn't tend to read too much into things. Which suits her perfectly fine.

Then there's Cook. Luckily for her, he's been out of town for the past week with Keith on business. She can't possibly fathom what 'business' Keith would have to attend to – his dingy excuse for a pub isn't exactly anything to be proud of. Still, it got Cook out of her hair for a bit. Meant that there wasn't a chance for him to brush upon the state of her and Effy's relationship.

She might just be being paranoid, but she has a feeling Cook knows something's up. A couple of days after New Year's they were chatting over the phone and the conversation turned to the brunette.

"_Haven't heard from Eff for a while. She ain't picking up or phone. What's up with her?" _Cook had asked curiously.

Naomi had hesitated for a moment. Was about to ask why she should know, when she remembered she was _supposed_ to know. To Cook, they were still together.

"_Oh, I dunno" _she'd started nervously, trying to hide the surprise in her voice. _"I just think she's in a bad mood after the holidays. She, um..."_ Naomi had wracked her brain, trying to come up with anything that might explain Effy's behaviour without implicating herself in the process. _"She said that her brother visited her at Christmas. Wasn't too happy about it. She'll come round eventually, don't worry" _she'd lied quickly, eager to steer the conversation elsewhere as soon as possible.

There had been a long pause at the other end of the line, Naomi remembers, which in turn caused her breathing to pick up. Then, to make matters worse, Cook's reply panicked her even more.

"_Ya sure that's all that's bothering her?" _he'd asked. His tone wasn't accusing, but it was too even for Naomi's liking.

"_Y-yeah. Positive. She'll perk up, no worries" _she'd lied again.

Lies lies lies.

Cook had mumbled something in response, but then thankfully changed topic. Told her he was off with Keith during the next week, and that their next practice session would take place once he was back.

Well...that time is now. She got the call yesterday saying all of them were to meet up. So Naomi now approaches the drive of Keith's house, where Cook lives and where the band practices in the garage. She still, even now, often finds herself wondering how Cook's uncle sticks the noise they must make. But then she remembers the man's a big, smelly drunkard who, when not working or watching telly, is snoring loudly away in his bed or drinking himself stupid.

She swallows heavily as she wills her feet up the concrete driveway, her breathing shallow and her mouth dry. She's no idea if Effy's already here, but whether she is or isn't doesn't matter. It's still going to be awful either way. This is the first time they'll come face to face since that fateful day, and Naomi dreads how the brunette is going to act around her.

Will she hate her? Be cold to her? Or, more excruciatingly, will she be absolutely fine?

Still, the blonde has to face things sometime. Can't hide behind this blissful facade with Emily forever. She eventually comes to a stop and stoops down to grip her fingers under the garage door, pulling it up with a groan. Relief floods through her when she sees only Cook inside. She's the first one here.

"Sup Naomikins" her friend says cheerfully, shooting her a smile.

She steps forward and lets the door fall shut behind her. "Hey Cook" she says, stepping towards him. He spreads his arms out wide and envelops her in a tight hug. His shirt smells vaguely of sweat and aftershave.

"Have a good week, princess?" he asks, releasing her.

"Yeah, not too bad" she replies lightly, although she can't help the smile that follows. What she really wants to say is that she had a fucking amazing week – amazing because of Emily. But she can't. Because to anyone other than and Emily and herself, they're just good friends. She knows she can't admit otherwise, because that would inadvertently reveal that her and Effy are over.

"What d'you do?" he asks.

Naomi shrugs, flopping herself down onto the couch at the back of the room. "Nothing much...did some coursework, hung out with Freds, you know" she says casually.

"What about Eff?" he asks next, his back to her while he fiddles with one of his drum cymbals.

Naomi flinches. _Fuck. Nice one Naomi. Forget to mention your ex-girlfriend-who's-still-technically-your-girlfriend, why don't you, _she scolds herself irritably. "Oh, uh..." she stutters.

"She doing any better?" he asks before she can respond, throwing a hasty glance over his shoulder.

"Oh...yeah. She's feeling better this week. Think the worst's passed" she lies hurriedly. She secretly wishes she knew whether that was true or not. _Guess I'll find out soon enough, _she thinks, gulping.

"Cool" he says. He pauses for a beat. Then turns around to face her. "So how's everybody else?" he asks, approaching her and seating himself next to her on the couch. "Your mum? How about Emily? Haven't heard from her in a while". A smile tweaks at his lips as he says it. Naomi feels the same smile pluck at hers too.

"They're fine. Was onto mum the other day. She wants me to visit her more" Naomi says, chuckling. "And Ems, uh...yeah. She's good. Ran into her the other day" the blonde lies once more. She definitely has done more than just 'run into' Emily. "And what about you? How were things with Keith?" she asks, eager to get the spotlight off her for a moment.

Cook rolls his eyes and grins. "You know me and that lazy fucker. One minute we're having a good 'ol laugh, the next we're shouting each other silly. We're too alike, maybe that's why" he says, albeit affectionately.

Naomi giggles. "Two Cooks, hmm...dunno if I'd like that" she jokes, to which his grin grows wider.

"Ya love it, Blondie! I don't think you'd be able to handle two Cookie's though" he says, winking. She feigns indignance and gives him a shove. Cook only laughs, and Naomi finds herself relaxing as they fall into their old banter.

Freds arrives about ten minutes later – Naomi nearly had a heart attack when she heard the garage door sliding open – and the spotlight's firmly taken off of her and put instead on him. It's only just as she's become relaxed when things take a turn for the worse.

She sees rather than hears the door slide open this time, and of course she already knows who's going to be behind it. Can only watch in practically slow-motion as Effy's unearthly figure appears from behind the door and lets it fall closed behind her.

"Hey Effy" greets Freddie.

She doesn't reply. Merely shoots him a curt smile before striding properly into the space around them. Naomi wants to look away. Can't bear to look into the eyes of the girl whose heart she – possibly – broke. But she can't look away. But luckily for her, Effy's not even sparing a glance for her.

"Righ', so now that we're all here I guess we better get started" Cook says, all business once more as he hops lithely to his feet. "Keith was telling me about some 'battle of the bands' competition starting up in February, and I think if we get going now and practice our arses off, we'll be in with a good chance of winning".

Naomi's eyebrows shoot up with intrigue. They've never played in a competition before, but she's heard that these 'battle of the band' events always tend to have good prizes for the winners. Maybe this could be a break for them.

"Cool, let's get going then" Freddie says, jumping off the couch to his feet too. Naomi reluctantly follows suit, now acutely aware of Effy's muteness and complete indifference to them all. Indifference to _her_ mainly. And she's not gonna lie. It hurts. She may really like Emily, but she did give her heart over to Effy in some way. Her own pain is still raw. And seeing Effy like this, while she casually saunters over to the keyboard without even a look in her direction...it upsets the blonde. Resonates with her, as she dejectedly picks up her guitar and tries to get into a performing mindset. It proves difficult.

"Okay, I reckon we'll try 'Monotone' first. We've only played it live once, so I think we need to tighten it up a bit. It could turn out to be one of the highpoints of our performance with a little more practice" Cook says from behind her whilst he thumps lightly on his drums, testing them.

He then goes on to make some more play suggestions. Tempo changes, chord emphasis, crescendos. But Naomi isn't really listening anymore. The moment he'd mentioned 'Monotone', Naomi felt the heat drain from her face and her gaze unintentionally shot to Effy. The blonde could immediately see a change in Effy's stance; her shoulders had tensed and her fingers had curled into fists whilst they hovered above the keys. And Naomi could see then, now more than before, how hard Effy was trying to not look at her.

The ignoring carries on right until the end of Cook's little spiel, with which he promptly instructs them to begin. Freddie plucks gently at his bass, which is Cook's cue to follow in. A moment later and Naomi and Effy join in. The melancholy melody is almost distant to Naomi's ears – she has so much heat and panic running through her system right now that she can't believe such soft, willowy music even exists. But as Effy purrs out her first few words, Naomi feels a jolt of shock fly through her when, at last, those crystal blue eyes meet hers.

Her eyes are screwed up slightly into a weak glare, the lines showing at the corners. The whites are bloodshot; they make it look like she hasn't slept much since Naomi last saw her. But, for the first time, Naomi sees ache in those normally powerful blue eyes. Heat. Quiet anger. The brunette hadn't even shown such feeling during their actual break-up. But then, like all emotions with Effy, the ache is gone in an instant – Effy becomes the aloof keyboard player, the singer again and Naomi is back to being the guitarist. Nothing more, nothing less.

Naomi feels the panic dwindle inside of her as she continues to play and quietly joins in with her own shaky voice. The panic is replaced with sadness. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't glad she'd seen that though. She knows that seeing any emotion on Effy is rare. So when it happens, you know there's more to her. That she cares.

Right now, it proves to be a double-edged sword.

.

Thirty excruciating minutes later, Cook angrily calls for a break. So far they've been terrible; they'd passed through 'Monotone' shakily enough, but Cook had put it down to rustiness. Except then it continued to carry on into their other songs. Effy's tension seems to be contagious – she's been playing so passive aggressively that it's ended up throwing them all off. Naomi of course has an excuse to be thrown off by her, but after a while Cook and Freddie couldn't manage to salvage their own playing and ended up doing horribly as well.

"I'm going for a smoke" Naomi announces at large as they step away from their instruments. Effy isn't looking at her. Hasn't looked at her since their eyes first met earlier. But right now Naomi doesn't want to look at her. Wants to get away from this toxic atmosphere as soon as possible, and finds her feet on autopilot as she wrenches the garage door open and takes off outside. There's a light drizzle trickling down on her – the kind that doesn't get you very wet but makes your hair go all frizzy, but she doesn't care. Stops beneath a nearby tree and cups her hand around a fag, sheltering it from the rain while she tries to spark up.

Eventually it ignites and she takes in a large lungful of nicotine. Slowly exhales it as she tries to allow the chemicals to numb the whirlwind of conflicting feelings she's experiencing. On the one hand she feels incredibly guilty. Throughout the session, Naomi had slowly noticed how exhausted Effy looks. Her clothes looked raggy and unwashed. Well...more-so than usual. Her hair was tangled and greasy, and it looked as if the brunette had tried to backcomb it to salvage it a little. Her skin was even paler and more ghostly than normal. Her frame was gaunt and weak looking, like she hasn't had a proper meal since Naomi last saw her. Knowing Effy, she probably hasn't – Naomi remembers one instance a couple of months ago when she lived off just weed and drink for two whole days, until Naomi pleaded with her to have a sandwich or something. She begrudgingly did, but with Naomi not around to tell her similar this time, the blonde can't help but wonder how much – or little – the girl's had to eat.

It all adds up to make her feel horrendous. Make her feel bad that she was technically at fault for Effy being so broken. More broken than Naomi thought she would be, to be honest.

Except then, on the other hand, she's annoyed. This isn't entirely her fault, and Effy knows it. They both knew things weren't alright between them for a while. If she were being honest, they've never been alright. They never were a proper couple. Never did the ordinary things that other couples did. Hell, Naomi's pretty sure a sincere "I love you" has never passed between them. Can vaguely recall it being thrown casually out into the open on a drunken night out. Except she can't decipher whether it was genuine or more like one of those playful offhand things you do when you're locked – like how it's suddenly okay to get touchy-feely with every person you run into and tell them _"I fucking love you!" _whilst sporting a shitfaced grin.

It was okay then. That's all Naomi had wanted at the time. Didn't need anything more from Effy, and liked to think that the brunette had felt the same way.

Except, slowly but surely, she's finding that her wants are changing. Finds them changing the more time she spends with Emily Fitch. Is terrified by them, but exhilarated all at the same time. And although she doesn't know what it all means, she finds herself wanting to find out.

She's disrupted from her inner dispute then by the sound of a door slamming. Spots Cook marching towards her in the rain, an expression of intent on his face. She tries to keep her own expression neutral, but secretly she's been dreading this. Knows things are about to become uncomfortable.

"What the fuck was that?" her friend sure enough barks, gesturing offhandedly behind him.

Naomi calmly takes another drag of her cigarette, although secretly her stomach's in knots. "What do you mean?" she asks, feigning confusion. It's not convincing, so she isn't surprised when Cook doesn't buy it.

They boy shakes his head agitatedly and runs a hand through his damp, sandy brown hair. "Naomio...I'm no professional, yeah? But you can't tell me you didn't notice that pile of piss in there" Cook says, his eyes narrowing. He gestures behind him again. "Now c'mon...what was that in there?" he repeats, his tone softening a bit.

Naomi sighs, stubbing out her cigarette. "Effy's...still not feeling that great" she says quietly. It isn't a lie exactly, but it's not being entirely honest either. Cook immediately senses she's holding out on something. He blows out a long breath and uneasily meets her gaze.

"Is...is everything okay with you two?" he asks, his voice tentative and his eyes, for some reason, wide and fearful.

Naomi bites down hard on her lip. Crosses her arms protectively across her chest. This is it. She knows she can't lie anymore. Knows Cook will find out from Effy, if not from herself, anyway. Truth be told, she doesn't know why she didn't tell him in the first place. She could have saved herself such hassle if Cook and Freddie knew – she might have gained some compassion from them over Effy's behaviour today. But a part of her knows it's for several reasons. Maybe she wanted to keep this Emily thing to herself. If she told them about Effy, she'd have to tell them about Emily...and maybe she just wanted to keep Emily as her lovely little secret for a little bit longer. Wanted to keep Emily to _herself_ for a little bit longer. And then there was the complications of the band...on how their break-up would affect their music, like it was doing so now.

"Effy and I are done" Naomi finally murmurs out, her voice barely above a whisper. She doesn't look at Cook as she says it, but out of the corner of her eye she sees his face fall and his eyes widen further.

"Oh" he says after a moment, shocked. More shocked than she assumed he would be, if her paranoia was anything to go by. An awkward silence follows, but Cook eventually clears his throat. "Um...how come?"

Naomi hesitates. Debates with herself on whether to tell him about Emily, but realizes this isn't about her. Not really, anyway. "It hasn't been okay for a long time, Cook" she admits truthfully. Sighs again. "I couldn't kid myself anymore. And she...she deserves someone who really loves her. I mean, I do love her and all but...not in the way she needs. She deserves better" Naomi says, and is surprised to find her voice choking up with emotion. This whole ordeal must have affected her far more than she'd first thought.

Cook nods understandingly, but his face still looks very conflicted. "Ya sure you can't, uh, I dunno...work things out or nothin'?" he asks meekly, grasping at straws. Naomi's brow furrows at that. Cook has always shown distaste for hers and Effy's relationship. He'd never say it outright, but she always sensed that he thought they were just messing in things that shouldn't be messed in. Not being honest with themselves. Turns out he was right. And then there was his and Effy's history together, way before her and Effy ever indulged in anything romantic.

So why is he asking her to try and repair things now?

In the end she simply puts it down to him being a good friend. Trying to be supportive in her hour of need. She smiles at the thought. "I don't think so" she says, knowing he isn't aware of the whole story. "But thanks Cook. I'm sorry this is mucking up the session though" she says then, abashed.

Cook's expression changes. Gone is the worried look to be replaced with his usual easy smile. "It's alrigh' Blondie. At least now I know what's going on. But you've gotta try and pull things together, okay? 'Cause we can't have that happen no more" he says, gesturing behind him for a third time.

Naomi nods. "I know. Just tell Eff that" she says. She tries to laugh, but it comes out strained.

Cook's smile turns sympathetic. "C'mon babe. Back to the slaughter we go" he says, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her to walk beside him.

Ten minutes later and things have started up again, but unfortunately their efforts are no better than before. Naomi has improved a little though – it probably has to do with her getting those things off her chest to Cook. It's made her feel a whole lot less stressed, and hence her mood has increased because of it. Still, there's no improving the wave of destruction that is Effy Stonem – if anything, she's gotten worse than earlier, and it's fucking things up for all of them again.

"Look, Eff" Cook sighs after they've finished yet another disastrous rendition of one of their songs. Naomi glances over her shoulder to see him rubbing his forehead and his eyes screwed tightly shut. "I know you're not feeling the best at the moment, but could ya...try to pull it together a bit? We need to be taking this seriously" he says, his voice careful and hesitant.

Effy whirls around then, and Naomi is immediately scared by the look on her face. Her eyes are wide and questioning, and if it were possible there's even less colour in her cheeks. Then she utters her first sentence since she got here. "What do you mean...'not feeling the best?'" she asks, her tired and pale blue eyes narrowing at him.

Uh-oh.

The blonde looks back at Cook. He seems to have noticed his mistake at once. His form has shrunken into his seat a little. Freds merely glances nervously between the two of them, words lost to him. Naomi knows how he feels.

"Well I, uh...just know you've been a bit tired lately, that's all. But that's alrigh'...maybe we could all, um, go through one last song and call it a day?" he stutters fumblingly, his eyes darting around every which way.

One of the brunette's eyebrows quirk up, and her eyes suddenly widen again. Then, like the crack of a whip, her gaze snaps to Naomi. It's enough to send a jolt of petrified fear flying through the blonde's body. "Oh, I see" she rasps out, her voice dry and cracked. She stands completely straight, her face glossing over to become stoic once more. "He knows?" she asks Naomi directly, meeting her eyes for the second time. Petrified blue on stony blue.

Naomi's mouth opens, but then closes. She doesn't know what to say. Eventually she opens her mouth again and murmurs, "I told him we were over, yeah". A flash runs through Effy's eyes, but the blonde's more aware of the gobsmacked look that crosses Freddie's face out of the corner of her eye.

Effy nods shortly. The ghost of a smirk plucks at the corner of her chapped lips. "Does he know _all _of it?" she asks monotonously.

Naomi hesitates. Is vaguely conscious of Cook's stare on her back now. "No" she mutters out feebly, her head dipping.

Another flash runs through Effy's gaze. For a moment Naomi can see hints of those crystal clear blue eyes again instead of her tired and bloodshot ones. "Just the sugar-coated version, I'm guessing?" the brunette says wryly, and Naomi can't understand how she's keeping her expression so detached right now. The waver in her voice is the only thing that gives her away.

Before Naomi can respond, she hears Cook speak from behind her. "What's going on Naomi?" he asks. The way he says her name is soft and low, and causes some feeling to return to her fingers. All eyes are on her now. She sighs and unwraps her guitar strap from off her shoulders, placing it to her side. Then slaps her hands defeatedly to her sides.

"Me...me and E–"

A message tone blares throughout the room, cutting her off. It takes her a couple of seconds to realize with horror that it's her own. Without thinking, her gaze shoots to Effy. The girl's smirk has contorted into a weird grimace – she's clearly recognized the familiar sound of Naomi's phone. "Speak of the devil" the brunette says, her voice wavering again. There's a long pause, no movement being made by anyone in the room. "Well, have a look then Naomi. Don't want to keep her waiting. She won't like that". Effy reaches into her pocket then and pulls out a carton of cigarettes. "Mind if we call it a day now instead, Cook? I just remembered I have some place to be" she says casually, lighting up one of the fags she's taken out. Her words are too blasé to be truthful, but Effy doesn't seem to care. Seems to be making every possibly effort to make it seem like she_ doesn't_ care.

"Effy..." Naomi whispers, her voice suddenly not her own. She doesn't even know what to say to rectify things, but she can't stop herself from trying to reach out to the girl before her. The girl who, for someone who looks so exhausted, still manages to look eerily beautiful and graceful. It makes her heart clench.

Effy flinches at the tone of Naomi's voice, but doesn't look up. Starts to back up towards the garage door. "Sorry for being a bit shit" she says offhandedly, gesturing to her keyboard. She takes a drag from her cigarette."Won't happen again". She exhales, leans down and wrenches the door open, throwing a hasty glance over all of them. Naomi registers that quiet anger lighting up her eyes again. "See you". The door slams shut. Effy's gaunt stature disappears behind it.

She leaves a room full of silence behind her. A silence that carries on for what must feel like an eternity, before Naomi finally remembers the phone in her pocket. She slowly tugs it out and, sure enough, sees _one new message from Emily. _Clicks 'open' and reads the words which, dispute the circumstances, make a smile twitch at her lips.

_Did you make it out alive? :-) _it reads. She smiles wider. Recalls how she'd told Emily about her dreading this. How she was terrified of how things would be with Effy. Well, it turns out she was justified – but at least she can report that she is in fact alive. Before she can reply though, Cook speaks again.

"What's going on babe?" he repeats. Naomi looks around to see he's gotten to his feet and is standing next to Freddie. Freddie's bass has been cast aside and they're both looking at her with slightly shellshocked, yet curious, looks on their faces.

Naomi sighs. "It's Em". She waves her phone at them. "We're kind of...seeing each other now" she admits in a sheepish voice. Cook's eyebrows immediately shoot up his forehead. Freddie lets out a disbelieving scoff. When no-one says anything after a few moments though, Naomi feels the need to explain herself. "It's not actually the reason Eff and I broke-up, but...she's not exactly happy about it" Naomi explains, almost unnecessarily.

Silence continues to proceed her words. The blonde finds herself growing more and more frustrated. Starts to panic, worried that Cook and Freddie will judge her. But then, finally, Cook bluntly says, "Emilio's a lezzer? Fuckin' hell...why do ya always have to take the hot ones from me Naomikins?"

It takes a moment or two for Cook's lighthearted words to sink in, but when they do Naomi can't help the bellow of laughter that erupts from her. Relieved laughter. Cook and Freddie join in as well, and immediately the tension dissipates from the space around them.

Eventually, when they're all laughed out, Freds suggests the only thing that seems tempting to her right now.

"Spliff anyone?" he says, plonking himself down on the couch and pulling out a pre-rolled joint. Naomi and Cook join him there, sharing a relaxed smile.

Okay...so things may not be okay with Effy. But maybe they will be okay, eventually. With time. Until then, she can only hope and wait.

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* * *

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_Phew...angsty ;-)_

_I'm sure a lot of you will be feeling bad for Effy right now...but I'm not going out of my way to make things hard for her. Trust me. It's just how the story's going, and I'm sticking with my instinct._

_Moving on though...I'm afraid I've got some bad news. It's that time of year again. That time where my head shall be stuck firmly into a book in the hopes of me having a decent shot at my exams. That means this story's probably going to have to take a backseat for a while. _

_I'm not sure how long it'll be till my next update, but I just thought I'd let you guys know so you're not wondering where the next chapter is. Hope you haven't forgotten about me by the time I get back! ;-P_

_Let me know whether you enjoyed this chapter at all by clicking the little review button below. Thanks x_


	19. It Doesn't Hurt to Ask

_Yeah so...I'm back. Long time coming I know, but you can blame the fact that I got a new job and writer's block on my poor updating abilities. I know you guys have got better things to be doing than waiting around for some silly little fic like this one, but nevertheless I hope you enjoy this little offering. I'm getting back into the swing of things with this chapter, so it's sort of short. I hope it's okay though._

_Skins isn't mine, as we've already established. Damn._

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A long strand of red hair slips easily through her fingertips while she stares blankly ahead of her. A cool breeze whips by her face and tousles her hair lightly. It only adds to the tranquil atmosphere Naomi's unintentionally found herself in.

A low sigh pulls at her attention though, and she automatically looks down. Emily's head is still in her lap. Her face is calm and serene, and her eyelids still remain shut over her brown eyes. They flutter ever so slightly as she dozes. Naomi finds an involuntary and somewhat satisfied smile spreading across her face as she notices the half-smile on Emily's.

They're both sat –well, Emily's lying – on a bench in the middle of campus, taking a relaxing albeit rare break from what seems to be their abruptly oh-so-busy lives. Much of Emily's time is currently being occupied by some big art project she's been set for the semester. Apparently it accounts for a large percentage of her overall mark. Likewise, Naomi's up to her eyeballs with stuff too – between essays, readings and then this stupid 'battle of the bands' thing that Cook has her and 'Silverflux' mercilessly practising for, she barely has time to think let alone set aside spare time.

So she finds herself really appreciating these little chunks of time she gets to herself. Well, herself and Emily that is. But luckily for them, their busy schedules haven't really affected their attitudes or affection towards one another. If anything, it just makes them more excited to see each other. That's how Naomi feels, anyway.

About a minute or two has passed, but Naomi still hasn't taken her eyes off Emily. She finds herself cherishing these moments. The moments where she gets to study the redhead, undisturbed. They're pretty rare, to be honest. It gives the blonde a chance to examine Emily's features and the contours of her face, committing them to memory. The slight pout to her pink lips. Her button nose, and how it crinkles every so often. Her flawless, pale skin. Naomi's fingers continue to run thoughtlessly through strands of red hair, but her attention has been well and truly diverted. She watches Emily's small smile grow bigger then, causing her cheeks to dimple a little. Naomi can't help but wonder what it is that she's dreaming about.

"Are you going to stop staring at me anytime soon, or...?"

The husky and notably smug-toned voice of Emily pierces the quiet, and Naomi jerks out of her trance. She tries to hide the blush threatening to set fire to her cheeks as Emily's dark yet mischievous eyes finally reappear from beneath her lids. Naomi resumes looking ahead of her, not meeting the girl's eye while she answers.

"I thought you were asleep" she tries to say casually, except to her dismay it comes out a little sulkily.

The redhead sniggers from her lap, and Naomi can't help but look down this time. The smugness in Emily's expression has disappeared, but there's still a teasing look in her eye. "I was" she states. "But then I wasn't...and I just didn't bother to let you know. Besides...I thought it would be much more fun to let you keep staring. Not creepy at all, by the way".

Naomi groans loudly and jerks her legs, in turn trying to jerk the girl's head from her lap. She won't admit it, but she's embarrassed. She's not used to showing such unabashed affection – it's lucky she even did so at all, let alone just while Emily was sleeping. Normally she attempts to cover it up. But deep down, she thinks Emily knows this anyway. Is only teasing her out of affection, rather than cruelty.

Emily eventually sits up, swinging her legs back around so they hit the ground below. She scoots closer to Naomi then, but the blonde's wall is back in place; her arms are crossed defensively across her stomach, and her body is shifted slightly away from the redhead.

"Aw c'mon Naomes" the redhead pleads then, correctly reading Naomi's body language. "Don't be like that. I was only having a little fun. To be honest, I'm flattered".

Naomi doesn't budge. She represses the urge to "harumph" – might be a bit too much. Besides, why can't she tease Ems a bit too? Two can play at this game. "Don't you have a class to get to?" the blonde says emotionlessly, purposefully taking her phone out of her pocket to check the time. "Thought you might want to get out of here quickly...you know, what with my creepy _staring _and all" she says sullenly. A smirk threatens to pull at the corner of her mouth as she hears Emily sigh agitatedly. She loves to wind the redhead up. Provides her with some entertainment.

Unfortunately, Emily loves to wind _her_ up too. "Tell you what" Emily says, pulling gently on Naomi's arm until they're facing one another. Emily's eyebrow is quirked, and the blonde raises her own ones with intrigue. "Next time, I can stare at _you._ I don't mind being a creep, if it means I get an excuse to look at you". A devilish grin appears on Emily's face then. Naomi wants to force a laugh up her throat at the cheesy line. Wants to, except her throat is oddly dry. If said to any normal person, Emily's words would warrant a scoff and an eyeroll. Yet funny how the words have the opposite effect on the normally sarcastic, too-cool-for-school Naomi Campbell, huh? She suddenly finds her stomach fluttering and a bashful smile trying to tug at her lips. But again, she tries to hide it. Abruptly jumps to her feet, stuffing her hands into her pockets.

"Hmm...I'll pass" she says coolly, regaining some detachment. She starts to walk forward, but it doesn't take long before she hears Emily's footsteps swiftly approaching from behind. The redhead seems to have taken it all in good fun, because it only takes a moment for a small, warm hand to slip into hers. Naomi easily intertwines their fingers. Goosebumps rise up her arm at the touch despite the jacket she's wearing and the surprisingly mild February weather around them. "How's the art project going?" she asks a few minutes later, as they are indeed walking in the direction of Emily's next class.

A shrug from beside her. "Okay. It's slowly starting to come together. Give it another few weeks and I'm hoping there'll be something presentable there". It's said somewhat evasively, but Naomi can't help but delve.

"Can I see it?" she asks expectantly, turning her head to look at the girl.

The redhead doesn't meet her encouraging gaze. "Eventually" she says, again dismissively. Naomi doesn't push it. Knows Emily will open up to her, when she's ready. Besides, she acts the exact same when Emily asks about any of her work. No point in being hypocritical. "How's band practice going?" Emily asks then, meeting her gaze at last.

Naomi rolls her eyes. "Alright, I suppose. I don't see why we're doing this stupid competition though". Grass suddenly disappears from beneath their feet, to be replaced with concrete; they're back in the hub of the campus. "A bunch of poncy, trolleyed students doesn't exactly constitute my idea of a good gig. I mean, does it even matter if we play well anyway? It's not as if they'll care – it's all just a popularity contest at the end of the day". She feels a squeeze to her hand and looks around to see Emily looking at her with a slight frown marring her features.

"Who says you guys _can't _win? I've heard you, remember? You're good. Very good".

Naomi snorts. "You're biased" the blonde reminds her, smirking.

A disbelieving scoff sounds from the redhead. "Am I now? Well, let's just change that shall we..."

Without warning, Naomi's hand is gripping thin air; she looks up to see Emily walking swiftly and purposefully ahead, the arts block set within her sights. Naomi knows this game. Knows that Emily wants her to follow and apologise. The old Naomi wouldn't have, most likely...but she's found her attitude changing lately the more she's been with Emily. Finds herself not taking everything so seriously. This in mind, her feet make her decision for her; she quickly catches up to the redhead and grabs her shoulder, spinning her around so they're facing one another once more. Predictably, there's a cheeky smile on Emily's face, and Naomi finds a lighthearted one plucking at her mouth as well. And then they're both laughing, even though nothing is particularly funny. They both must look quite silly, actually.

But then Naomi's eyes meet Emily's, and the laughter dies in her throat. Emily stops shortly after as well; those bright brown eyes suddenly darken and the smile fades from her face. Naomi feels her own smile drop too. For some reason, the atmosphere is charged between them now. Different.

They continue to just stand there staring at each other for what must be a solid thirty seconds before Emily awkwardly clears her throat, her expression turning sheepish.

"Uh, so, erm...practice is going good then yeah? Even with Effy? How's, uh...she doing nowadays anyway?"

Naomi doesn't reply right away, and has to keep her brow from furrowing in confusion. _Effy? Why the fuck is she bringing up Effy? _she thinks uncomprehendingly, aware of the charge still between them. Fact is, Effy is the last thing on her mind right now. Not when she finally feels it's the right time – the _proper _time – to ask what she's secretly been wanting to ask for several weeks now. Wanted to ask, but never felt she was in the right place to ask at the time. Especially since she's never done this kind of thing before. Actually, come to think of it, maybe it's good that Effy's unexpectedly come up – allows the blonde to make the comparison between what she's never done, to what she's_ about_ to do now.

So before her overly rational and protective brain can butt in and ruin her resolve, she blurts out her question. "Do you want to go out with me?"

Emily's expression, which had turned remorseful as soon as she'd mentioned Effy, slowly changes to one of surprise and delight. Not overtly so though – it mostly shines through her eyes.

"Oh" the girl breathes quietly, rolling her lip between her teeth to hide a smile. Naomi feels her heart flutter upon realising that the action may be a positive thing. But the redhead doesn't say anything else; seconds drag on as they simply stare at one another again, Naomi's question dangling in the air above them. The blonde's confidence dwindles with every moment that passes. But it doesn't take long for her to realise why Emily is hesitating – _We already _are _going out, aren't we?_

True, she supposes. They've been seeing each other ever since the start of this year – even spending valentine's day together just last week – and are pretty much a bona fide couple by this stage. Even their friends recognise as such – Freddie, Cook, JJ, Liv and so on. Effy refuses to acknowledge this of course – things are still tense between them both. But Naomi feels even _she_ is grudgingly beginning to accept her and Emily's relationship.

But this isn't about that. Asking someone out is such a simple thing for other people to do. It's nerve-wracking, yeah. But if you like someone and the moment's right, it's only natural to ask. Except Naomi's whole life has been about not putting labels on things. Making things as simple and uncomplicated as possible. She tried to convince herself she was happier that way.

Something's changed though. Although Emily seems perfectly happy just to go along with things at the moment and not push, Naomi suddenly finds herself _wanting _the label. Wanting to be Emily's girlfriend. Wanting Emily to be her girlfriend.

Hers.

Eventually Naomi feels the moment has dragged on too long – too long to have a positive outcome, at least – and makes to backtrack. Before she can though, Emily unexpectedly lurches forward, using her toes for leverage, and presses her lips hard against Naomi's. It's not exactly romantic or gentle, but it still manages to make Naomi's knees go weak. She feels the urgency in Emily's kiss, reads the message loud and clear.

_Yes._

After what seems like an eternity, they both break apart for air. The contact isn't lost though; Naomi keeps her arms wrapped around Emily's waist, and vice versa. Dark brown eyes peer up at her from beneath hooded lids. Naomi has no doubt that her own blue ones are just as hazy. "Fuck, do you even have to ask Naomes? Of course!" the redhead says happily, practically exclaiming the last part.

Naomi attempts to conceal her glee by shrugging noncommittally. "Doesn't hurt to ask, does it?" she murmurs, an anxious smile tweaking at her cheeks and betraying her vulnerability. Emily notices, and in response reaches up again and presses her lips softly, more tenderly against Naomi's this time. The blonde responds fervently, rapidly becoming intoxicated by the sweet breath mingling with her own as Emily parts her lips. Their mouths move gently, slowly against one another's. Naomi doesn't want it to end. Wants the euphoria she's secretly feeling right now to fill her up forever. The euphoria at knowing Emily is rightfully hers at last. _Mine, _she thinks triumphantly, trying not to smile into the kiss.

Eventually Emily breaks the kiss, but as she pulls out of Naomi's grasp the blonde senses her reluctance to do so. She suppresses a smug laugh. "Okay, well, I um...I _really_ have to get to class now..." the redhead explains skittishly. Her face looks torn as she says it. Naomi checks her phone after she's taken it out of her pocket. The girl is ten minutes late. "I'll meet up with you tonight though, okay? We need to celebrate".

Naomi's eyebrows shoot up with intrigue. "Celebrate?" she asks inquisitively, a smirk threatening.

Emily's devilish smile returns. "Easy there tiger. You'll see what I have in store later" she says in her tantalisingly husky voice, throwing a wink in for good measure. Then she whirls around and Naomi watches as she practically skips – yeah, _skips –_ towards the arts building.

Naomi's elation keeps her in a blissful trance even after Emily has disappeared from view – she's there at least three minutes or so, not having moved a muscle. She can't remember the last time she felt so relieved and happy in the same instance. Often it was one or the other in Naomi Campbell's world. She's rudely snapped out of her trance however by a vibrating sensation coming from her jeans; she reaches a hand unhurriedly into her pocket and pulls out her mobile, groaning upon seeing Cook's name flashing across the screen. She opens the message unenthusiastically. The crude text elicits a snort from her.

_Oy oy dickheads. Practice 2mo evening. U owe me a willy waggle if ur late. Cya there._

The blonde rolls her eyes and stuffs the device back into her pocket. Then moves away at last, realising that it's kind of unpractical and not to mention strange of her to simply stand there like a tit all afternoon. Figures she might as well do some coursework in the library to keep her busy. Knows full well the effort will prove futile – all she'll be able to think about is what Emily has "in store" for her later. Grins fiendishly even contemplating it.

And not once does regret flash across her mind. Regret that maybe tying herself down to Emily, officially, wasn't such a bright idea. Maybe she is changing after all.

She can only hope it lasts.

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	20. On A High

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Naomi watches, bemused, as a bouncer roughly drags some scrawny pale bloke by the sleeve across the room and then promptly shoves him out the door. She scoffs and takes a sip of her drink.

"What?" a curious yet amused voice says from beside her.

The blonde glances sideways to see Emily's brown eyes staring up at her, her accompanying smile teasing. Tries to ignore the fact that their arms are brushing. "It's not even eleven yet – who gets kicked out before the night's barely even started? Tosser".

She saw it all; the space around them has steadily been filling up with people for the past hour or so, and it was only a minute or so ago that the bloke thought it would be a good idea to start a fight. A part of her wishes it could've gone on longer before being broken up – she could do with the distraction in light of what's in store.

Her blue eyes quickly scan over the crowd and then land on the band on stage, who are – in fairness – doing everything in their power to get the crowd going, to no avail. Naomi almost pities them. It's still a bit early for this crowd to be enthusiastic about anything, not to mention they're not nearly tipsy enough yet. This unfortunately adds to the fact that this act really aren't all that good. Well, that's being nice – they're a bit shit actually. It's a wonder they got this far in the first place.

A scoff mirroring her own sounds from beside her, and Naomi looks sideways again. Emily has a sceptical eyebrow raised. "What?" the blonde asks incredulously.

"Condescending much?" the redhead counters, the corners of her lips twitching.

Naomi throws her one of her patented eyerolls, raising her straw to her lips once more and taking another sip. "He was clearly a tosser, like every other posh wanker in here" she says after swallowing. "They won't care what I think. All they want to do is get shitfaced and maybe, if they're even bothered, listen to some music. Who cares?"

Before Emily can retort, a low, raspy voice just about manages to make itself known over the noise around them. "Careful Naomi. We're trying to _win_ votes, remember? Keep running your mouth like that and you'll get yourself into trouble". In spite of herself, the blonde feels a shudder rip up her spine at the sound. It's not a pleasant feeling. Then she looks over her shoulder and sure enough finds the voice's owner – the willowy stature of Effy Stonem stands a few feet away, perpendicular to where Naomi and Emily are leaning back against the bartop. A faintly satisfied smile tweaks at her cheeks as her eyes flicker to Emily and then back to Naomi. The blonde presumes that Emily is looking at the brunette now as well. Unthinkingly, she finds her hand making a grab for Emily's. The redhead meets hers, squeezing gently."Then again, your mouth tends to get you into trouble a lot anyway" Effy adds after a moment's thought, leaning back from the surface and off her elbows and walking around to their side of the bar.

Naomi's eyes narrow in suspicion as the girl comes to a stop in front of them, a faint glint in her pale blue eyes. It's not that Naomi dislikes Effy now. It's just that she never knows where she stands anymore. Things still remain relatively tense between them over everything that's happened but...well, it's not exactly good now, but it's definitely better. They're slowly starting to salvage what's left of their relationship. Time really can be a healer.

But it's moments like these, where she knows that Effy and Emily will be obligated to stay in the same place for the remainder of the night, that make Naomi feel uneasy. Like she's walking on eggshells.

She lets a tentative smile spread over her face. "I'm just having a go. You know me" she says airily. A waver in her tone threatens to give her away.

Naomi's only vaguely aware of Emily's stare hitting the side of her face as Effy's eyes flash unexpectedly. "Yeah" she says, her face going oddly blank. It's then that Naomi realizes her mistake. _Yeah. I do, _the brunette is silently saying.

Shit. Fucking eggshells.

Effy's quickly rearranges her expression however, transforming it back into that satisfied look. "Besides...most of them probably all go to the same college as you. So technically you're insulting yourself" she says wryly. "And...I was of the notion that you're usually quite the fan of getting a little...tipsy...on a night out. Makes it more fun, remember?" The blonde isn't exactly sure what Effy's trying to prove with this. But then she suddenly leans in a little closer, lowering her voice just enough so that only Naomi can catch her words. "Well, you _used _to find it fun. But things have...changed...I guess" she mutters, and Naomi doesn't fail to catch the pointed look she throws towards Emily. With that, the girl whirls around, her long wavy hair and billowing top flowing behind her, and strides straight into the crowd, disappearing in an instant.

The blonde remains silent and still moments afterward, not entirely sure what just happened. She places her empty glass back down on the bartop behind her as a distraction. It also gives her an excuse to avoid meeting Emily's eye. It must be hard enough for the redhead to be in Effy's presence as it is, let alone when she's playing her fucking omnipotent mind games. It's this thought that eventually forces Naomi to look uneasily towards her girlfriend.

Emily's not looking at her though, suprisingly. Instead her gaze is cast towards the stage, where the band have finally and mercifully finished up. Not that anyone seems to care, judging by the crowd's indifferent reaction.

"Em?" the blonde begins hesitantly, stroking a thumb over Emily's hand which is still gripped with hers. She's not sure how to gauge her girlfriend's demeanour.

Emily doesn't reply instantly, but after a number of seconds she eventually breathes out a long sigh. "Effy's looking good. She seemed...I dunno...kind of fragile for a while there. I'm glad she's doing better". Emily meets Naomi's gaze unfalteringly. What's even more astonishing than her sentence in itself is the fact that it was said with complete sincerity. There was no falseness there, and Emily's expression only goes to reinforce it – her eyes are warm and her smile is honest. Naomi can't help the wave of adoration that hits her. Emily Fitch really is something else.

She leans in then, slowly, as her affection gets the better of her. Her lips capture Emily's in a soft yet insistent kiss. Emily responds after a moment or two, evidently surprised by the gesture. "What was that for?" the redhead asks when she pulls away, her dark eyes displaying said surprise but with an added tender look in them.

Naomi shakes her head and chuckles. "Nothing" she says quietly. She releases Emily's hand and wraps an arm around her shoulders, tugging her in close to her side and placing a kiss to her red tresses. "Just...thanks" she mutters sheepishly. _Thanks for being you, _is what she really wants to say, however cheesy the sentiment is. She doesn't of course.

The tension dissolves fully after a while. Naomi eventually spots Cook and Freddie emerge from somewhere in the crowd. "Oy oy ladies! How's my favourite pair of muff monkeys doing?" Cook asks on approach, grinning wryly. Naomi wastes no time in unwrapping her arm from around Emily and leaning forward to shove him hard. "Hey there, jeez! I was only being friendly Naomikins, lighten up will ya?" he says, feigning offence. Naomi rolls her eyes and looks to Freddie.

"Hey Freds" she greets, notably friendlier than to Cook.

"Hey Naomi, Emily" he replies, lopsided grin in place. Emily nods in greeting to the both of them, a genuine smile on her face. "You all set then?" he asks.

Naomi shrugs. "I suppose. We can't be any worse than that lot before, can we?" she reasons.

Cook laughs darkly. "You better fuckin' hope not!" he exclaims. His expression turns serious then. "I was talking to the organiser there. He ain't too happy with the reaction so far. We need to put on a proper show if we're going to get this lot going–". He gestures to the crowd behind him, who seem to have become increasingly more restless and drunk in the last half hour. "–And get to the next round".

Naomi nods but doesn't say anything. They've done well to make it this far as it is. They got through their first heat easily enough back in February, but this time they might not be so lucky. The other two bands playing tonight – the previous one not included – are supposed to be good. One of them has even managed to gather a small fanbase. Naomi knows 'Silverflux' is in with as good a chance as any, but that being said they're in for some stiff competition tonight. She can only hope their merciless practice schedule – dictated by Cook – will finally pay off for them.

"You guys will be great. I don't doubt it" Emily pipes up then, sincerely. Naomi has to hold back a laugh, but not a cruel one. Typical of Emily to be so positive about everything. They're both very different in that way.

Cook grins widely and throws her a wink. "Cheers princess. I'll be looking for you in the crowd" he says, raising a hand and flippantly gesturing to her red hair. Naomi smiles to herself. She's glad everyone – bar _someone – _has welcomed Emily with such open arms. Even though Naomi knows it's quite hard to dislike the redhead. She just has such an authenticity and laid-backness to her that people can't help but be drawn to her.

"Attention everyone!" a booming voice suddenly calls through the mic. Naomi's jolted from her Emily trance by the noise and looks up towards the stage to see some pudgy bloke speaking into the mic, presumably the organiser. "Hope you're all having a good night so far. What a way to kick things off, eh?" he says. An unenthused murmuring sweeps through the crowd, which isn't surprising because the man's question wasn't said in a very convincing manner. He clears his throat gruffly and presses on. "Now then, I won't keep yas waiting any longer. Next up to the stage is 'Silverflux'!" he roars, before marching awkwardly offstage just as cheers and applause breaks out.

Cook does what can only be described as a jig of excitement at the announcement. "'Bout fucking time too! C'mon you two, we're up" her friend says, grinning. He then whirls around and makes a beeline through the crowd to the stage. Freddie follows unhurriedly in his wake.

Naomi lets out a long sigh and turns to Emily. "Wish me luck" she says monotonously, rolling her eyes and smirking.

Emily shakes her head disbelievingly and leans up to press a chaste kiss to Naomi's cheek. It burns. "G'luck" she mutters, her smile softening just before the blonde turns around and follows after her mates.

As she makes her way to the stage, Naomi briefly wonders where Effy is. She always has a tendency to run off just before she's needed. But the blonde's worry is unfounded when she spots Effy standing, all cool, calm and collected at the microphone already. She's twirling a strand of her long, scraggly hair between her fingers, looking thoroughly disconnected from her surroundings. Despite things being rocky with her as of late, Naomi finds it comforting to know that the brunette never lost that all-knowing, aloof quality to her. It's always been what's made Effy, Effy.

Wait...is that a good or a bad thing? Fuck. Who cares.

The blonde makes her way to her place and pulls her guitar up from its stand, strapping it around herself and letting it come to rest just below her waist. She takes a quick glance over the crowd. Half of the people seem genuinely interested in their arrival onstage. The newcomers here for their entertainment. The other half are too busy buying drinks, knocking them back and falling around with their mates to notice what the hell Naomi and the others are doing.

"How's it going lads and ladettes?" Cook's voice suddenly sounds from behind her. She looks over her shoulder to see her friend with his lips pressed to his mic. "We all having a good time?" he asks. There's a general disinterested murmur from the mass in front of them in response, and Naomi grins because she knows what's coming. "Fuckin' hell lads...I know yas can do better than that, yeah?" Cook says disdainfully, as predicted. The blonde looks around and catches Freddie's eye. They share a knowing look. "Now c'mon, I know you have it in you..._are we having a good time?_" he shouts. His loud voice booms through the mic, causing a screeching feedback to ring through Naomi's ears. It achieves the desired effect though; the crowd answers with much more vigour this time, although still rather pathetically considering its size. Naomi knows it's as good as they're going to get, and she's surprised to find that even Cook concedes defeat. "Alrigh' alrigh', enough chit-chat. Let's get this ball rolling" he concludes.

Cook then throws her and the others a coaxing nod, and Naomi prepares herself to begin. Her eyes flicker over to Effy, whose back is hunched forward towards her microphone. Even from behind, the blonde can't help but notice how it creates this purposefully awkward, gawky kind of pose...yet it still manages to remain graceful at the same time. It's hard to explain. But she knows she's not the only one who's impressed by it. Effy's presence has suddenly caught the attention of most males in the front of the crowd. She's also warranted many jealous looks from the girls. Naomi feels the corners of her lips twitching up in amusement.

"Hello" the brunette breathes out softly in that raspy voice of hers. The sound causes the smile to be wiped from the blonde's face and a flash of shock to cross over it instead. It's very uncharacteristic of Effy to address the audience at all during their performances. Still, it definitely manages to garner her more attention. Naomi watches as several more people towards the back look up with curiosity. The brunette doesn't have anything else to add though, and a moment later Naomi hears Cook begin to count them in. Then he beats out the first notes to their opening number, with Naomi and Freddie swiftly joining in with guitar and bass. Effy follows lastly with her gravelly vocals.

They rearranged the setlist for this particular gig, knowing that the crowd would need some encouragement. As a result, their opener is relatively upbeat and lively, coaxing the crowd to move and participate. It seems to work – with alcohol in their systems to drown out any inhibitions, the crowd suddenly begins to pulse together. Bopping and moving around to the music. Naomi breaks her concentration, which is thoroughly cast towards playing, and glances up momentarily. She manages to catch sight of a flash of red when she does so. Emily's staring proudly up at her from the middle of the crowd, a wide smile on her face. Naomi beams and throws her a subtle nod. Sees Emily's smile widen in reply.

The momentum continues until the end of the song, where the crowd promptly bursts into applause. It's a good start...but they haven't even gotten warmed up yet.

This is proven through their next few songs. They keep the lively rhythm going and don't slow down until they're at least almost halfway through their act. The club is full to capacity now, with drinks flowing all around. Emily doesn't move from her place, but eventually the crowd becomes so thick that Naomi can barely make her out anymore. It's only when that distinctive shade of red appears every now and again from behind and in between people that the blonde is alerted to her girlfriend's presence. Emily's a big girl though, so Naomi knows she's more than capable than looking after herself. It's this thought that allows her to remain entirely focused on playing, and as the crowd continues to respond to them, she finds she's really enjoying herself.

More notably, the others are enjoying themselves too. Every time the blonde glances over to one of the boys, they're grinning. Freddie remains near the edge of the stage to engage with the crowd while he plays, adding fuel to the fire. Even Effy is looser, shockingly. It's almost imperceptible, but Naomi can sense a change of air to the brunette. If she didn't know her as well as she does, she probably wouldn't notice. But it's the little things. The easiness of her movements. Her relaxed posture, which is normally tensed up during her performances to enhance that cool, unknowable demeanour she keeps up. Even when they inevitably reach 'Monotone', Effy's voice doesn't sound as constricted as it has been every other time she's performed it. And Naomi can't help it. A soft smile spreads across her face as she feels a rush of admiration towards Effy. Maybe things will be okay between them, eventually. Maybe, as Effy's resentment disintegrates, Naomi's guilt can disintegrate along with it.

As they reach the final climax of their act, Naomi feels things couldn't get any better. They have the crowd cheering for them. Eating out of the palms of their hands. If the response is anything to go by, they could very well get into the final of the competition. She doesn't really care if they do win or not if being perfectly honest – it was just great to participate, it was a great learning experience, blah blah blah and all that crap. She's indifferent...but that generous cash prize definitely wouldn't go amiss.

Naomi hits the final power chord, draws it out...and they're done. The crowd bursts into raucous applause that she can easily hear over the guitar's screech. The adrenaline keeps a wide smile on her face. She catches eyes with Freddie again. He gives her an encouraging wink and jerks his head repeatedly to the side. She looks in the direction he's indicating and bursts into laughter upon seeing that Cook is on his feet, shirt off and muscles flexed while he soaks in the crowd's ovation and energy. Her eyes roll back into her head as she shakes her head disbelievingly. Then she looks back to Effy, whose stealthiness remains all but obvious as she easily slinks offstage and doesn't bother to acknowledge the crowd. The lads in front are clearly disappointed.

Once it seems to grow a bit quieter, Naomi unwraps her guitar strap from around herself and places the instrument back on its stand. "Cheers everybody! You've been whopper" comes Cook's amplified voice from the speakers, just as Naomi makes to leave the stage. She suppresses a laugh upon hearing the quiet surprise in her friend's voice. She really didn't think the reaction would've been as good as it was either, particularly from this bunch.

_Maybe I _am_ a bit too quick to judge, _she briefly ponders while she begins to push her way through the crowd. Emily's positive outlook clearly must be having some effect on her after all. But then she scoffs. _Fuck that. I need a drink, _she concludes uselessly instead.

As the crowd's depth finally begins to lessen, Naomi catches the familiar flash of colour she's been searching for. Emily's standing at the bar now, in the exact same place she was when Naomi first left to take to the stage. The blonde can't help the wide beam that breaks out across her face upon spotting her girlfriend, and she promptly strides towards her. She could do with a congratulatory hug. Or kiss. Or grope. Or all of the above. She's not too fussy.

She's about nine feet away when Emily finally turns her head and sees her. Their eyes meet, and Emily's brown ones have that renowned sparkle in them that Naomi adores seeing. She's positively glowing with pride – and also an air of smugness – which causes Naomi's heart to expand to what must feel like twice its size. Her pace quickens, the adrenaline and infatuation combining to spur her on, as she strives to gather her girlfriend tightly in her arms.

But the euphoric emotions pulsing through her system also manage to delay her reaction process, because if Naomi were properly paying attention to Emily's expression – and not just how good she looks in those jeans from this distance – she would notice how Emily's elated expression suddenly contorts into one of confusion and shock as her eyes glance over towards something to Naomi's right.

The blonde eventually catches on though.

It'd be hard not to when a hand collides hard with your face.

.


	21. Author's Note

Well...it's been a while, eh?

Sorry to those of you who thought this was a proper update - the main reason I'm doing this now is because I wanted to say I'm _so_ sorry for not updating in, what...2 years nearly? Jeez, bad form BEBs, bad form! I've still been getting updates and reviews and favourites for this story even after all this time on hiatus, which is why I thought you guys deserved an update - the fact that you've still been so enthusiastic and wanting me to continue really has taken me aback, for which I thank you.

But unfortunately, I'm gonna have to be the bearer of bad news...I'm afraid I'm discontinuing "BTRG". The only excuse I have really is that I don't realistically see myself having the opportunity to finish it the way I want as I'm moving away soon, and also starting something else career-wise which will definitely be keeping me heavily occupied for the forseeable future.

I figured it was only fair to let you guys know so you won't be hanging on forever waiting (small consolation, but it's the best I can offer given the circumstances!) And just to give you _something, _I'll solve that cliffhanger for you - Katie was the one who hit Naomi. I can't exactly remember where I was going to go from there, but here's a few hasty tidbits off the top of my head:

**Don't read the next paragraph if you don't want to spoil the story for yourself.**

I think it was something along the lines of Katie obviously finding out that Naomi was going out with Emily and "converting" her into a lesbian, and Emily having to stand up to Katie. Except she wouldn't have done it as quickly and willingly as Naomi would have liked, causing a little bit of controversy between them (remember that Naomi was concerned about Emily's meekness when around Katie earlier in the story). Not too different from the show mind you I know, but obviously I would have tried to make it more original in other ways. Also, Naomi would have gotten to see Emily's artwork and Emily would have been fucking amazeballs at it (because she's always amazeballs, duh) and some paintings would have Naomi and Naomi-related things incorporated into them in some way. Some more things with the band would have happened - in fact I think I was planning on breaking them up at some point for some reason, probably because Naomi just wasn't that arsed and Effy would become too difficult to be around as Naomi and Emily's relationship grew.

I know that all sounds like a really shitty summary but I thought I'd leave you with some of my thought processes into the direction this story was more than likely heading in since it won't come to fruition.

So...that's it I suppose. I'll just leave this by saying thank you to every single person who read, faved, alerted or reviewed this story and also "Heart Skipped a Beat". It means the world to me that you guys at one stage or another actually enjoyed my writing and even told me as much, because it really helped spur me on to keep writing. Sadly life has just gotten in the way for me.

I don't see myself writing another fanfic (at least not anytime soon, but who knows!). I will be tuning into the final "Skins" series in July though out of curiosity - of course I need to see how my Naomi and Emily bbs are doing! I really did enjoy my time writing on here and checking out all the wonderful fics on here - sure I tend to pop in every now and again, so I'll most likely be floating around reading some of them again soon!

All the best guys,

BEBs xx


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